Pavilion Digest: March 2009

A plethora of perplexing pavilion posts. The Pavilion Annex thread, the Pavilion Discussion thread, and monthly digests of all messages from the Pavilion.

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Postby BrianSiano » Tue Mar 31, 2009 12:35 pm

Name: Brian Siano
Source: unca20090603.htm
The other day, I got a real surprise email. About six years ago, I posted something on my blog about the day John Lennon was killed. The day after, my English teacher, Bob Canzanese, spent the day talking to us about what Lennon meant to him. I'll never forget that day for the obvious reasons, but since I'd been getting into Lennon's solo work at the time, and since Mr. Canzanese was probably my favorite teacher, that was, well, one of those Great Moments for me.

Also, Canzanese was an extremely energetic and charismatic guy, and he was the sort of person you wanted to impress, even if he wasn't a direct mentor. I've thought of him every so often over the years, and wondered if I'd have disappointed him. He's the only teacher about whom I can say that.

Sunday I got an email from Bob Canzanese. He's recently retired, came across my note, and wanted to know how I was doing.

I took a day to think about the reply, because while he recalled me as being fairly bright, I didn't exactly set the world on fire after leaving Cherry Hill. So I spent the day with a lot of thought about whether I've done well or not, or whether I'd have been a disappointment or not, or whether the few things I've done on a creative-professional level were enough to take serious pride in.

So, in addition to the spring cleaning this week, it's been a few days of some serious thought and evaluation.

Travis Yoder

My twenty-eighth post here

Postby Travis Yoder » Tue Mar 31, 2009 12:36 pm

Name: Travis Yoder
Source: unca20090603.htm
SEMI-WRITER, if I may offer this: the problem is not people but rather our unrealistic expectations of them. Were trained to think that good behavior is normal, and bad behavior is aberrant. Where did we get this funny notion? People are animalsnot apart from nature, not fallen angelsbut grimy, groping, grit-n-gristle critters of flesh and basic instincts, to wit: to eat, to drink, to fight, to fuck, to piss, to shit, to laugh, to scream, ad nauseum. Your response is natural: of course were hard to love! Our ideas of civilized behaviorand let me state that Im all for them, unnatural though they may be (I find them elegant)are a smooth, glossy cover on a rough, riddled palimpsest older than higher thought. I realized this when I heard of some massacre du jour on the news one day and heard myself say, Unbelievable. I immediately reproached myself, Whats unbelievable about it? Its business as usual. Its how grandpa and grandma did things. The lie of human-as-civilized-animal goes hand in hand with the lie of nostalgia, I find. There was no fall from grace whether from heaven or merely the good ol days; only a striving and struggling toward grace and civilization that we may never reach.

Perhapsand forgive me for getting a bit precious hereperhaps were not to love people because we find them lovable, but because loving them can make them lovable? I know, I know. Its a stretch, and Im not quite buying it myself.

TONY ISABELLA, that dream is a doozy, brother! Im now imagining H.E. switching personalities with some giggly young cutie and the wacky antics to ensue. (Hey, it was mad fun on Gilligans Island.)

ROBERT ROSS, their DA-da DA-da-da names do have a pleasant meter, dont they? Therere also:

Bor-is Pas-ter-nak
Sher-wood An-der-son
To-ni Mor-ri-son
Ri-chard Ma-the-son
Da-vid Se-dar-is
Har-ry Har-ris-on
Ma-ya An-ge-lou
Spi-der Ro-bin-son
Har-ry Tur-tle-dove
Av-ram Da-vid-son
O-laf Sta-ple-don
Les-lie Char-ter-is
Ed-ward Bel-la-my
Zen-na Hen-der-son
Pe-ter Ham-il-ton
Don-ald Ham-il-ton
Bri-an Sta-ble-ford
Wil-liam Kotz-wink-le
Tri-cia Sul-li-van
Er-nest Cal-len-bach
Car-ol Em-shwil-ler
Wil-liam Ken-ne-dy
Da-vid Gu-ter-son
Nor-man Zol-lin-ger
Ri-chard Brau-ti-gan
Tho-mas Mal-or-y (I left the Sir out. Seems fair.)
Ste-phen Don-ald-son (I left the R. out. Is that cheating?)
Ed-widge Dan-ti-cat (Im guessing it fits.)
Ber-nard Mal-a-mud (IF he went by the British pronunciation of his first name; I dont know.)
Ro-bert Cor-mi-er (IF he went by an anglicized pronunciation of his last name; I dont know.)
Wo-le Soy-in-ka (Im just throwin that one out there; I dont have a clue how you say it.)

I hope this is a JEOPARDY category some day.

g off-for-now,

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Harlan Ellison
Harlan Fucking Ellison
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Postby Harlan Ellison » Tue Mar 31, 2009 12:40 pm

Source: unca20090603.htm

Will-yum Faulk-uh-ner
Sho-lem A-lech-em
Mac-Kin-ley Kan-tor
To-ny Hill-er-man
Dor-o-thy Par-ker
Jay-Ahr Tol-ki-en


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Postby H » Tue Mar 31, 2009 12:42 pm

Name: h
Source: unca20090603.htm

I try "never to" miss this show,


I try "to never" miss...

