Unca Harlan's Art Deco Dining Pavilion

Archive - 03/15/2009 to 06/03/2009

Unca Harlan's Art Deco Dining Pavilion

Chuck,

I'm glad your step mother brought the schnitzel. My mom's got one too-- his name is Cy. She once offended my younger brother Barry by calling him (my brother) her "other dog". It wasn't an insult-- Mom friggin' ADORES the dog. Her heart rate was 47 BC ( before Cy) now it's up to 60. She says she had no idea you could love a dog.

Like I said, I'm glad your step mom brought Sabrina by to see your dad. Probably cheered him right up.
:)

Still with you in spirit, my buddy,

Cindy



Steve Perry and Shagin,
I know the terrain too. My mother-in-law presented with Alzheimer’s at 58. I'm sorry-- it shouldn't happen to anyone.

Cindy




Mark Goldberg,

I am thinking about you and your mom--and praying for the same things our Chuck mentioned. We're here for you. Don't forget that. We care about what happens to your Mom.
Cindy



ATC
You have all my positive thoughts and prayers. May you have a
safe journey and come back here to us.
Cindy



KRISTIAN BLAND--y'all do know he's a Texas boy.
So proud to claim him.
:)




Dr.Landsberg,
I have been on a blueberry binge too! I nearly foundered on them last week. I still have a cyanotic tinge to my lips and fingertips. If you saw me you'd inject me with Thallium and
take pictures!

:)
Cindy



Hooray for Shawna McCarthy and Warren Lapine! They are the lucky ones. This solves the itch I have for; How Interesting: A Tiny Man. I've been antsy to read it since the title was mentioned.

A-TC, you have a deal

An update on my Mom, she had an external stent placed in her today to address the problems with her liver. Tomorrow she has an endoscopic CAT scan and the doctors will be able to definitively tell if the cancer has spread and, if so, how far. Fingers, toes, and every other body part I can manage are crossed right now

Not sure of what my plans for returning to Philly. My family threatened my with bodily harm if I flew up right now, in a best case scenario I will be there when she goes in for surgery on her pancreas to remove the mass. Trying real hard not to think about worst case scenarios

Mark

"...murky void of amateurs, wannabes, rebooters, freebooters and loud-mouthed fanboys."

I think I'm a wannabe. I wannabe rich and famous.

REPLY TO HEATH FODOR

Lovely of you to want to put DREAMS DVD money directly into my dust-filled pouch, chum, but in this case (because we DO sell many out-of-print items) it would be unethical--not to mention a big-ass nuisance--for Susan and me to be selling the documentary. The people who bought the franchise have the right to hawk it; and I'm content with that. Apparently (according to Amazon, as of today) it is #43 on their "Hot Hundred." Which means it's doing better than the ten million OTHER docs available.

But please, by all means, get it from the legit source. I will smile on you from afar.

Yr. Pal, Harlan

Heavyhanded Fun with Nature!
Wasp infestation in garage + Illegal farm DDT + Boredom/Creativity =

Waspchucks!

or rather

Wasp Flail!

Instead of a metal ball with spikes it will have a ball of dead, poison soaked, giant ass wasps all glued together in a heap. Now, I don't have nearly enough dead wasps to do this, but I am filing the patent as we speak. Are their laws against the concealed possession of weapons made from animals?

You know what would be cheaper, more fun, and just as dangerous (if not more)? Playing with fire!

I'm gonna go play with fire and have unprotected sex with a vintage inner city prostitute!

ZM

QUERY TO MICHAEL S. IN MANNAHATTA

Why is that a "ghastly line" on the DREAMS DVD package? I guess I'm getting either slow or more tolerant in my dotage, but it seems a perfectly okay piece of verbiage to me. Please elucidate, blow away my fogginess.

Harlan

A TIP O' THE ELLISONIAN HAT TO KRISTIAN BLAND

Hallelujah, brother! What you said, in spades! Oh, how I would wish yours was the dominant intelligence at loose in this murky void of amateurs, wannabes, rebooters, freebooters and loud-mouthed fanboys.

You d'man!

Yr. Pal, long-suffering Harlan

Cleveland and Coney Dogs
Harlan,

It's good to hear that Realms of Fantasy has been resuscitated and your story will appear in the magazine.

When we moved to Jackson, I discovered everyone eating coney dogs. Having grown up on Chicago dogs, I am still getting used to these kinds of hot dogs. Did the influence of these culinary treats extend down to Ohio during your youth?

Thanks,
Heath

P.S. Is there a way I can buy the Dreams DVD from you? I am sick of buying your stuff from Amazon.

brain boost
Now we know: Blueberries appear to enhance brain function!

I'm eating a bushel a day!!

(Disclaimer for those who take everything a doctor says with unadulterated seriousness -- one half to one cup a day should be plenty.)

Semi In the immortal words of Spock, (Mr. not Dr.) a difference which makes no difference is no difference. Jesus, whom was the main topic of my conversation, was pretty emphatic about not harming others and sacrificing ourself if needed in pursuit of this goal. Not that I can conform to this goal; but I do try, when I am being my best self. "That man's grasp should exceed his reach. Or what's a Heaven for?" Browning, I do believe. With apologies for the second post.

Bible note
Actually, the Old Testament--as stated in its original language of Hebrew, the first language the "Bible" was written in after centuries of oral history amongst the tribes--dictates, "thou shalt not murder." Sometimes you may HAVE to kill to defend yourself, your spouse, your family, your property and that's permitted. But "murder" is a no-no. (The word "kill" got substituted for "murder" due to translation after translation taking place over the centuries. No one language translates directly into another, after all.)

Dear Tom M.

Received YOUR HERC renewal. Received Jonathan's renewal & book order (will go out today). 10 Karma points.

Many thanks - Susan

Barney I wasn't deferential enough to Ms POTUS? I do humbly beg forgiveness.

Wait a minute! She IS his wife right? They're not living in some ungodly unAmerican IMMORAL relationship are they?

I suppose all that juris whatever from Princeton sounds awfully impressive to you huh?

Well I'll have you know I grad-jee-ated summer come gaudy from the ZEBULON T PIKE BARBER COLLEGE with a cer-tif-ee-ket of atten-dance. There were three of us in the class. One's in jail, one's dead and I can perform the best buzz cut in the county.

Eat my dust.

Hi. Harlan, kudos on selling your story. I look forward to reading it. To Adam, Mark, Semi, Chuck, and all others here undergoing family illnesses, you are in my thoughts. The news about Dr. George Tiller is so sad and just depressing that I
can't comment further. What is wrong with the people on this planet? How did the loving, gentle message of forgiveness Jesus taught get so twisted by such vast majorities of people? As I remember my Bible, the commandment says thou shalt not kill. It does not have foot notes which say, unless you are in war, or you disagree with the person, nor even unless you are defending yourself or another. In fact, Jesus says turn the other cheek if someone strikes you, give them your cloak if they take your shirt, (I paraphrase here). Judge not and ye shall not be judged. Let he (or she) who is without sin cast the first stone. That is Jesus' message. Plain and unadorned. Not subjest to interpretation. Where how why do these people get off with their horrible thoughts and actions, and yet call themselves Christian? I fall so short of Jesus' message, i should be ashamed to claim myself a Christian. Yet I know that is my fault, my responsibility to fix. I don't know.
Roger, you sould like a great and kind and smart person. I enjoy your posts so much. Yet I enjoy Frank's too. And applaud Frank's courage in expressing his point of view. As I do yours. Reasonable minds can differ. And I think the only things that truly offend God are when we hurt each other, or the creatures on this planet or the planet herself. And maybe a little when we doubt his love or his great mercy. And by we, I mean people who believe. I have no issue and never have had with those who are truly atheists or agnostics. As long as they have no issue with my beliefs.
At least here, in Harlan's internet nest, let's all cut each other some slack and play nicely.
May all here be well and happy. And may our planet be watched over by some gentle, loving power somewhere. Cause otherwise, I think we are all majorly screwed.
Diane.
P.S. Apparently, I could comment more. Verbose girl, very verbose. D

Fun + Fine = Fune

Yeah, that's it...

slinking away now...

HARLAN - Eagerly awaiting the story. Glad to hear it found a fune home.

***

A-TC - Opening another can of warm fuzzies as we speak. Painkillers are not fun, but the alternatives are even less so.

Josh, I'm sure Olbermann will try to avoid even mentioning the guy for a long time.

The irony is that slamming O'Reilly actually helps his ratings.

I still predict that someone will say something that will make Billo do something violent. Can't wait for that day.

-----------

I like what Andrew Sullivan said on Olbermann. Even though he is against partial birth abortion, he thinks we should debate the issue, not kill people.

I myself am quite squeamish about abortion, being that I believe that every baby may have a human soul. The Tiller murder is just wrong. If a lefty killed someone I would say the same thing.

For those of you wondering as I did..
...Realms of Fantasy's website is: http://www.realmsoffantasymag.com/

Various
Mark, let's continue to exchange crossed fingers.

For everyone else: my Dad is out of his head on painkillers and not making much sense; I have not flown north yet, but may do so next week. Keep those positive thoughts flying.

*

A matter of fact that isn't very important: the proposed ALIEN remake is not a remake, but a totally unnecessary prequel, detailing the back history of the "space jockey" whose burst chest prefigured the fate of Ripley's crew in the first movie. This still falls into the who-cares territory, as much as (I must admit) any further ventures into the superhero movie subgenre. I must admit some anticipation of Branagh's THOR, as he *might* be able to do something interesting with the Norse sections, but when I say there are novels, actual fer-real novels, and historical material that I'd much rather see adapted into film and appearing at the multiplex than some (hypothetical) $200 million monstrosity starring Seth Rogan as AMBUSH BUG, I mean it...

*

With my indulgence, the podcast magazine Starship Sofa has presented a reading of my past Nebula nominee "Of A Sweet Slow Dance In The Wake of Temporary Dogs." It's about 38 minutes in, and fifty minutes long.

This is the best story I've ever done, and, sad to say, the best I'm ever likely to do. I do, however, need the warn the unwary that it's no walk in the park. Its gentle beginning aside, it leads to some violent and upsetting places, before climbing back to some semblance of light.

http://www.starshipsofa.com/20090603/aural-delights-no-87-adam-troy-castro/

One correction. The site credits the story to ANALOG, whereas it actually appeared in Keith DeCandido's much-ignored anthology, IMAGININGS.

*

Out of affection for me, my wife long ago coined a word for the horse-shoe shaped hairstyle that is male pattern baldness. She calls it a "Shmoe-hawk."

Harlan, great to hear that the story sold. Can't wait to read it.

Anyone interested in delving into the "Catcher in the Rye" lawsuit may want to take a look at this ruling, which likely will have a bearing on it:
http://caselaw.lp.findlaw.com/cgi-bin/getcase.pl?court=11th&navby=docket&no=0112200opnv2

It's a federal appeals court ruling that threw out an injunction barring publication of "The Wind Done Gone," a novel using the same characters, plot, etc. as "Gone With the Wind." The parties later settled the case.

Harlan-great to hear about the story. Now,as to the RYE sequel-it's not strictly a sequel. It involves a 75-ish character only referred to as C, who along the way encounters Salinger.I'm not sure then that this is a direct sequel which would be a cause for censure, in my eyes, or a work like Kinsella's SHOELESS JOE.( another book Salinger was none too happy about and made sure that he did not make it into FIELD OF DREAMS) So,we'll see. But I do agree that there's far too many remakes and sequels out there. They're planning remakes of ALIEN and STRAW DOGS, for example. Not only were both originals done so well (and neither of those,ironically, original) but they are also in the list of most unofficially remade movies ever-like the 3 Quatermass BBC serials, FORBIDDEN PLANET, THE DAY THE EARTH STOOD STILL, JEKYLL AND HYDE, THE MOST DANGEROUS GAME and so on.

"Between Hollywood "reimagining" almost every damned franchise ever in the history of cinema and television, and now these sorts of stories about the same thing happening in the literary world, it's enough to make you want to take Tim Leary's advice and just drop the Hell out."

I keep having a strange feeling that there's a really good horror/satire story about the gradual disappearence of originality from the world. Maybe some type of alien lifeform is secretly leeching away our collective creativity?

Brian Phillips, thanks for the heads-up regarding the suit against the so-called 'Catcher In The Rye' sequel. How something like this hasn't made everyone's heads explode is a mystery.

I'm getting increasingly annoyed at all of the sequel and reboot mania that's going on these days. People used to call this crap fan-fiction, and it stayed in the cold, dark shadows of dingy and suspicious looking basements where it belonged. Now it walks out in the open with its head held high, and a spring in its step.

Nowadays, people not only feel connected to the characters and stories that someone else has written, they feel entitled to them in ways incomprehensible to me. Unless you have the permission of the original author who, (through some sort of ceremonial affair involving torches being passed about and possible chanting), grants you the right to carry on his work - then you're just a wordsucking leech and a parasite, and the world would be better off if you'd just go back to whatever rancid pool you crawled out of.

I hope Sallinger wins his suit, but I don't have a lot of confidence. Most likely, the author will just make a few changes and call it an homage or a "spiritual successor" to 'Catcher' - blah. If there's any justice at all, it simply won't sell. That's probably the best we can hope for with such a dismal situation.

Between Hollywood "reimagining" almost every damned franchise ever in the history of cinema and television, and now these sorts of stories about the same thing happening in the literary world, it's enough to make you want to take Tim Leary's advice and just drop the Hell out.

Grrr! Argh!
Kristian

Great news! Please keep us posted so we can scoop up copies when the issue comes out.

DVD
Jonathan,

if your laptop runs Windows, you might want to Google "DVD Region Killer", a tiny piece of software that will allow you to play any region regardless of the hardware limitations of your laptop.

(It's also sometimes possible to "flash" a DVD drive in a laptop to make it region-free, but this changes the drive firmware, and is not for the faint-hearted!)

Phil: Thank you very much; you’ve made my day.

DTS: I should have mentioned this earlier, but this is an approach I’ve already investigated. Both of the devices I use to play DVDs, a laptop and a Playstation 3, can’t be adjusted in this way. I’m sorry for causing this confusion. Thanks for trying to help me out.

With gratitude for assistance given, apologies for time wasted and excitement for my just-this-minute ordered DVD,
Jonathan

LOOSE ENDS

TRIED TO SLEEP, COULDN'T...

Couple of things gnawed:

1) KOS, did I thank with sufficient profusion, your Susan for the beat-up-but-beautiful HUCKLEBERRY FINN? Ifnot, please enter same immediately.

2)Ryan Leasher, the DVD went off to New Zealand yesterday. A
VOICE FROM THE EDGE: Volume 3 as soon as Blackthorne releases it. Next two/three months I believe.

3) The new story, "How Interesting: A Tiny Man" has sold to Editor Shawna McCarthy and publisher of the resuscitated REALMS OF FANTASY, Warren Lapine; it will be in the first or second issue, due very soon.

Yr. Pal, Harlan

Frank,

"Kudos to Olbermann for saying that he will no longer mention Billo. At least for now.

See how long that lasts."

That's not what he said. What he said was that he was never going to use the Ted Baxter voice and paint O'Reilly as a cartoon character again. He made it very clear that he'd continue to cover this monstrous villain whenever events called for it, but he was done making him out to be a buffoon, as these recent events make it very clear indeed exactly how despicable and immoral the son of a bitch is.

It's a given that O'Reilly - like all monsters - will eventually hang himself with his own noose, but goddam, isn't there something we can do to hurry that blessed day up?

Dr. Tiller
I just donated to Planned Parenthood in "honor" of Randall Terry. They will send him a nice card telling him so. I feel better, even if microscopically.

Mark Goldberg,
I hope the mass is benign and that it can be removed poste-haste. Best of wishes and thoughts.

I hope things are okay on your, front, Adam, as well.

I went to see my dad at the Life Care Center today, but he was asleep. I'll try again tomorrow. I saw on the sign-in sheet that my stepmom came by with their wienerhund, Sabrina. She signed in as Sabrina. Cool. I think it helps Dad.

Chuck

Forward into the past
"Obama & wife"

Nice. Always good to know what being married to the P.O.T.U.S. and being a graduate of both Princeton University and the Harvard Law School with a Juris Doctor will get you these days.

So much for book lernin', eh?

Sincerely - Barney Dannelke

OK, the longish YouTube excerpt from Dreams that I mentioned is gone. It was a case of someone wanting more people to hear what Harlan has to say (who doesn't), but my good advice was heeded.

And the pirating of the DVD has, of course, begun, the main thing to look at, for now, being the links on this page: www.torrentreactor.net/find/dreams-with-sharp-teeth

Since this will continue, it would be good to know if Erik is interested in having such links reported by us and if there is an e-mail address we can send them to, or if everything is under control. I just went to the website and (still) found no e-mail link.

Meanwhile, in Sweden the Pirate Party is running in the European Parliament elections. This reminds me of Monty Python's Election Night Special.

Voice Over: And so the Silly Party has taken Luton.
Linkman: A gain for the Silly Party at Luton. The first gain of the election, Norman?
Norman: Well this is a highly significant result. Luton, normally a very sensible constituency with a high proportion of people who aren't a bit silly, has gone completely ga-ga.

Mom
Mom today had her knee replaced. That makes both knees,both ,shoulders, both hips (twice),a heart valve and cataracts on both eyes. She's an 80 year old pharmacist but in the last 5 years she's gone in for surgery every time she's about to go back to work. Get wewll soon, Mom.

SEMI - Been there, done that, with many the same thoughts running through my head. Thank you.

***

STEVE P. - Yeah, I'm watching the same pattern in myself. My grandmother, my mother, and now...

Drop a line if you want to chat.



shagin

Jonathan Head - Dreams with Sharp Teeth DVD
Jonathan:

I received my copy of Dreams with Sharp Teeth today. Nowhere on the packaging or the disc does it say that it is Region 1. Using a little piece of software on my PC to identify the actual region status of the disc, I discover that it is region-free (actually the software identifies the disc as region 1/2/3/4/5/6/8. I therefore think you WILL be able to play it in a region 4 player.

There might be a complication for you in that the video on the disc is coded as NTSC (rather than the PAL you use in Australia). Whether you get a proper picture from the disc will depend on whether your TV can handle NTSC.

I hope this helps.

Aging and ill parents
Having lost my grandmother last week, it gave me pause to study my own parents' behaviors that much closer during the memorial and funeral services--they've been divorced since I was seven, by the way. My mother, 62, repeated the same handful of stories to me at least three or four times--and she also has a speech impediment that I never noticed was that bad before, so chalk that up to a growing problem of concentration and/or a physical danger sign (she's obese, has had seven abdominal surgeries and head traumas). I only got to see my father for about an hour on the day of the memorial service. Dad, who is 82 years old (and yes, wasn't the Irish family thrilled about THAT marriage) appears frailer yet definitely has a stronger mental capacity than she and is in much better health than my mother (a lifelong runner, he still walks at least two miles per day).

I don't want to be unduly harsh in this remark, but... it gives me pause as to which parent I should sign the life insurance over to. Seriously.

Had a bit of a scare on Sunday. I was admitted to the V.A. hospital overnight with female issues you don't wanna read about here... which have yet to abate fully, so I'm in a state of low-grade panic. Even though it's definitely not a pregnancy-related problem--unless someone has seen a star in the East, as my name IS uncomfortably close to that of "Mary"--I couldn't help but lay there and think about, "What if this was a late-term pregnancy problem? And my only option was to lay here and die?"

Dr. George Tiller helped female patients with real medical problems that needed solving, many of whom had their very lives at stake because of a pregnancy-gone-wrong. When there's a problem "down there," it's a frightening turn of events that men truly cannot understand and women are desperate for help with. And screw those that think they can choose another person's options for them.

Can you name one good thing that came out of the Bush administration?

I can.

The NATIONAL BOOK FESTIVAL on the Mall, (actually initated by Laura Bush) where every summer dozens of writers appeared and spoke and signed books.

I got a chance to hear and meet Frederik Pohl, Joyce Carol Oates, Paul Theroux, and last year Salman Rushdie. There was some question as to whether this festival would survive the welcomed demise of the Bush admin but I am happy to hear that Obama & wife have agreed to sponsor it this year.

Saturday, Sept. 26, 2009

"The 2009 National Book Festival will feature about 70 award-winning authors, poets and illustrators in pavilions dedicated to book subjects ranging from history and biography to mysteries, thrillers, poetry and prose, and books for families and young people. Festival-goers can meet and hear firsthand from their favorite authors, get books signed, have photos taken with PBS storybook characters and participate in a variety of learning activities."

Matters of Health

For those of you who drop round dealing with ailing parents, my condolences. Having just returned from a visit to see my parents -- my father has Alzheimer's, and his short-term memory is like a skipping phonograph record, for those of you who remember those -- and I am dealing with similar, if less acute and critical, issues.

Hang in there.

No surprises in yahoo land: O'Reilly "stands by" what he said about Tiller and blames the "far left smear machine" who want to use Tiller's murder as a way to smear the Fox news channel and him. He is against breaking the law and justifying murder, but still thinks Tiller was a killer of babies. He asks why the far left didn't care about the 600,000 babies Tiller killed.

At least I still know I am in the real world.

Kudos to Olbermann for saying that he will no longer mention Billo. At least for now.

See how long that lasts.

Mark, ATC - Ditto to Jim Thomas' note below. I sincerely hope everything works out for the best in both of your cases. Please keep us updated.

We were happy to have my parents in town for the last few days, but for the first time I was impressed with the relative slowness with which they both are now moving, and particularly by my father's slightly hunkered gait as I watched them go into the elevators after saying goodnight last night.
__________________________________

A woman called into The Stephanie Miller Show this morning to express her outrage at Miller's criticism of O'Reilly's murder-for-hire rants. As she was explaining her argument that what Tiller's killer had done was bad, Tiller essentially deserved it. When Miller pointed out that Tiller's actions were actually legal under US law the woman's response was "NO. Not under GOD's Law".

In her mind, God's law trumps American law, and the implications of this being a widely held opinion are frightening. Limbaugh and others are fanning the flames, and her mindset is intractable.

I wonder if she knows how much she shares, philosophically, with the Taliban's enforcement of Sharia Law.

No. Probably not.
______________________________________

Woohoo for DWST's apparent success. It's about time that flick was getting some attention outside the Film Fests.

Just sayin'.

Jim Thomas:

Sounds like you got my POINT!

I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream 2: AM Rebooted!
We know that our Esteemed Host is not keen on sequels to his own work, however, that doesn't seem to stop OTHER people horning in.

J.D. Salinger is suing to stop the release of a sequel to "Catcher in the Rye".

http://tinyurl.com/mp7gsa

The only good thing I see out of this is a legitimate reissue of "Little Shirley Beans".

Brian Phillips

P.S. I saw three-quarters of DWST on Sundance, which left me impressed down to mid-quadricep. I will buy the DVD soon. Thank you, Harlan Ellison and Erik Nelson!

SOME REALLY SCARY SHIT GOING ON!
I thought the election of Prez.Obama was going to march in the introduction of a new fun loving and equality achieving reach to all politico's and an atmosphere of fair game and honesty.
I was reading a european online news site and got the low down on an American who was put on a no-fly,no-visit watch list based entirely on the words he speaks;the WORDS he speaks.I recall HE and the Spiro Agnew masturbation event and ofcourse Lenny Bruce and his push to the dark side of life.Soon the push to curve free speech on radio will be the new headline and it will not be called suppressing free thought and speech but the new PC tag will be "EQUAL TIME".I seem to remember RADIO AMERICA which even had a TV outlet and since the EQUAL hate speech couldn't sway thought of their desire it no longer was considered fair time.
I am no Constitutional scholar but it seems to me Dems. and Reps. are equal wankers of truth.Sure there are exceptions but not many I think.

Mark G, Adam T-C -- Thinking of both of you and your repective parent. My mom just recently got her one-year clean bill of health following colon cancer surgery.

Dennis C -- "total Eclipse of the Heart" had me howling; I had forgotten how cheesily over the top some of those 80s music videos were.


Rob -- Randall Terry's response to Dr. Tiller's murder is incredibly sanctimonious and self serving. As expected. He betrays himself with the line "Our actions must be equal to this crime". They see abortion as murder; you can do the math from there.


I'm currently reading Silverberg's Nightwings. For the first time. I had read just a few pages when I couldn't help but feel that my life heretofore had been more empty for my not having read it sooner (I hope that parses), for no other reason than the unbridled poetry of the man's prose.

Metastasis
With all due respect to Unca Harlan, I would submit that the most vulgar word in the English language is not "N*xon" but metastasis. It is an odd word, almost mellifluous in its enunciation, yet the implication of the word has an impact that few others can match.

On Friday, my mother was rushed to the hospital as she had become extremely jaundiced and had little energy. She recently was diagnosed as a diabetic and we thought it was related to medication related to that condition. An MRI and an ultrasound revealed a mass between her pancreas and her liver, which was affecting both organs.

The doctors will be attempting to insert an external stent (an attempt to place an internal stent yesterday was unsuccessful)then do a biopsy to determine if the mass is malignant and if it has spread. Unfortunately, this does seem the most likely outcome.

Usually, I revel in my 1,500 mile buffer zone between my family and me but right now I really wish I was back in Philly because I feel damn helpless here (I would be equally helpless there, I realize but the proximity might help)

Any good thoughts/prayers would be appreciated

Mark

Religeous f*ckwittery etc.
So, some clown thinks that his so called faith allows him to murder a doctor. His defence being that said doctor carried out abortions. Hmmmmm.

Well here is my tuppence worth.

Most of the morons who scream and shout about abortion being murder are men, in my experience. They will never have to endure the social stigma that they themselves would gladly place on an unmarried mother, as sex outside of marriage is a sin according to them. They go against every single teaching of the so called holy book they profess to uphold. They DO throw the first stone. The DONT turn the other cheek. They NEVER forgive anyone, ever. And worst of all, most reprehensible of all, they will happilly kill in the name of a "God" who teaches that killing is wrong.

Who the hell made them judge jury and executioner? They did themselves. Why? Because they cant abide people having other ideals, no matter how moral they be, because they are not "Christian" ideals. Well screw me... I dont find these dip stick morons very christian. In fact I think they are as far from christian as it is possible to be.