Tsk. -Harlan

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Harlan Ellison
Harlan Fucking Ellison
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Postby Harlan Ellison » Tue Mar 31, 2009 12:45 pm

Source: unca20090603.htm

Just saw your last post. Message received. I'll call you next week.


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Harlan Ellison
Harlan Fucking Ellison
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Postby Harlan Ellison » Tue Mar 31, 2009 12:54 pm

Source: unca20090603.htm
My response to your query, if judged by 98.5% of the members of the Baby-Boomer, Slacker, X, Y, or Z, or Goth Generations, would be, "Fuckin' crazy old geezer dickwad!" They saturate the lecture halls and classrooms, the internet squawk-threads, the coffeehouses, the online fanzines, the tv "celebrity" whorecasts, and the streetcorners. They are ignorant, sloppy, meanspirited, graceless, ungrateful, moronic, self-involved, naive, bigoted, and relentlessly sheeplike. Your three hours of time-wasted happens to all of the few of us who subscribe--sanely, sanely--to cultural elitism. I've been there since I was 10; you still have a long way, and oodles of loathing, to go, my sweet.

As an outsider, I look on the Human Race with Mencken's utterly jaundiced eye.

Does that cheer you up?


Well, best I can do. You are not alone. Or rather...

You Are Not Alone.

With an affectionate bump on the bicep, Harlan "Same Boat" Ellison

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Postby Moderator » Tue Mar 31, 2009 1:15 pm

Name: Steve Barber
Source: unca20090603.htm
"Are you stumbling about like a crip in your own syntax? Are you simply trying to say it's the BIG toe on the LEFT pod?"

Yes. That's it exactly. The big toe, on the left foot.

It was easily found by the doctor today as she plumbed the still heavily bruised, slightly inflamed digit and pronounced it "broken".

So, here I sit waiting to load up on Advil, having given, truly, my big toe in the cause of Conservation.

Now: Can we please all arrive at a different demonstration of saving the planet? One which does not entail turning the lights out and a tumble down the stairs?

On the other hand, as I noted elsewhere, I am withdrawing the application to have "Cement Diving" added to the Summer Games.

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Thank you, kind sir.

Postby Semi-Writer » Tue Mar 31, 2009 1:33 pm

Name: Semi-Writer
Source: unca20090603.htm
Ah, yet for all your mad "crazy old geezer dickwad" ravings, there are still elements in your personality that suggests a dogged compassion for your fellow creatures--let us direct the Klieg lights onto the esteemed Susan, a noble example if ever there was one. Not many women will take an impromptu nude eviction in stride, you know.

By the way, that 1.5% appreciates that you're hanging in there. 'Cause, like, y'know, like the, uh, like, other people and stuff, uh, can really be a bummer, dude.

(Though my heart may be emblazoned with metal letters that read FRIGIDAIRE, however... thank you for not jerking on the handle. And given the family longetivity goes into the 90's, there should be a long road of disgust ahead. Turn left at the corner of Dignity and Loathing, then?)

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Postby Tom » Tue Mar 31, 2009 1:50 pm

Name: Tom Morgan
Source: unca20090603.htm
Robert Ross,

Thomas Jefferson

I hear he long ago wrote some good stuff for a bunch of subordinate treasonous wackos who were trying to start their own country. The nerve of some people...

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Postby Chuck Messer » Tue Mar 31, 2009 2:09 pm

Name: Chuck Messer
Source: unca20090603.htm
I don't hate humanity. I really don't. I don't hate them when I listen to Beethoven, or eat an especially tasty dish, or read about human beings who help others, or read fine writing, etc.

But I do hate the shitty things people do to each other. The same people who can be great composers, chefs, artists, authors can also be dastardly human beings. I got an early education about the underbelly of human nature when I was a kid. From my fellow kids, naturally. I also learned the obtuse, feckless and spineless nature of people in authority from school officials. I also learned about how power corrupts. All before high school.

That doesn't even touch the truly ugly things people can do to each other on a massive scale.

Most ugliness is petty, and leaves no bruises or abrasions, but can still wound -- and are meant to.

Some of the world's uglinesses are perpetrated for petty reasons. Take for example the number of people killed by governments in the last 100 years or so. 200 million people. Dead.

Because World War One led to World War Two, the Soviet Union, Communist China, the Cold War, the Holocaust, Ethnic Cleansing, Korea, Vietnam, Cambodia's killing fields, the suffering in the middle east, the mass slaughters perpetrated by Stalin and Mao...