I have no faith at all. I do however have a strong sense of what is right and what is wrong. Abortion is, in my opinion, unfortunate but neccessary. Its not evil. Its not murder. It is simply the removal of a growth, if done within very specific time frames. Next thing these dipshits will be saying that a cancerous growth is "alive" and has rights.

Adam-Troy, first let me send my heartfelt wishes to you and your dad.

Second, let me second your opinion on Breaking Bad. This is great television. This is great anything! Anyone who is not watching this show needs to get thee to a store immediately and purchase the first season of DVD's (it's only 7 episodes, folks, you have the time!) and find a way to catch up on all 13 of this season's episodes (get thee On Demand and watch em all, as you won't want to wait for the Season Two DVD release).

This show is magical, and it is frustrating that everyone I speak to about it not only has never heard of it, but immediately wrinkles their close-minded nose when I begin to explain the concept. It's not the concept; it's the execution!!

-TODD

Argh! and Oops! That should be...
...long-drafted ranks of any deity. That is, as long as those soldiers of gods are not clutching their augmented, surrogate cocks.

(Sorry for the second posting in a day infraction. Kinda tired.)

Richard Halasz

Just as we have learned that a god can not exist without mindless supplicants, extremists can hold no sway unless they are propped up by the quiet stones in pyramid schemes. Those still and malleable servants of the slave-masters take to the lessons of 'The Lottery' like baptismal waters running over eyes that will never read Shirley Jackson.

I'd like to think that there are many 'here' who have gleaned and perhaps even honed their verbal judo skills to the point where, if needed, they could easily cow the sheep of the mandated, long-drafted ranks of any deity.

And I'm pretty sure that I am still at an age where I could easily lop off the top of the pyramid, the ugly punk who would kill a doctor. I know that there is more than enough rage in the reservoir for me to defend myself and, when needed, cause much damage to any punk. It's just one person. Were I attacked by a right-wing fomenter of violence, like O'Reilly, he would be quickly dispatched. He's just 'a' punk. He's just one punk.

However, that fight is lost when tripped up by the multitudes genuflecting, grabbing at ankles. The real complicity lies with those who are only too quick to silence between the hymns. And any of their lingering thoughts of regret or culpability are washed away by the communal wine.

I'm also at an age where I don't expect to see a separation of church and state in my lifetime. But for me, that's no longer enough. I want these motherfucking mute godlodytes off the planet. I'm not young enough to see that either. But the private sector is making great strides in space exploration while the vatican is working on another new testament to roll out to the trampled, tiered troops as soon as microbes are found out there.

Richard Halasz

Free Dirt Garbage!
Captain Ellison! I don't think I ever got a reply re: gin trash and me mailing it. Do you want free gin trash? What's it gonna be, Rosabella? Keep in mind that "no" means "yes," and "yes" means "send me nine ten-pound bags of gin trash you sexy Italian bastard."

Your Willfulness, may the butter of the gods flow down upon you and the memsahib Susanahana.

ZXM

good thoughts love and appreciation
Dear Harlan, I'm glad i checked back so soon to your 75th birthday.
Of course happy birthday! near my birthday too. I remember forgetting my birthday 20 years ago, in the new mexico desert studying chinese medicine. My wife and kids made up for it plenty, god bless them, but it was fun and funny to be in so silent a space.
You're 75 now, wow. The first stories you wrote made me feel like I was listening to my polish grandfather, someone who has lived a full life. Yer older than yer tears brother, so many love you. You have always been, sorry for the cliche, an old soul. You might have been a crazy genius punk, writer, a welcome everywhere man, running around, 20 years older than me, but you had your down time but always f**ing live wire, creative time, writing time. Thank God.
You are really impossible, and not fair to categorize. Honestly, reading some of your work as a young man made me weepy because of its breadthe and heart, and projections. Let's face it, you were never bullshitty, you wove the innocent, the dark, the really dark, and the even beautific vision looking innocently through the world as it is, tho so few see it.
There was an old chinese poem, from about 400ad, I tried to find, but it was in a book I had to let go years ago moving and moving, but as a tribute for your birthday, I'll try to remember it. It was very nice perspective of an old man, if i do a good job, and if the time feel is relaxed, I hope you enjoy;

Surrounded by guests to honor me,
her fingers touched the zheng,
and the sounds of birds,
and water moving under ice, came from her hands,
conversations and noise on the street,
and the wind and rain in the night.

I ask; who has taught her this art
lost for centuries?
Guests laugh and drink from their cups of wine,
while I, whitehaired old man
silently sit back and weep.












the eyes

Jonathan (from Sydney's) post
JONATHAN: I have it on good authority that DVD players can be "adjusted" (using merely your remote control) to become region free. Even region 4 DVD players. You have to go out on the net and search around a bit, but the instructions on how to make such adjustments are out there.
-DTS

a few laughs
Lotsa good but heavy commentary going on here, so I wanted to offer some laughs -- someone decided to deconstruct a music video, in this case TOTAL ECLIPSE OF THE HEART -- it's pretty funny even if you haven't seen the original:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lj-x9ygQEGA

"...but when ya talk about destruction,
dontcha know that you can count me out." -Lennon

only good things,
Rick

A story in the NY Times I read a couple days ago, "The U.S.S. Enterprise, in Strange New World of Museum" (http://www.nytimes.com/2009/05/30/arts/design/30star.html), mentions something it might pay to investigate. The relevant passage (describing a new ST exhibition at the Franklin Institute in Philadelphia): "And while the show’s Teacher’s Guide promises “your students will learn about an alien time portal, known as the Guardian of Forever...." Pardon me if you're already aware of this one, or if it somehow doesn't constitute a transgression, but I spotted no mention of it here -- and if this is indeed unauthorized, we may be talkin' big bucks!

Kind sir, I loved "Dreams With Sharp Teeth" last year at the Walter Reade (with you in attendance), I loved it later at the Film Forum, and I love it now on DVD. However (here it comes) ... if, as a result of its overwhelming and unprecedented popularity in the video marketplace, it becomes necessary to print more DVD sleeves, could someone PLEASE do something about the ghastly line, "Whether a die-hard Ellison fan or someone tragically uninitiated, DREAMS WITH SHARP TEETH will amuse, inspire, infuriate, and edify"? I trust we see the problem here, yes? A thousand pardons, a thousand thanks.

Oh, and (belatedly) happy birthday!

Pro-Lifers' "Solution" to Dr. Tiller's Murder

Anti-abortion messiah, Randall Terry:

"Dr. Tiller was a mass murderer.

"I grieve for him that he did not have an opportunity to properly prepare his soul to face his Maker. Unless some miracle happened, he left this life with his hands drenched with the innocent blood of tens of thousands of babies that he murdered. Surely there will be a dreadful accounting for what he has done.

"I believe George Tiller was one of the most evil men on the planet; every bit as vile as the Nazi war criminals who were hunted down, tried, and sentenced after they participated in the 'legal' murder of the Jews that fell into their hands. But even Mr. Tiller - like other murderers - deserved a trial of his peers, and a legal execution, not vigilantly justice.

"His killing presents us a severe challenge.

"The arch proponents of child killing such as Planned Parenthood, the National Organization of Women, NARAL, and a host of other enemies of children are already blaming the pro-life movement for Dr. Tiller's death.

"The child killers, and their allies in the Obama administration and on Capitol Hill, will attempt to browbeat the pro-life movement into surrendering our most effective weapons in this battle: our rhetoric, our actions, and our images.

"Pro-lifers must not flinch, waver, or in any way alter our course in our epic struggle to make child killing illegal again.

"Our rhetoric must bear witness to the truth: abortion is murder.

"Our actions must be equal to this crime: we must continue with vigorous (yet peaceful) actions such as have been used by every social revolution since America's birth. The easiest picture to have is that of the civil rights activists of the 1960s. They held 'illegal' marches, freedom rides, and 'sit-ins' at lunch counters; they were met with water canons, dogs, police brutality, arrests, and jail. If we are going to end child killing, we must unflinchingly adopt the strategies of heroes past.

"Our images must reflect the truth. We must continue to show the victims' bodies that we have pulled out of dumpsters; we must not retreat a single inch from showing the decapitated heads of little boys and girls, the arms and legs that were suctioned or carved out of their mothers wombs; we must paint the picture of sewers and landfills being used as unholy graves for these holy victims.

"Of course we are peaceful; that is why this horrific shooting in a church has immediately garnered national attention. It is precisely because we are peaceful that Dr. Tiller's killing sticks out like a huge wart on an otherwise flawless complexion. If abortionists were gunned down every week, it would gather no more attention than crack dealers who are gunned down every week."

Justice For Bill O'Reilly
Here is how the scenario should play out; When the accused shooter is brought to trial, Bill O'Reilly is subpoenaed to appear as a material witness. It doesn't matter which side calls him.If the shooter's lawyers plan an affirmative defense, then the State of Kansas calls him to affirm that he wasn't calling for Dr. Tiller to be killed. If the defense tries for diminished capacity, O'Reilly has to disavow - under oath - many of the most vicious things he said about Dr. Tiller. In either case, Bill will be subject to cross-examination. Think of it - Bill O'Reilly on a witness stand in a court of law, udner oath and subject to perjury, having to disclaim that he has any more influence on his audience than a beer commercial - this could be better than A FACE IN THE CROWD.

Copy of "Troublemakers"
Please let me know if you have a copy of "Troublemakers" available. My oldest son reads voraciously and I figured it's time he gets introduced to HE.

- Keith

PS: I'll probably show him the Wesleyan video sooner or later.

RESPONSE TO RICK WYATT

The essay came in today. You know I share your feelings. Heaven knows, been there, done that. A friend's arm across your shoulder. And a long hug.

Harlan

Various
My father is barely coherent beneath all the painkillers. He managed a weak "hello" to me, on the phone, and asked me what my "plans" were (whatever that meant). My Mom said it was the most sense he'd made all day. Things are still up in the air. I have been discouraged from heading up north, but may make the trip in a week or so. I have deadlines to deal with, before then.

*

Two cool web-things.

"Cool Guys Don't Look at Explosions," a hilarious celebration in song of one of the more prevalent action-movie cliches.

http://www.mtv.com/videos/misc/395483/2009-mtv-movie-awards-digital-short-explosions.jhtml#id=1611659#id=1611659

5 of the damnedest minutes of ballet you'll ever see. Worth checking out even for ballet-haters. An argument in favor of our species.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LnLVRQCjh8c

*

Bill O'Reilly called the abortion doc a "murderer" in 28 separate reports. What do you think the odds are that he'll show ANY remorse whatsoever for what amounts to calling for his death?

*

With the final two episodes of this season, BREAKING BAD crossed the line from best tv show on the air right now, to one of the greatest tv series of all time: a true work of art, a timeless portrait of the appeal and banality of evil. The final ep included a jump-cut, from the bed of one beloved daughter to another, that was by itself one of the great artistic flourishes of all time.

Gobsmacked
Josh, thank you for sharing the birthday tale. With the ensemble cast you recruited, I can only imagine that Harlan would be tickled silly -- and the pictures cemented that suspicion. (I like The Shield too, and miss it terribly.) That you keep this off of YouTube is further evidence that you are true and respecting friend to HE.

Barber, that would be a good opening line for a short story or book:

"I was standing in the museum, looking at the pastoral Degas, when I suddenly heard a gunshot. The killer got away, running into the painting, hiding behind a flowering thing. I stepped away from the image in disgust. You can think nature will absolve you of your crimes, but nature just holds you in contempt"

-------

Roger, you are a sweet guy, but if you want a PC room you walked into the wrong one.

-------

Randall Terry, of Operation Rescue, said it was too bad that Tiller didn't find Christ in time. Sick fucks the lot of them.

-----------

O'Reilly will sneer and find some oblong box to put his guilt into. Guys like that never look in the mirror, they always look for someone behind them with a knife.

George Haberberger--

You can't put everything into one documentary. And most of what you ask about is readily available elsewhere. And the rest of it can be found if you look hard enough.

Crap.


"removed from Christianity and "family values". They are theological hypocrits, personified.

O'Reilly ought to be charged with accessory to first degree premeditATed murder."

Anyone know where to find a secondhand editor, cheap?

Despite a wonderful weekend with the parents -- including my first trip ever to the Norton Simon Museum (who knew they have a substantial Degas collection???) -- I am really depressed with the reports across the globe that point to our continued decline as a species. (Doesn't THAT sound all old fart and such.)
_________________________________

Doctor Tiller. My only solace is that the God his murderer reputes to believe in would wildly condemn his actions. The man who took the doctor's life is far below contempt, as are the people who -- knowingly or not -- contributed to a state of mind so far removed from Christianity and "family values", are theological hypocrits personified.

O'Reilly ought to be charged with accessory to first degree premedited murder.
____________________________________

General Motors is bankrupt. Despite the claims of the detractors, the cars they make really do compare favorably with imports -- it's the PR department who has done a poor job. I'm no fan of large corporations (I work for one), but feel for the 20,000 people who will now be unemployed.
____________________________________

Michael Steele, the endlessly out of touch Chairman of the GOP has declared that the party is done with apologizing for the actions of its past. Fair enough. Now begin apologizing for the actions of the present and we'll be square.
____________________________________

Somewhere over the Atlantic 220 passengers met an untimely end for their flight from Rio to Paris. A shocking loss, and a fate which every passenger who has ever encountered turbulence lives in fear. I would prefer to believe they are on an island in the South Pacific introducing themselves to a man named Ben.
____________________________________

Monday, June 1. Can I please, all Dorothy Gale-like, wake to find myself back at the Norton Simon, comfortably seated, looking quietly at a pastoral Degas?

For those keeping score at home...
"Dreams With Sharp Teeth", a film about a man who hates computers and mobile phones with an equal passion, is currently the TOP selling doc on ITunes, perfectly designed and easily synchronized for IPhone playback.

Ah, irony.....

Studio 360
Since it wouldn't be fair to let Jan and "Clipping Service" to do all the not-so-heavy lifting, here is a link to an interview Harlan did for STUDIO 360 on 05/08/08. There is a downloadable .mp3 format excerpt clocking in at around 4 minutes as well as the full 55 minute jobber.

http://www.studio360.org/episodes/2009/05/29

This may have been posted last year but since all of their interview links are not active at all times, in the words of Janis Joplin, "better get it while you can."

************************************************************

And since anybody can say nice shit about a guy ON his 75th birthday, allow me to say we're STILL glad you're here Uncle Harlan. Well, most of the time.

***********************************************************

C'mon Josh, edit out the BURN NOTICE spoiler and post that video. Take the sting out of a suck-ass news week.

- Barney

DWST Review at DVD Verdict is up
http://www.dvdverdict.com/reviews/harlanellison.php

Harlan, I will try to get those hard copies in the mail this week, but the wife is out of town for the next two weeks, and I'll be flying solo with the boys, so I might be a tad distracted.

Question about Dreams with Sharp Teeth DVD
Hi, is there anyone here who could help out this long-time reader, once-in-a-blue-moon contributor? I’ve got a question about the Dreams with Sharp Teeth DVD; specifically, is there any hope that it might be region-free? (Both of the DVD players at my disposal only do region 4.)

I realise that this is a bit of a long shot, since despite searching desperately online I haven’t found any indication that this is the case. In fact I’d given up, asking myself ‘How long’s the movie – ninety-something minutes. It can’t be that good then, I mean, how much Ellisonian delight and adventure can they really pack into ninety-something minutes – hardly any, right?’ (This young man often uses denial to cope with the disappointments that life intermittently lobs in his direction)

But then I saw the illicit YouTube clip reported a few posts previously and realised I had to ask, because it would be worth sounding a bit desperate if I got to see just one minute of this film, let alone ninety-something of them.

Thanks,
Jonathan

I made it through ConCarolinas
I did well on the panels I was assigned (no one got slapped, despite several temptations), I sold all 15 books I took, met several good writers (and one jerk). I'm exhausted (next year, I get a room) but I had a blast. I eagerly await an invite back.

Thanks to all the folks who offered advice and encouragement.

Dreams With Sharp Teeth
I finally saw "Dreams With Sharp Teeth" last night and while I enjoyed it and don't regret buying the DVD, I thought it wasn't as comprehensive as it could have been. The documentary gave some screen time to "The Oscar" which supposedly torpedoed Harlan's movie writing career, but never mentioned, "A Boy and His Dog." Also not mentioned was his stint as the writing supervisor for 80s version of The Twilight Zone. That show used a number of his stories, specifically "Shatterday" and "One Life Furnished in Early Poverty" and "Paladin of the the Lost Hour". And it was revealed that he has a sister he hasn't spoken to since his mother's funeral, but no explanation of why. I realize that that may be a private matter, not for fandom speculation, but then why even include it if it wouldn't be explained?

Extra stuff
Mr. Sherman,

I was an extra on "Purple Rain" way back when in Minneapolis. Long days, one skimpy box lunch, closed set so you couldn't leave, had to dress and act like it was summer in the dead cold of winter for the outdoor shots (we held cigarettes to cover the visible breath).

Does that sound like fun to you? Really?

One day one of the sets at First Avenue collapsed so the billeted us all at an old theater across the street. Local musicians, also extras, spontaneously put on a talent show. This was exceedingly cool. During a lull, somebody mummified a guy who had fallen asleep in his seat with rolls of toilet paper. We thought his was pretty funny. Then somebody ignited the paper with a cigarette lighter. I was in the balcony but I remember quite clearly a concerned citiizen waking the guy up saying, "Dude! You're on fire!"

Ahhhh. Good times, good times.

A Transcendent Weekend
Dear Mr. Ellison et al.:

As to receiving the news of the murder of Dr. George Tiller, all I might say is that "Bleeding Kansas" still bleeds. As Dr. King stated about the time I was born, actually, "An eye for an eye leaves everyone blind."

On Saturday, visited Lowell, MA, to apply to work as an "extra" during filming, later this year, of a film project entitled "The Fighter". Starring Mark Wahlberg and Christian Bale, the film would be a biopic of local pugilist Mickey Ward. Producers looked for "Irish types" to fill a bar (naturally) for a few scenes. So, what the heck? Knowing the population of the Pavilion, any anecdotes about work as "extras"?

After dropping off the application, with time to kill, I traipsed down the "Kerouac Trail", visiting landmarks related to my second-most favorite Massachusetts-based writer--Hawthorne wins by ten lengths, with Thoreau/Emerson tied for show money. Ended at his gravesite, where I saw something very touching. Instead of the usual bric-a-brac left by idolators past--empty beer and liquor bottles--recent visitors left pens, impaled into the ground, just in front of the bottom perimeter of Mr. Kerouac's head plate. Naturally, I, finding a dead pen in my truck, impaled said accordingly. What a nice tribute. (When the time comes to visit Mr. E.'s final resting place, I'll place fragments, from an old Olympia typewriter, still in my attic, and shrapnel, from an M203 grenade, I collected from R.O.T.C. To allow his spirit to stay in character, of course.)

Mr. Castro: sorry about your father. Said a prayer on his behalf at Mass yesterday for Pentacost. Today marks the completion of my own dear father's 66th year on this "spinning piece of solar driftwood". Mom also turns 66 in August. My brother and I had the idea, to celebrate, that we'd drive them both the entire westward length of the old Route 66, from Chicago to L.A., this fall or next spring. Am looking for a CD collection of the old "Route 66" television series for their anniversary in August. (I remember that our dear host wrote a few episodes, so will pay especial attention for those.)

Oh, yeah. On Sunday, at 1 p.m., E.D.T., finally watched "Dreams with Sharp Teeth" on Sundance. Tres magnifique. Congratulations to Erik for producing it, and to Mr. E. for living it.

Off to replace a garbage disposal.

Regards,

William Sherman
Boxford, MA

Harlan/Erik: "Excerpt about Television in America from Dreams with Sharp Teeth" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mkWnmKEvgqg (4:44 min) posted by "hpaulmoon". Asking him to delete it unless he asked for permission.

moving right aong
Unless, of course, the children of that hypothetical Christian run into someone that agrees with your rather peculiar sense of ethics, eg?

KOS

Outrages Great and Small
_Salon_ has an angry piece about the campaign waged by Bill O'Eeilly against Dr. George Tiller, who was murdered the other day in his church in Kansas. O'Reilly, whose ignorance, stupidity, and craven evil really needs no more proof at this point, has spent 28 episodes of his show decrying Tiller as a Nazi baby-kiler who performed abortions almost as a fetish.

http://www.salon.com/news/feature/2009/05/31/tiller/index.html

There are more than enough annoying questions here, the least of which is "Why is a hateful, violent-midned, delusional thug like Bill O'Reilly allowed on the airwaves?" Or, more to the point,"Why is Bill O'Reilly allowed to live?" This is a question that indicates a severe problem with our culture. Bill O'Reilly can spend hours of airtime smearing a doctor as the moral equivalent of a Nazi, a terrorist, or Charles Manson, and when one of his viewers takes him at his word and murders the man, O'Reilly will bear no responsibility. One would have to be brain-damaged to _not_ know that there are anti-abortion creeps with weapons and a deep desire to use them on humans, so O'Reilly is-- by any reasonable standard-- well aware that, eventually, someone would go gunning for Tiller. In fact, someone already _had_, years ago. But O'Reilly will insist he bears no responsibility for the man's murder, and he won't face a moment of inconvenience over the matter.

But if you or I were to organize a similar campaign against Bill O'Reilly-- say, if we were to promote an image of him as the worst human being since Stalin-- I'm sure we'd have legions of morons, and maybe some law enforcement people, knocking at our doors and asking us why we're trying to get this shithead killed. Let me spell this out. Bill O'Reilly can incite murder, with impunity; few others have this privilege.

So let me make this absolutely clear. If someone were to murder Bill O'Reilly tomorrow, I would agree that it was a bad thing to do. But that's only because I have a sense of ethics and morality. If someone _were_ to murder Bill O'Reilly tomorrow, he'd deserve it, and I wouldn't shed a tear for his worthless carcass. But I'd have to admit that it would be _wrong_. It'd be morally fitting, sure, and satisfy my contempt for the man, and amount to a rough form of justice... but I would not support it. All I ask is that the ability to incite murder _not_ be granted to right-wing fuckheads.

And while we're talking about privilege... well, I don't want to hear Christians yelping about how insulting it is when we denounce them, because of the "radical few" who inflict violence. A handful of Muslim fanatics wiped out several million square feet of Manhattan office space... and we spent a few years wondering if that entire religion encouraged horrific violence against infidels. Christian maniacs murder doctors in this country... and Christians really _never_ have to worry about the government keeping an eye on them because of their religion.

The issue of Christian privilege ties in with other measures of privilege. As a white male, I have some advantages that others who aren't don't. (I don't feel _bad_ for having these, but it'd be dishonest to deny them.) And in discussions of privilege, there are many checklists and questions available that illuminate what can be hidden areas. For example, if you can say "I do not have to educate my children to be aware of systemic racism for their own daily physical protection," that's not a bad indicator that you've got something of an advantage.

I should mention that there are _lots_ of these checklists for a _lot_ of groups. Many are created in response to others, so there can be a flavor of oppression-one-upsmanship. Also, the questions range from profound to really trivial issues; after a while, one expects to see items like "I do not have to worry about insulting stereotypes of my ethnicity on breakfast food packaging." But there's always a core of important stuff at work here.

At http://www.tanenbaum.org/christian_privilege.pdf, you can find a nifty discussion of Christian privilege. The checklist included here is of mixed usefulness, however. It will certainly make it clear to non-Christians that Christians enjoy profound privileges. But part of an ethnic or religious identity now requires a belief in one's own oppression. For example, if you ask Christians if they believe that "I do not need to educate my children to be aware of religious persecution for their own daily physical and emotional protection," many would _disagree_, since they'd regard the teaching of Evolution, or even the separation of Church and State, as a form of persecution.

But one useful question might be this: "If the news reports on a fanatic of my religion committing a murder, I do not have to worry about others suspecting me or my entire religion of murderousness."

Dr. George Tiller
Ah shit - I've seen Dr. Tiller lecture several times at my professional conferences, and this is terrible news indeed. I don't know what to say. I hope at the very least that a national dialogue is triggered by this crime. It's truly shameful to see what state this country is still in in 2009. I think he had a couple of younger doctors he was training, so I hope someone takes over his clinic and keeps it going.

Dima

To clarify my directive.
What I mean is I feel the compassion in your voice Harlan not the maniacs that gun down unarmed people.We are delivered as sheep to the slaughter.I know your anti-gun stance which is very passionate but not in step with history of settling the Frontier which I think we have slowly drifted back into lawless maniacal states of viciousness.I don't own a gun and don't want one but I feel a degree safer knowing my neighbor or the table next to me in a restaurant might come to my aid if a lunatic brandishes a weapon.I say that knowing UK have data confirming safety of no guns allowed policy but they and us are very different in our makeups of society at large.I am for assault weapons and explosives removed from back alley sales.Certainly I am for gun manufacturers to be sued for their products when they are in the wrong hands of criminals;this may be the only way to guarantee tracking conformity from these greedy swines.Would you not agree if criminals about to commit a violent crime suspect there might be a show down with another gun most will move to another opportunity less dangerous?

Florida turning into the New Centurians.
I feel the compassion of the madness Harlan.In florida the back log of gun permits are 8 months behind and growing.The State tried once before to encourage home owners to apply and take part in defense of neighborhoods but before they realized the corruption they stirred up the organized crime elements of Tarpon Springs and Tampa especially had already applied three fold over common citizens the law was aimed at.I myself carry Shuriken Stars in a leather case for those special public gatherings;better something than nothing.

Second Post Without Apologies

HARLAN - You mean the murder that has lead certain pro-life supporters to wish God's graces and presence for Dr. Tiller's family and friends, but not for the doctor himself?

I am pro-choice. I chose not to have an abortion, and I chose to support women's health and rights the world over.


Sandra

Frank why do you make such ridiculous comments when you know there are those of us it does hurt? No wonder you have to apologize so often.

The murder of Dr. George Tiller is more ghastly and nauseating a denunciation of the putrescent "pro-life" monsters than a sane mind can contain.

Harlan

I'm running out of wall space.
Just found my ebay purchased set of Gustove Dore' prints of E.A. Poes RAVEN at the P.O. Box. Life is good,very good.
Now if I can only find the original over size RAVEN publication from 1800's life would be cherry indeed.

KATE:

Your post, glistening with toasted-just-right goodwill, hit me at precisely the nanosecond it would do optimum good. A very special thankyou back atcha, as I dimple prettily and curtsey.