All because Kaiser Wilhelm had one arm shorter than the other. Because the doctor who brought him into the world broke his little arm in the process. In a macho, militaristic place like Germany, that led to scenes like a screaming, crying young Wilhelm being placed again and again on a horse by his father after he fell off time after time. Incidents like these let to his feelings of inadequacy which informed his disastrous foreign policy which alienated allies and made an enemy of Great Britain, which made a nasty little incident in the Balkans into World War One.

All because Wilhelm felt he had to make up for a birth defect caused by an inept doctor.

Sometimes, it seems the world is run by none but charlatans and psychopaths.

How can a species who can create such beauty also be capable of such ugliness?

I don't hate people.

I just wish they'd treat each other better.


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Not cement diving, but...

Postby JasonDavis » Tue Mar 31, 2009 3:01 pm

Name: Jason Davis
Source: unca20090603.htm
Steve, I too have had a peculiar week as regards concrete. My neighborhood has, for the last two weeks, been plagued by sidewalk "improvements." To wit, I am awakened by jack-hammering at dawn and annoyed by assorted noises of "progress" while working all day.

With the noise on my block reduced to a dull groan of distant machinery, I set off this morning to deposit my gas bill in a post box some two blocks distant only to discover en route that the "concreteers" had been round before me and not thought to leave any indications of their a cone, or sign, or any-damn-thing. The matter was not helped by the fact that the patch of sidewalk in question was under a tree which obscured the slightly darker shade of the pavement and one or two leaves marred the pristine expanse and lent it a natural appearance.

Whilst walking at a brisk pace, it evidently takes three footfalls before I register there's something amiss beneath my feet.

And to think last week I resisted the temptation to write my initials in front of my house...I guess a series of footprints a few blocks away dealt with that impulse.

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Postby stevendooner » Tue Mar 31, 2009 5:54 pm

Name: Steve Dooner
Source: unca20090603.htm
I actually don't think humanity is bad, just not that good.

And I'm absolutely impressed that we didn't blow the whole thing to hell along time ago.

Gee, I'm gettin' all misty. I never knew I was such an optimist. *sniff*

Rod Williams

J.R. Lansdale

Postby Rod Williams » Tue Mar 31, 2009 7:49 pm

Name: Rod Williams
Source: unca20090603.htm
DTS Wrote:

"P.S. The new Joe R. Lansdale -- VANILLA RIDE -- is one HELL of a read! (Trumpet the news: the boys (Hap & Leonard) are back!)"

Thanks for the tip-off. I own but have not read FREEZER BURN. That book is quite easy to find cheap in Australia, owing to the fact that it was probably remaindered after publication. Not sure. Have enjoyed all previous Pine/Collins novels.


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Postby Justin » Tue Mar 31, 2009 7:54 pm

Name: Justin
Source: unca20090603.htm
Someone once wrote into In These Times magazine and asked Kurt Vonnegut some dopey question about how the American public could be so stupid. Vonnegut responded, in part, that the questioner should seek out Mark Twains The Mysterious Stranger, and that if this person still doubted afterward that we humans are all demons in Hell, then he should read the morning paper. Never mind what paper. Never mind what date. I like that. I like The Mysterious Stranger, too.

As a yoga teacher Im spoiled. I get to deal with people who display more than a passing interest in becoming calmer, stronger, more collected human beings. People who are willing to do some hard work towards that end. Some people come in perfectly healthy, but most people come in with chronic pain, body image problems, and so on. Ive taught over a thousand yoga classes, and who knows how many students over the past three years? I have many exceptional students, but I see so much pain and devastation and self-sabotage, and I think, Yipes, and these are the ones who are seeking with all sincerity, as far as I know, to heal themselves! So much damage has been done to even the best of them, having seen that has made me a little more patient with individuals, I suppose. Too many birds with broken wings. And too many trolls with which to war. With helmets and swords fashioned of old newspapers we must soldier on, I suppose.

Faisal...Syria, eh? Sounds sexy. I might be across the pond shortly. Drop me a line sometime and let me know who youre busy antagonizing these days. Always curious to know.


Edward Brock

I Hate People

Postby Edward Brock » Tue Mar 31, 2009 8:15 pm

Name: Edward Brock
Source: unca20090603.htm

I recently sat through all 29 (current) parts of a YouTube video series entitled, "Why People Laugh At Creationists?" (if you're interested, the url is here--

It amazes me that people are this ignorant. I see such Creationist pushers as Ray Comfort & Kirk Cameron (from Way Of The Master), Ben Stein (of Expelled) or the YouTube idiot VenonFangX & feel my blood pressure rise at the stupidity that escapes from their lips.

The most frightening aspect of all this is the number of people who adhere to this nonsense and then wallow gleefully in their ignorance as if it were a virtue. When exposed to such complete & overwhelming stupidity, it is very difficult to find anything to "love" about mankind.

I am thankful that not everyone falls into this category. And this fact offers some hope. Although I hate people, I do like individuals.

As Agent K said in Men In Black--"A person is smart, people are stupid." I'll have to be happy with that, I suppose.

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