Yr. Pal, Harlan

Casual Ellisonisms
Harlan Ellison is now a pick-up line. I took the boys to the park after school one day last week and Young Jackanapes made the acquaintance of a girl his age. They chased, teased, and flirted outrageously and I gave them their space out of respect for YJ's "manliness, Mom". Ahem...

And what should I hear in passing as I walked to the parking lot? "Yeah, I'm in the seventh grade, I write science fiction mainly. Do you know Harlan Ellison? I write stuff like he does. He's a friend of mine."

***

I let my brother listen to "the chandelier story" from one of the volumes of On The Road With Ellison (the exact volume escapes me at the moment). He was by turns horrified, amazed, and disgusted. "Do people really believe that shit? I mean, didn't anybody stop to think that if he even managed to do that they'd throw his ass in jail?"

***

I'm rereading "Xenogenesis" (Gah! Am I guilty of the same insensitivity in the name of good intentions?). It brought to mind a recent phone conversation with a musician friend of mine who railed at obsessive fans who shouted out punchlines during shows, who helpfully told how they copied his albums to "share" with friends, and called him in the wee hours of morning to tell him ideas for songs.


shagin

And the world goes a little more nuts...
Doctor George Tiller is dead. Gunned down at church, with his wife nearby. Talk about racking up the sins, baby--the killer aborted God in favor of man's justice. The very institution that anti-abortion advocates rely on to support their stance, and the moral and religious groundwork of their arguments, has now been turned into just another killing field. Go humans go.

God. Or G_d, if you prefer. Or IHVH, JHVH, YHVH, JHWH... or, get this: apparently the Catholic church is saying that you can't use the name "Abba" verbally. That's too sacred to utter. Pity the Swedish pop group from here on out.

Back in L.A. now. Grandma's funeral went well, with the usual moments of dark humor that those of Irish descent embrace. I'll spare you the details on a few things (you might be eating right now). But she chose to be buried with her head to the East, whereas Grandpa rests in the opposite direction next to her--need I remark on what two numbers came to mind in regards to their respective positions? Huh. And here, I never thought them to be kinky...

And Susan and Harlan, a HERC request is on the way.

A joke for the room. This may send me to hell:

I now have doubts that Christ was in fact a carpenter. He never nailed anything, but later got nailed.

Dreams With Sharp Teeth
G'day folks, just wanted to jump in for a few and say that my copy of Dreams arrived from Amazon yesterday. I waited a whole 24 hours to watch it, just so I could share the experience with my wife. Well, now that I've watched it, I've come to a starting realization: Harlan Ellison is my Wife!!!!!!!!!
I knew fate had something strange in store for me, it had to. I've been a fan as far back as High School. I've read the Man and listened to the Man; once I even saw the Man in person and am pretty sure he made use of the meeting in a Scifi Buzz commentary several weeks later. I've loved the Man, pretty much held him in as much esteem as any human can hold another, but it was only after watching the documentary that I became aware that my wife is everything that I've loved and admired in Harlan all those years!
Egads, what does this mean for me now? She's vocal and good-hearted and opinionated and viciously smart, always fighting for the underdog, never taking no for an answer, always believing that there is an answer and a Way! When Harlan mentions his 'toolbox', my wife about fell off the sofa! "That's one of my words!", she said. Yes indeed, they are so much alike. Now the hard part: after seeing Harlan topless and with a gigantic goiter, how can I ever look at her the same way again? I'll just have to turn off the lights, pull up the covers and pray her neck doesn't brush up against me in the dark. Oh, by the way, the documentary was all I'd hoped for and more. Much like the Man himelf. Loveya Harlan.

Various
Thanks, folks. My Dad is still out of it, but news is encouraging.

*
HARLAN, SUSAN, ERIK: I deeply hesitate to report this, but I just heard Judi screaming in rage from the next room, as the Sundance title card for the next feature, "Dreams With Sharp Teeth," included the subtitle, "Robin Williams + Neil Gaiman = Trekkies." Owwwww.

Hi, Harlan and all folk here. Glad you had a good day. Honest Native Americans, guys, I mess up my siblings BDs half the time. Just seem to know my best friend's Monica's and Harlan's well. Monica's because she had the foresight to be born on the fourth(which is my date) a mere five months after me. And Harlan's because back in the day, when I was youngerer than now, I had a thing for astrology, and his was a BD I looked up. I mean like 20 years ago, when I was young and my heart was an open book, etc. Older now, not necessarily wiser. Nor yet a better speller.
On a serious note, ATC, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your father. Crossing fingers of both hands and feet as well.
The reason I was on Gabriel Byrne's web site t'other day, (now reverting to ancestor's Irish accent,) I finally saw In Treatment, the HBO series, and I love it. Does anyone else here watch? Any opinions anyone wants to share?
Finally, Barney, David, Harlan, anyone else, HELP!!!! Am still reading Brothers Karamazov, but am having really hard time. There are parts, sometimes whole chapters that are beautiful and enthralling; but there are these other whole chapters that just set my teeth on edge. And I am having a really rough go at relating to or liking any of the characters. Want to slap most of them silly. Think I might like the father best. So what? Do I like have no reading skill now? Was that bump on the head in March just the one too many? I told my doc brain surgery was not good for one. Seriously, I'm not kidding. If I can't get through this book, and find redeeming factors in it, I think maybe I should forget the whole writing thing. Maybe the teaching of literature thing too. Moby Dick was difficult, but at least I liked it, the characters, could sorta grasp the symbolism and stuff. Not working with BK. Loved Crime and Punishment.
Anyways, best love and wishes to all. Diane.
Please let us know about your dad, ATC. DB

My dvd of Dreams With Sharp Teeth was received and has been watched completely through the first time. This is a fascinating work about Harlan which I enjoyed immensely. Thank you Harlan for allowing this to be done warts and all.

Email campaign to sway the outcome with thousands of voices:
Not intended or suggested.Just me and my subscription voiced outrage.Second only to Fangoria not including a new interview with HE in retrospective of recent.But looking back would have been kinda cool if the Editor came in after M-Day found system over load with kindly criticism ending with "but we love ya'".
B-Day greetings.

Pixar's "Up", as in Two Thumbs Up.
Laurie and I saw "UP" this morning and we loved it!

Sure, there was a willing suspension of disbelief, but this film contained many of the same tender and heart rending moments which made "Paladin of the Lost Hour", "It's A Wonderful Life", and "Day of the Dolphin" exceptional. Laurie and I both cried during the first ten minutes and we choked up several times through out the film. And we laughed. . .we howled during several spots in the film. This is a film about life and living, death and dying, and all of the ups and downs in between.

The voice cast is wonderful with Ed Asner as the curmudgeonly Carl Fredricksen, Christopher Plummer as the megalomanical Charles Muntz, and newcomer Jordan Nagai as Russell. Co-director and screenplay writer, Bob Peterson also supplies the voices of dogs,Dug and Alpha.

We both recommend "UP" for ages 9 to 99.

http://disney.go.com/inside/mainattraction/090528/index.html

Adam-Troy Castro:

I know where you're coming from. I hope your dad comes out of this without any lasting effects. Good thoughts sent his way and yours.

Chuck

...and, no, I DON'T mean "STAUNCH". When I say "stout", I mean STOUT!

Regardless of ANYTHING one might say about Bill Maher, the man surpassed himself this week on HBO's Real Time with his monologue about American Greed, the commodity redefined and repackaged by the Reagan era, and blindly perpetuated by Conservatives since then...at our de facto discredit as a "good people".

It was absolutely goddamn brilliant! SO eloquently on-the-mark!

I've become a STOUT Bill Maher fan!

an array of topics

JOSH:

GREAT photos of the old -- uh, I mean -- The Man.

Our second and final performance of "Plan 9 From Outer Space" last night was a smash. The old Hollywood Theatre was nearly filled, the music was fantastic, and we voice actors rocked. The one drawback of a project like this (lip-synching dialogue to a movie) was that you couldn't hold for laughs, so there were a number of times when the audience was roaring and my or somebody else's followup line got completely deluged.

The new original score (string quartet and various electronica) is truly wonderful. Often very witty. We're all hoping to get at least an audio recording of last night's show. The composer told me the performance was taped and he's going to try to fit the audio to the video and see if it works, away from an audience and outside a movie house.

He said he's going to score an old Western next, but after that may come the 1939 Fleischer animation of "Gulliver's Travels," for which he'll need our talents again. Oboy.

A-TC: Fingers hereby crossed. Your father is in my thoughts, and I'm sure in the thoughts of everyone here.

Harlan: I will put a packet in the mail to you (via HERC) in the next day or two with the Star Trek-sculpture ad, an assortment of DWST reviews and ... something else I think you'll be interested in.

A-TC: Crossed fingers, warm fuzzies, and the hope that everything works out for the best.


shagin

Josh, you are a great friend, what you did for Harlan was a mitzvah and I thank you for sharing those pictures with us.

A-T C, while I have not seen the comments to which you refer, I have looked on occasion in the Talkbacks and usually end up feeling like I need a shower afterward. The comments posted on that site are especially vicious, which I find odd considering that the guys who run it are about the nicest people you would ever meet

Dapper suit there Harlan. Gore Vidal would approve.

Josh is a good friends. Having connections is a good thing at last.

A-TC
Consider our fingers crossed over here.

Shit!
Forgive the second post. I have just received word that my 79-year-old father has fallen down a flight of stairs, in his Greenwich CT home. Unlike my own tumble down an entire flight of stairs a couple of years back -- the day before the wife and I were two of the folks who got stuck in an elevator with Harlan -- this one resulted in physical injury: the old man has broken his clavicle. We are awaiting word on any lasting effects. Crossed fingers are appreciated.

Google Book Lawsuit Comment Period Extended
To October 7, and the opt-out extended to September 4.

http://www.googlebooksettlement.com/

So Google, under the terms of this settlement with The Author's Guild in the Google Book lawsuit, gets to:

1) continue to digitize Books and Inserts
2) sell subscriptions to an electronic book database to institutions
3) sell online access to individual books
4) sell advertising on pages from Books
5) make “other uses” in the future (described as the potential for “consumer subscriptions (similar in concept to the institutional subscriptions); print on demand Books; custom publishing (per-page pricing of content for course packets or other forms of custom publishing for the educational and professional markets); PDF downloads (consumers would be able to download a PDF version of a Book); and summaries, abstracts or compilations of Books.”

And the copyright holder gets “63% of all revenues received from these uses.”

Of course, being a new business model, no one in the settlement can really say yet how or when such payments would be made, or the slide rule by which they'll be calculated; and I don't see any obvious details on how Google proposes to be able to prove (via hit counts, page views, download or other web-specific stats) exactly how much a book has made under this model.

Bottom line is, if you've got a book published on or before January 5, 2009 and you hold the copyright for it, you've got a dog in this hunt; and unless you're sure you want Google as your silent partner in electronic distribution, you should take a gander at what the lawyers have cooked up and make your voice heard.

And in other notes, Neil Gaiman's reading of "The Graveyard Book" won Audies for Book of the Year and Children's Titles for Ages 8-12 last night. Huzzah!

Harlan get new Fan/Stalker!!
"Dreams" inspires viewer maybe a litttle TOO much!

The lead:

"I saw Dreams With Sharp Teeth, the documentary about Harlan Ellison, two days ago and haven't been able to stop thinking about it since. I must warn you, if you haven't seen it, that Harlan Ellison is one foul-mouthed, cranky old man. If that's not your thing, don't watch.

For me, I think I'm in love.

First of all, I've heard of Harlan Ellison, but haven't yet read any of his work. He recited some of it in the film, and now I have to go out and spend my rent money on all of his writings...."

The rest:

http://tinyurl.com/muqvx7

Coupla various
JOSH: ya done gude, man.

EVERYBODY: If you do go over to Aint-It-Cool News to read Harry Knowles's comments on DREAMS WITH SHARP TEETH (part of his video roundup for the last week of May), do yourself a favor and avoid the talkback section, where a number of halfway respectable pro-Ellison comments are overwhelmed by the usual assortment of trolls who do things like trash him at length while bragging that they barely know who he is. (My "favorite" of the bunch: one who notes Harlan's age at his recent birthday and chortles uproariously.) While I do read Aint It Cool, I have avoided the Talkbacks for years, since realizing the kind of personality that predominates there, and I deeply regret succumbing to curiosity this time. Avoid, avoid, avoid.

a dream combination
JOSH:

Ahh...any intersection of the *Burn Notice* personalities and Harlan could only yield strange, fun and wonderful stuff... the idea of which makes the metaphorical mouth water. what a genius gift!

JOSH,

You have indicated more than once that you feel fortunate to have a friend like Harlan, and I'm sure no one here would disagree. But I think it also needs to be said that Harlan is lucky to have a friend like you. From the great Parisian Impeca hunt to this extraordinary video gift, you have given many a smile to our beloved Unca Harlan, and for that we owe you a debt of gratitude. As they say downunder, good on ya, mate.

Steve J.

JOSH - The pictures do credit to the gift. Bravo!

***

STEVE - Because they raised a son as well mannered and thoughtful as themselves.


shagin

DAVID RAY - D'oh! It was a long rough day. "I plead stupid your honor". Natch I meant you.
___________________________________

JOSH - Thank you for posting those shots. What a wonderful gift you and Patton gave him.

(I always wondered what Harlan's expression would be when he discovered APPLE computers.)
___________________________________

My folks are in town. Just had dinner with them at our favorite Mexican restaurant. I got good parents. Why they ended up with ME is the subject of considerable speculation however.

Gobsmacked!
There's a photo suitable for framing--it appears that video was what so many strive to find/create yet seldom do... the perfect gift.

Only the best to Mr. Harlan Ellison!

Dreams Wtih Sharp Teeth on Netflix
Can anyone tell me when the DWST DVD will be available on Netflix?

By the way HE- I still have a copy of the new Incarceri 9 album with your name on it (literally) if you want a copy.
-Jordan

Josh,

Bruce "Evil Dead" Campbell reading Dream Corridor? Bruce "Evil Dead" Campbell readi -

My brain just exploded.

Thanks for the two photographs, Josh. HE is looking quite dapper.

K.

Harlan & Patton's B-Day Wish
Thank you, Josh, for posting the info on Harlan's birthday. I'm glad he had a good time.

And I can finally say that I was in the crowd for Patton Oswalt's concert & shout-out to Harlan (but Patton asked us to keep it a secret). I can relax now.

Thanks for the Pictures, Mr. Olson.
Dear Mr. Olson,

Just perused your photo gallery, especially the snaps of our dear host. Most poignant, especially those of Mr. & Mrs. Ellison. Tres bon.

Regards,

William Sherman
Boxford, MA

Christ. The pictures YOU'RE about to see. YOU'RE.

It'd be lovely if this site had an edit feature...

I need to set up the pictures your about to see....

For Harlan's birthday, Patton and I put together a seven minute video that we presented to Harlan on DVD. After our little dinner, I pulled out my laptop, slapped some headphones on our pal, and showed it to him. And what it was was this -

A ridiculous bit of ad libbery with the two of us introducing clips of various and sundry notables wishing Harlan a happy birthday. This video will never end up on YouTube, so you'll just have to take my word that it was pretty spiffy. On the disc are the following:

First off, Patton recently shot an HBO special, and he got the entire crowd to wish Harlan a happy birthday.

Then we went to Walton Goggins, the brilliant actor who played Shane on The Shield, a show Harlan loved.

Then we went to my friend, the rockstar Otep (from the band of the same name, and who Harlan adores), then we went to

Are you sitting down?

Judge Judy.

Then we got Chris Pine, cos Harlan loves him some Star Trek.

And then we got the piece de resistance:

With the help of the wonderful Matt Nix, we got the cast of Harlan's favorite show, Burn Notice to do a little video in which Jeffrey Donovan does a quintessential Burn Notice monologue about the value of a good short story, and what a great spy Harlan would make, which ran over shots of him, Gabrielle Anwar and Bruce Campbell reading Dream Corridor. This concluded with Donovan revealing something about next season that will amuse you all when you see it, and which further knocked Ellison for a loop.

So if you go to the link below, you'll see two pictures. The first is Harlan reacting to the video, and the second is the stunned expression he had on his face for the next ten minutes, during which he didn't speak even once.

If you've ever wonder what a gobsmacked Ellison looks like, or Ellison with his mouth closed.... go here:

http://gallery.me.com/josholson#100229

Happy birthday, my friend. It is a privilege and a pleasure to know you.

TO ALEX KRISLOV
.
James Elroy's crime novel BLOOD'S A ROVER is the final volume of his American Underworld Trilogy. The book's title is taken from the poem titled "Reveille" by the English scholar and poet A.E. Housman:

Clay lies still, but blood's a rover;

Breath's a ware that will not keep.

Up, lad; when the journey's over

There'll be time enough for sleep.

Great minds and all that…

Dry Mouth? Silence you? I don't think so!
The Universe might be challenging you, Mr. Ellison, but it will never tell you to shut up.

We may not say it often enough, but you know we treasure you. Even those of us who read, but seldom post. I hope you realize how much your stories have meant to so many of us.

It will be a long time before the Universe will wish to silence such an astute and compassionate and stringent observer of life.

Gosh, I hate suck-up posts, so I'm heading back to lurking. But once every great while, you have to tell someone that you think they are rather grand. Especially around their birthday. ...just in case, they don't realize how much we esteem them.

Blood's a Rover
Harlan -- first, a belated happy birthday. May you have dozens more!

Secondly, I'm at the BEA, and ran across mention of a new James Ellroy book called "Blood's a Rover." I know titles can't be copyrighted, but I found it unnerving, and thought I'd pass it on.

Be good!

Reply
To Jeff R. 1) Yes 2) he's in Paoli Hospital, long story, should be out today. JZ

For John Zeock:
The three Jane Radolph films to which you referred are:
CAT PEOPLE
CURSE OF THE CAT PEOPLE
ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET THE CAT PEOPLE... er. MEET FRANKENSTEIN,
right?

By the way, John, have you heard anything about Steve Friedman recently?

Dry mouth
Harlan,

I'm not usually one to pimp products, but something that may ameliorate your dry mouth discomfort is a product called "Biotene". It's available in toothpaste, mouthwash, spray, gel, gum, and liquid forms. Your local Walgreens or CVS pharmacies should carry it.

They also have a website (through which, healthcare providers can obtain free samples); http://www.biotene.com/


Cheers,
Andrew

Jazzy heads-up
Harlan, Barber and anybody who loves the genre: March 17 saw the release of Bebo and Chucho Valdes' album "Juntos para siempre," the first full length collaboration between father and son and their first together in a recording session since that beautiful moment in "Calle 54" when they shares the stage together. Haven't bought yet, it's on my "must acquire next" list but I wanted to give you guys and gals, twistoes and twistettes the heads-up. Any recording that unites these two piano giants must be worth its weight in gold.

REPLIES

JIM THOMAS and MICHAEL RAPOPORT followed by ALL THE REST OF Y'ALL:

Jim: Yes, by all means, send 'em to HERC. Trying to keep up with all of this jiggery-pokery now that DREAMS has hit the wider plateau, is akin to being the Head Wrangler at the marabunta incursion. So whatever you (or anyone else) can take down--with logos thereon to establish provenance--will be more than slavishly appreciated. Sent to HERC, is a golden thankyou.

Michael: I believe I've seen the card in question. And, again I believe, I let it pass only because I saw no "City" teaser on it. It may just be that they didn't include "City" on this blow-in come-on, because its potential value was unknown to them or...Paramount may have steered them away from a "City" presence because of the looming lawsuit. Send it if you feel like it, but if not...no harm, no foul.

The birthday went softly, as I wished it to go. Pals Patton Oswalt, Josh Olson, and J. Michael Straczynski (with Susan, Vanessa and Kathryn) hosted me at Lawry's The Prime Rib. Lovely evening, everyone smiling, good chatting, we got home about 8:30ish, and I had the first good night's sleep since Dr. John changed my medication and brought on the dreaded "dry mouth." I believe the universe could have cobbled up no more solid an omen for me at 75 than to have given me Dry Mouth. It is the universe's way of telling me to Shut The Fuck Up.

In the tally directly across from the abundantly cherished good wishes posted here by all of you.

The new short story is now at a third market since its creation, and we shall see what we shall see. I'll keep you in the loop.

Yr. Pal, Harlan

Wood(en) topic

KOS:

I can't imagine the chances are very good, since the show is tonight. I would imagine the organizers might be interested in doing a reprise somewhere down the line (maybe this could become an annual event!), for the opportunity of a permanent record, but the logistics are going to be hellish in any case.

I passed your post up the line and will let you know if I hear anything.

doctor news and a goodbye
New companion for new Doctor-Karen Gillan (The Fires Of Pompeii). The Noble family returns for the Tenth Doctor's finale. Gillian Anderson and Chris Eccleston currently doing A Doll's House at the West End./////And someone from 3 of my favorite movies-Jane Randolph, 94.

Happy (belated) birthday, Harlan! Mine was just two days earlier.

For those of you who are interested, my review of DWST will be up at DVDVerdict.com sometime next week; a computer glitch kept it from being posted this week. It's a wonderful film; even my wife got interested, even though she hasn't read any of Harlan's stuff--though she's starting to read some now.

Harlan--you had mentioned wanting hard copies of the review for various archives. Should I just send them to the HERC address?

My wife is going to be out of town for the next two weeks, leaving me with the boys (ages 3 and 5). Pray for me. ;)

That was a rather dumb question: "why do you write so much?"

Why do I give out so much food? haha. Gotta love the media.

-------------

"Me and the geek." Don't you mean two geeks. Wink.

Rick: Thank you for the Wonders of Ellison Webderland
Yr. Pal,
Shane

David,

Somewhere Ed Wood is smiling.

And Bela is still saying, "Fuck, you, Karloff!" and laughing.

Chuck

Harlan: I have a card advertising "The U.S.S. Enterprise Collection," a series of sculpted displays of scenes from you-know-which TV series. The ad promises a "handcrafted, hand-painted and meticulously detailed U.S.S. Enterprise NCC-1701" that "serves as the perfect table-top display for dramatic, fully-sculptural scenes from your favorite Star Trek episodes."

(I found the card several weeks ago as a magazine insert - I believe the magazine in which it came was Wizard, though I could be wrong - and I thought to myself, "Mmm. Maybe Harlan would be interested in this," and I set the card aside and of course promptly lost track of it till I found it tonight. The company behind the offer is Hawthorne Village, with an address listed in Niles, Illinois.)

The ad DOES NOT display or mention anything about "City on the Edge of Forever" - it has scenes from "The Trouble With Tribbles," "The Menagerie" and other episodes. However, I recall that recently you were very eager to have another Webderlander send you a flyer advertising some other Star Trek "collectibles," because you said it would help your lawsuit.

If you want this card, I'll be happy to drop it in an envelope and send it your way. Just let me know.

HARLAN: A very very happy semisesquicentennial to you. And a HEALTHY one, dammit!

(This'll make you happy; sometime very shortly, I will be buying DWST to show to my lovely bride-to-be {the date of August 29th fast approaches}, and lead her down the pricklerose path toward corruption. I gots me some plans for that girl's mind, yup ...)

Tom M~ I only meant that even when one is part of a large company and/or corporation, our jobs can still be fragile and temporary. I blame the early hour for my nebulous and ineffable French. Glad you found the new job so quick.
-----

Thank you, Rick. That was nice.
-----

Thanx, ATC. In the parlance of my drunken gutter days, HARLAN MAN made me snort all loud and shit. That was great.
-----

DWST arrived today. This will be a nice movie to watch, so I hear. I only hope it's as good as the source material.

Hey Steve Barber, in re to:
"(Also got a chance to meet webderlander David Shane, which was cool exemplified.)"
I assume you mean me. Wonderful to have met you and Cris

David "Shane" Ray

Happy (Belated) Birthday!

To my most dearly favourite author, a very very happy (and belated) birthday! I was absolutely delighted to find that my amazon.ca order of DWST shipped yesterday, on your birthday of all fine days! I hope you had a good one, and that you continue to have many more happy birthdays to come.

~Alisha

I received my copy of Dreams With Sharp Teeth this week, the only problem was it was not from the company I ordered it from on Monday. I had preordered it from Amazon in April and totally forgot and ordered it again this week. It looks like a second copy is coming, if that happens I'll be back here and have it available. Holy buckets what a doofis.

Encore Presentation this Weekend
of Harlan's NPR Studio 360 appearance!

Details, and a listen, here:

http://studio360.org/episodes/2009/05/29

A day late: Happy Birthday, Vertical Man!

You continue to inspire. Always.

K.

Harlan: Now You've Done It!
Congratulations on passing the 3/4 century mark and entering your 76th year! May you have many more healthy years.

Best,
Shane

"After 58 years you'd think writing would get easier. It doesn't. If you're lucky, you become harder to please. That's all right, it's still a pleasure." Elmore Leonard

The Dog Ate My First Draft
Loftus: What are the chances of the "Plan 9 From Outer Space" project organizers/participants being interested in a filmed version of their performance, perhaps with "eixtra" features such as "behind the scenes" material/interviews with particpants? I know someone who might be interested in exploring such a project with "your" group.

This is very tentative, no guarantees it will go anywhere, but the interest is genuine and this is not some fan boy with a camera.

Should matters develop favorably, I will pass along any contact info.

There's likely no money in it, but it could be a dandy little film.

KOS

"Tim Treadwell lives in the Alaskan wilderness watching an old jew rant at length..."

Yes, well, your mother evidently turned the TV off before the old jew killed and ate Mr. Treadwell.

Or was that...the Travel Channel?
_________________________________

I'm thrilled we've seen a couple of people peek in and say hello, saying they'd seen DWST on SUNDANCE and it encouraged them to know more about Unca H. I kind of envy that discovery process.
_________________________________

I am sad to report that my pictures of various and sundry Orca swimming in Puget Sound were ruined by poor focus. I made the error of putting the camera on autofocus without taking boat-motion into account. Yes, an amateur mistake. F*** me. Yeah, yeah, all they would have shown was a large black dorsal fin in the water, but still...

One more notch off our NO OPPORTUNITY WASTED list.

(Also got a chance to meet webderlander David Shane, which was cool exemplified.)

what a sight

ELLISON:

Someday I wanna stand on yer shoulders. Get it on, brutha.

Love and Rockets,
Rick

Happy Birthday Harlan
Happy Birthday Harlan! Your the guy who inspired me to read books at a very young age. I questioned the world around me as a result of reading your stories.

Belated Wishes
A belated happy birthday and best wishes to Mr. Ellison. I hope your day was a good one.

Oh, and Incidentally
The Erik Nelson connection led to a bizarre, momentary brain-flash of a documentary called HARLAN MAN, in which Tim Treadwell lives in the Alaskan wilderness watching an old jew rant at length...

From AMAZON "Dreams" site
"Over 80 minutes of bonus material including: Six Bonus Harlan Ellison Readings; "Pizza with Harlan and Neil Gaiman (40 minutes); ''An Evening With Sharp Teeth'', a short on the Film's Premiere; Trailer."

Basically, with the exception of the 40 minute "Pizza" film, most of the same extras that can also be found HERE:

http://www.creatvdiff.com/harlan_ellison.php

But. 'mo betta quality, with cool menus and Harlan barking at you when you select one....

Waving, Weakly
Passing through, while traveling. Be well, all.

Whee, the DVD!

Not that it's going to make one bit of difference as to my decision to order a copy, but does anyone have a specific, complete list of the extras for "Dreams With Sharp Teeth"? Just curious.

The Oregonian has a nice story today about our "Plan 9 From Outer Space" project:

http://www.oregonlive.com/movies/index.ssf/2009/05/live_performances_add_polish_t.html

uhhh...
I never knew of Harlan until today while watching the Sundance channel. Glad I was channel surfing! Happy b-day Harlan.

Master Class....
Nice "Dreams" review, Kansas City Star.....

"An inside look at the writer, "Harlan Ellison: Dreams With Sharp Teeth" is a terrific doc about sci-fi author Ellison, a "little Jew from Ohio" regarded by many as one of the great writers of the 20th century.

Ellison is opinionated, angry and has no tolerance for morons ... meaning most everybody.

"I'm not so much smart," he says, "as I am not dumb."

But his work as a short-story writer, on episodic TV, and as a critic has won him countless awards.

Ellison is a brilliant storyteller and master raconteur. He might be impossible to live with, but in measured doses he's a tonic -- smart, quotable and wildly entertaining.

Erik Nelson's doc -- more than 20 years in the making -- captures the man in all his grumpy glory. We hear from his friends (Robin Williams, writer Neil Gaiman, "Battlestar Galactica" creator Ron Moore), who remain fiercely loyal. We see scenes from the TV shows he has written.

The DVD extras are as good as the feature, especially six short-story excerpts read by Ellison -- it's like a master class in acting.

A proud atheist, Ellison maintains that life -- this week he turned 75 -- has no meaning beyond what we give it and asserts that "Death stands at my shoulder like a salivating fan boy at a Star Trek convention." Wow.

Most of all this movie makes you want to read his stuff."

Tom Morgan--

Same word for me, I suspect. Glad to know I'm not the only twisted mind here.

Whovian goodness
Good news folks. BBC America has acquired the first broadcast rights for all five Who specials. The Next Doctor airs on June 27. See link below:

http://www.variety.com/article/VR1118004221.html?categoryId=14&cs=1

Also: Tennant is scheduled to appear in Season 3 of "The Sarah Jane Adventures" and it will not be a cameo. A full fledge Dr. Who/Sarah Jane adventure.

Birthday Follow-up
Not like we're obsessed or anything, but we'd like details on the big day -- what happened, where'd you go, what did you do?

***************************************************************

If anyone in the L.A. area is interested:
On Saturday, the Cinematheque at the Egyptian theater is showing a double bill of SON OF FRANKENSTEIN and GHOST OF FRANKENSTEIN. Ya got Karloff, Lugosi, Lon Chaney Jr., Basil Rathbone, Lionel Atwill, Dwight Frye -- what more could you ask for?

Brilliant Remark of the Month
From a co-worker: "I grasp things real fast. My problem is that I forget them just as fast as I grasp them."

Do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a straight face and nod, in the interests of maintaining peace in the workplace, when I hear such a gem? Instead of laughing in her face, I have to mumble, "Uh, well, maybe you should work on that, you know?"

Maybe I should put in for hardship pay?

Aaaah! I forgot the main thing. E-Reads is selling all their Harlan titles at 50% off. 35 or so books for $5 each. So if you need e-copies, now's a good time. http://store.fictionwise.com

Not my favorite e-mail yesterday: "DETAILS FOR SHIPPED ITEMS
... 10 - 20 BUSINESS DAY DELIVERY."

More from Blackstone: "An American Family Shakespeare Entertainment", a full cast of award-winning narrators present miscellaneous scenes and soliloquies... MACBETH read by Harlan Ellison. Published - 07/01/09.

Comicmix.com yesterday: "Harlan Ellison, who despite various attempts directed at him of annihilation, assassination, bloodshed, butchery, carnage, destruction, foul play, homicide, knifing, liquidation, lynching, manslaughter, massacring, murder, shooting, stabbing, slaying, taking out, terrorism, general mayhem, and the rest of the works up to and including editing, has somehow survived to the distinguished age of 75. Happy birthday, unkie Harlan."

I'm glad you were born.

Happy! Happy!
And many more.

A reader for 40+ years . . . good grief how the time do fly!

And extra good wishes to Thy Lady Susan for keeping thee company and in good health.

Happy Birthday, Unca Harlan!

And exactly as many more as you want. Thanks for all the stories, and we look forward to the rest of 'em.

Tad

Chiming In
It's still the Golden Day in California, right?

Just wanted to add my best wishes, Harlan, as well as my thanks for all your work and this site have done to get me through a tough year. This weekend I'll settle in with DWST and banish stress for a few happy hours.

Happy Birthday!

Candygram
Just kidding, Land Shark!

Harlan: That's one small tin of "Happy Birthday". and one giant hogshead of "Many More!"

Curl up with a good book.

I suggest something by M. de Sade.

All in the spirit of the day.

KOS

P.S.
Rick had hemorrhoids? Somehow, this explains everything...

Harlan,
Not just another well wish but also a heartfelt congratulations for managing to still live life on your terms, doing what you love to do without compromise. With all due respect to Josh, I believe it's not just the words, as fine as they are. It is also the inspiration gained from watching someone continue to walk the walk, decade after decade, whatever the cost.

Rick,
Thanks for that glimpse into the laying of the foundation of Webderland. And of course for all of your efforts since. Go Cards.

Steve Evil,
When you read that post quickly (or at least when I did) an extra letter appeared in one of the words. I won't say which one, but the sentiment was still a nice one.

Paul,
Thanks for the birthday wish. Must confess I did not manage to comprehend the rest of it however.

A good day to all here.

Oh....
....and thank you too, Mr. Erik Nelson!!!!!!!

-TODD

Happy Birthday to Harlan, Happy Gift Day To Me!
Happy Birthday, Harlan, and thanks for the gift of Dreams With Sharp Teeth DVD whose Amazon box I opened not 5 minutes ago.

Yahoooey Patootey! Now, how the hell am I going to wait all the way until Saturday Night to watch this with Debbie during DVD Movie Night At The Cassel Household? If I cheat, she'll beat my buns!

Again, Harlan, many many many good wishes on your B-Day!

-TODD

From the Great White North, "Bonne Fette et Toi!"

May your pens never run dry. .


-SD

Five hours under the wire
*** Harlan *** Happy 75th birthday. I will leave all the old man count the rings rah rah horseshit at the door. I don't know that I have woken up feeling like I was five or seven since I actually WAS that fantastic and irreplaceable age - but at 49 I know all about looking in the mirror and having discussions with the 16 year old or the 22 year old trapped down in there somewhere.

These days you would do another double-take if you saw me. I'm still shaving the dome but I decided to grow a beard and it came in like Hemingway's in that old LIFE photo - and about that gray.

It's funny (to me) because when YOU started going gray in the 1980's it depressed ME - and now, 31 years later I'm right about there - and strangely I'm fine with that. Like a silver-back gorilla flying the seniority flag, saying "whatever you want, you still have to get past me to get it, Bub."

I hope you had a wonderful day and more importantly a great week and a great year and as many more of those as you care to. Thank you for so many many things.

Happy Birthday Harlan - your pal, Barney

I hope it's been a fine day for you, Harlan, and that the view from atop your three-quarters of a century is the tremendous panorama I imagine it must be.

Best,
D.

Happy Birthday, Harlan! (From a long-ago poster kind of lurking these days.)

Also, I caught Dreams With Sharp Teeth on Sundance the other night and I almost lost it laughing at Neil Gaiman's impersonation of a Harlan Ellison phone message.

Happy birthday, Mr. Ellison! Yaaayy!

I've loved your writing since I was introduced to it 28 years ago. I love your passion, your empathy, your style and your wit.

Live long, and many, many happy days to come!

Happy Birthday
see subject of post for message.

Mr. Ellison,

Enjoy your day, this day, and look forward to at least another seventy-five more.

(Your post about my telephone call regarding the newsletter was relayed to me on the back side of Nowhere. No worries. No apologies are necessary.

My inability to discern a prank at fifty yards is my failing, and my not spending enough time with the human race does not provide excuses for me to call you at home.)

Here's hoping ypu have a terrific birthday today Harlan.

"Now?"

"Now."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. Yes, I'm sure."

"I just don't wanna go off half-cocked, early, premature, kinda like."

"You won't."

"You sure?"

Sigh. "Yes I'm sure. Do it already!"

"Okay. If you're sure."

"Yes. I'm sure. I'm positive. It's the correct date, time, year, minute, second. It's time."

"I just wanna..."

"WOULD YOU JUST FUCKIN' DO IT, ALREADY?"

"Okay, okay. Ahem. HAPPY BIRTDAY UNCA HARLAN!"

pause

"Was that alright?"

"It was poetry. One for the ages. I laughed, I cried, it became part of me."

"Gee, thanks."

"Mook."


Chuck Messer

Happy Birthday
Just caught DwST on Sundance and caught you talking in your Webderland sweatshirt. I made me miss this place a little.

Happy Birthday, sir.

Thanks for everything.

Another birthday log on the fire...
Happy Birthday, Harlan!

I, too, anxiously await your new story. Long before the Internet and knowing when new work would appear, I would frequent book stores and check the hard covers, the paperbacks and the monthly SF magazines. When there was a new Harlan Ellison story, there was a unique happiness. It's great to have that feeling again.

Many thanks, Richard.

Holy rat shit, that is disgusting.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

Enjoy your dinner tonight & remember you can still laugh, just make sure your mouth isn't full.

Happy Bithday!
Happy Birthday, Harlan... and thanks for sharing your thoughts on this crazy ride we call life... at times they've gone over my head, and at times they've touched the deepest places in my heart...but they always make me think...

HE, Happy B'day!
Just wanted to add my voice. May you feel cheery and loved as you so much deserve. I am honored at having having had the opportunity to read your work, will never stop reading and re-reading it and have not the slightest doubt it will last. And I am still delighted every time I think of meeting you at the best and classiest restaurant in my neighborhood. A very happy, happy birthday, Harlan.

Webmaster Kudos...
RICK: And for that consideration and service, not to mention many others, we thank you very much.


Sandra

Happy birthday Harlan! -- duane

The Dreadful Unknown
Finder: I run a honey pot from http://www.projecthoneypot.org/ to both keep spammers off my site and report them. The Dreadful Unknown is one of the links that bots and other automated spammer/searcher engines and tools see that most people don't. I guess it must show up on the blackberry as part of the forum header.

Anyway, don't worry about it. It's one of the reasons we haven't had cigarette or porn ads here on on the forums with any frequency in the last year.

14 Years
August 14, 1995

Rick Wyatt
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Atlanta, GA 30350
(404) 392-0353

Harlan Ellison
xxxxxxxxxxxx
Sherman Oaks, CA xxxxx

Dear Mr. Ellison,

I want to put you on the Net.

I am a longtime reader of your work. When we met at the circus that was DragonCon in Atlanta, (I was the guy from Little Rock), you said you weren’t very good at accepting compliments. I will thus spare you the relating of how your words have changed my life, dissolved my hemmorhoids, cured my dog’s mange, and substantially reduced the hole in the ozone layer. Instead, I’ll cut to the chase.

As part of my preparation for DragonCon (which mainly consisted of refreshing myself on every story in The Essential Ellison in the hopes that you would be so impressed by my Harlanian erudition that you would invite me to become a member of some Masonicoid secret order), I searched for information about you or your work on the Internet. There was little or none to be found. This, of course, was not to be tolerated, and I resolved to do something to ameliorate the situation.

I decided the best way to accomplish this would be for me to create a World-Wide Web homepage dedicated to you. The Web, in case you don’t know, is a collection of interlinked graphics-intensive “pages” which millions of internet users fritter away the best hours of their lives browsing in. The purpose of my new site in cyberspace would be to both introduce new readers to your work in an informative and non-worshipful manner, and to give existing readers information on publishers and current projects and some pretty pictures to look at. I tentatively named the site Ellison Webderland.

I had already put a great deal of effort into this project when it was suggested to me that you might be surprised, enraged, and possibly litigious upon finding your name and image appearing on computer screens throughout the world without your knowledge or sanction. Before continuing with my efforts I therefore am asking for your grudging permission, if not your blessing. I would also like to make the site available to you in whatever capacity you desire, either for your own comments or as another way to reach a generation for whom the word “book” is becoming sadly obsolete.

I have no commercial intentions or any hopes of financial gain through this project, nor am I a fanatic who hopes to preach about your glories. If either of these possibilities worries you, I am willing to take whatever reasonable steps are necessary to address your concerns. The fact that I am writing you should give some indication I am sincere in my intentions, but to further that end I will send you any information you desire about the proposed page, up to and including full layouts and text.

I am writing your wife Susan at the HERC asking for permission to publish their name and address and offering my services to place any information they desire on the page. I am also writing Morpheus, International asking for permission to use the logo and some images from The Essential Ellison. However, without your say-so I really can’t see continuing with the project, and therefore eagerly await your response. Feel free to call me collect at the listed number (I am home by 6pm EST most nights) if you wish to discuss this voice. Thank you for your time.

Sincerely,
Rick Wyatt


HAPPY BIRTHDAY HARLAN

Taking a quick time-out from the Sales Team Building Bus Trip From Hell for a quick and proper this time "Happy Birthday".

RICK:on the blackberry, on the posting screen, there is an unexpected link that reads "dreadful-unknown". Is this by design, or something plonked there without your knowledge?

And From Me, Too

Harlan,

Haven't had a chance to sign in or add my birthday wishes until now.

Enjoy dinner.

Have a Thai iced coffee for me.

Bob

Birthday Wishes
Harlan,

Happy birthday!

Please add my blast of the Birthday whizzer to that list as well!

You've out done Peter Pan!

Age 75!
Still veritical and handsome as heck. Can't beat that!

HARLAN ON THIS BIRTHDAY BUSINESS


Beginning with a solid smack of a kiss to each of you. You all DID, in fact, bring a smile to my face in the wake of Happy Birthday greetings. Yeah, I made it to 75, a stretch of open highway no one, myself included, thought was attainable. But here it is, and here I am, and believe it or not, every one of you wishing me good, makes me feel cheery and loved.

Consider this reply your payment for a generous deed redounding to my smiling-all-day feeling of worthiness. I will try not to disappoint y'all in the months or years to come.

At age 75, I am shocked as hell still to be vertical.

Yr. Pal, Harlan

Sonnet for May 27
Hark, shall we let this day of days just pass ?/ And say anon what we should say just now ?/ Repenting, as a school boy missing class ?/ Lest shorter times and lesser minds allow./ Attend thee then, the object of our love,/No hedgehog hiding, fearing some reverse:/ Jousting righteously at the gods above/ Enough to free minds from their heaven's curse./ Let heart be glad, let voice go up in song;/ Let all who read rejoice that he is here./ If he was not then so much would be wrong,/Sending us out to a world of fear./O Harlan, live forever, fit and fair!/ No world is worth the fight without you there ! {all the best to you and Susan,my friends, John Z}

New Yorker and Dreams
Dear Harlan,

I'm sorry to hear about the New Yorker, but I took a lot from your response to it. After decades of being a working writer you didn't sound bitter and you didn't sound surprised. It is what it is. If there's anything I've learned from you and your work ethic it's that nothing comes easy. You bust your ass to do the best you can as often as you can and in the end that has to be all there is. Your response also proved that you can have name recognition and fame and fans and an incredible body of work, but it doesn't mean you get what you want (if what you want is more than creating the work itself). It's a valuable lesson to everyone here. My guess is you could (or can) have your work published in an number of venues on your name alone, but at the end of the day you are a writer and writers get rejected sometimes. Thank you for that and, again, I'm sorry they didn't publish it. As much as I'd like to read it someday I know that there is still so much of your work I have yet to read, so those are new stories, too.

Thank you and Happy Birthday!
Tony Adams

Happy birthday, Harlan...

Happy Birthday Harlan! May you and Susan have a wonderful day!

Cheers, Colleen

Happy Birthday, Harlan!

Many happy returns, good sir!

Not to jinx it or anything, but you're now only one year away from obliterating the final death you predicted in "The Day I Died." _I_ predict you'll wipe that one out, too.

Tonight I'll be whooping it up in Portland with "Plan 9 From Outer Space" -- a big-screen showing with a whole new musical soundtrack performed by string quartet and electronica, and the Willamette Radio Workshop voicing the original dialogue live:

http://www.filmusik.com/


(I'll be doing the voices of Colonel Edwards and Patrolman Larry, for those of you familiar with this masterwork. There's another showing on Friday.)

Man/Booker - Alice Munro
Dear Mr. Ellison,

Word came out today about Alice Munro winning the Man Booker International prize this year and I was curious if you had any opinions about her award and writing and particularly it's acknowledgment of an author with a body of work which is almost exclusively short stories.

Thanks for your stories over the years and Happy Birthday.

Sincerely,

Michael Decsi

HAEP PWEURT/TKAEU HAR/HRAPB

Harlan, you've called me a mensch here in the pavillion, not once but twice. I didn't acknowledge it, because I couldn't put together a response that made any sense; but I will finally say thank you.

You've proven yourself countless times to be a person of integrity and honor. If anyone deserves to be called a mensch, and to have a happy birthyday, you do.

Felicitations from the Falls
"I will not say, 'Oh, King, live forever, but 'Oh King, live as long as you like!"
-- William Dean Howells (another Ohio boy) to Mark Twain at the 1905 birthday dinner.

That was Twain's 70th birthday, but since 75 is the new 70 . . .
Twain's response was Harlanesque and also seems suitable to the day: "I have achieved my seventy years in the usual way; by sticking strictly to a scheme of life which would kill anybody else."

Sounds vaguely familiar. And, oh, King, thanks for those bound wonders that line our shelves and enrich our lives -- on your natal day, it's appropriate to acknowledge that we have been the recipients of the gifts that keep on giving. So say I!

Birthdays at you!

Happy Birthday, Harlan. Ups and downs, trials and tribulations, the good, the bad, the ugly and the exceptional. You have lived one hell of an extraordinary life, sir. Thank you for sharing it with us.

Don't fret over the legacy; the Work will stand. You have nothing to fear from posterity's memory.

Have a wonderful day, smooch the missuz.
~~~~~~~~

Jim H.~ Many Happy Returns of the day as well.
~~~~~~~~~~~

Kristian Bland~ as John Babson Lane Soul (or Horace Greeley) wrote, "Go West, young man..."

Seriously, we're almost on the same latitude. Take I-10 to 71, it's only a four hour drive. Austin is an oasis of sanity in a desert of mania.
Alternatively, you could run for Governor of Beaumont, and change that place for the better from within.
~~~~~~~~~~

Have a great week, gang. May we all do much good.

Paul & Kathrine Hull

Harlan, congratulations on reaching three score and fifteen years!

David

BIrthdasy wishes
I saw your profile on cable. You are a very interesting person that I can relate to. You have guts, and you speak your mind.

Today is your birthday. I dedicate to you the Beatle's version of "Today is your birtday". May you have many more.

Jaime Amezquita

Huh?
Ellison, another birthday? Didn't you just have one? Man, you must be older than antediluvian mud! Only a silver bullet will kill you.

My felicitations on this auspicious day!

Your pal,

Pogue

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, HARLAN!

Here's hoping you have an awesome party with friends over to check out your new games and toys.

Here's to getting the corner piece of the cake you want, y'know, the one with the most frosting and designs that aren't too girlie or little kiddish.

Here's to being allowed to stay up late if you want because the day is all about you.


Sandra, Doug, Ian (Young Jackanapes), James

HB
Happy Birthday!!

You’re already legendary - may as well hang around for another 75.

Be well.

For no particular reason...
...I hope you're having an amazing day and that you will continue to have many more terrific days, weeks, months, years, and such. Because I feel the big love for you, my friend.

P.S. Properly attributed, I told a condensed version of your "Wiz story" to an audience at the East Coast Black Age of Comics Convention a couple Saturdays ago. It killed.

ANOTHER BIRTHDAY COMMENT!!!!!
Happy birthday Harlan! I look forward to being berated for the sentiments. ;)

-The Abdominal Mr. Owen

Happy Birthday, Unca Harlan! Here's to many more!

Happy Birthday, Ellison-san!

May your silky white hair grow whiter than a Japanese winter. Here's to a man who knows how to age with dignity. (Mr. Shatner, are you listening?)

Feliz Cumpleanos en el Templo Azteca Perdido de Estropea

"It's your Birthday! It's your Birthday! La-la-la, la-la-la It's your Birthday! Have a Haaa-ppeee Buuuurrrth-daaaaaayy!!!"

(Disclaimer: No copyrights were injured or infringed in this notification.)


HAPPY BIRTHDAY UNCA H!!!

Almost an Old Man

Dear Harlan,

Since "old" is somebody who is fifteen years older than the guy doing the talking, and you are but a mere thirteen or so years ahead of me, you are aren't quite an old man from where I sit, and ratio-wise, won't ever be.

Happy birthday, and best wishes for keeping your slot for years to come.

Birthday
Happy birthday Harlan! Besides having in common incredible good looks and charm, we also share a birthday. I hope you have a great day and, as Watterson's Calvin might say, get lots of loot!

Mr. Ellison!
A Man of and for the Ages might have little need for any particular day. But as this Earth turns today, I hope you and Susan and friends have a celebration that will long be remembered.

Happy Birthday Harlan!

Via a personal site, I receive profiles of women searching for the 'ONE.' For the most part, it's short order skimming over each profile but one stood out. Not in an attractive way, more like I had to get a closer look at this 50 year old train wreck posing as a possible mate. Here, then, is part of her profile and the reason I have to learn filtering skills:

last read:
I read "The Officers Wives" and absolutely loved it, could even identify with some of the caracters (sic), places and events, but usually I'm saving reading for real, real old age, when I don't have a life anymore.

I'm sure you will understand that I'll be celebrating your birthday by gouging out my eyes with the dullest of knives.

Richard Halasz

First and foremost - Happy Birthday, Harlan!

Now, regarding Texas...

I know I'm a little rough on the state, but it's not like the place makes it difficult. Still, the whole place isn't all bad. Austin, for example, is a great city. If the rest of the state followed its lead, things would be a lot brighter.

Unfortunately, I live in a little speck-on-the-map of a city that is squeezed right between ignorance and idiocy. A few miles to the east, we have the lovely city of Vidor, where James Byrd, Jr. was brutally murdered by being dragged naked behind a pick-up truck for three miles - because he was black. A few miles in the other direction, and we find Lumberton - where the New Black Panthers recently held a rally to denounce brutality by racist police officers.

Naturally, all of the sordid goings-on are underpinned by the gracious teachings of evangelical baptist churches, although they must be using a special dictionary, since they seem to define words like tolerance, acceptance, and brotherhood as, "hate anyone who is different from us."

Apart from the racism and bigotry, there's the general distrust of knowledge, education, and independent thought. All added together, it amounts to a miserable place, filled with miserable people doing miserable things.

However, I'll concede that the entire state isn't like this. I know that I probably shouldn't lump the whole population of the second largest state in the union together into one big ball of suck, but it's just so much easier. Compared to trying to explain to people where places like Beaumont, Vidor, and Lumberton are, communication is greatly simplified by simply citing Texas as a whole.

In other news, I just checked my order on Amazon and my Dreams With Sharp Teeth DVD has reached the Lone Star state. Hopefully, it won't be intercepted by the thought police before it gets all the way to my front porch.

P.S. - I don't like having to rely on places like Barnes and Noble or Books-A-Million any more than does anyone else who loves the written word. I just have little choice. There used to be several independent, locally-owned bookstores in the area, but they've all shut down over the years, save for one. Sadly, it seems to deal almost exclusively in romance novels. Whenever my fiancee and I take a trip anywhere, we always make it a point to track down any local bookstores we can find - and it almost always pays off. I remember struggling to find a copy of "On Stranger Tides" by Tim Powers a few years ago, and I came across a first edition printing nestled away in the corner of a tiny used bookstore on Galveston island.

I shop locally whenever possible, as I despise chains of almost every sort. I happily pay more for the same products, choosing to view the added cost as a sort of courtesy fee for never having to walk amidst the waterheads and zombies slouching towards apathy along the dreary isles of a blighted and terrible place like Wal-Mart.

Yet another salutation
So...Harlan, how does it feel to be ten? (Trust me: I'm not being a smartaleck. There's a lot to be said about remaining ten forever. I'm trying my best, but I think I'm permanently locked into remaining 17.)

Happy Birthday, Harlan Ellison.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, NAOMI CAMPBELL!

Is it time yet? What, now? Oh, Ok...let me see....
Where'd I put that thing? *shuffles about* *checks nightstand* *checks under the bed* *looks behind the bookcase* Aha, there it is! *dusts it off*

Here's your birthday wishes on the appropriate day. ;-) Have a great day with your wonderful gal.

All the best,
Peg

How interesting: a semisesquicentennial man
UNCA HARLAN,

Happy birthday from a longtime reader (going on 40 years now since the happy day I first encountered your work) and a devoted flying blue monkey. As Mr. Electrico said to Ray Bradbury, "Live forever!"

Steve J.

A glimmer of hope for writers
Happy Birthday, Harlan.

And this may make y'all feel better. Charles Taylor at _The Nation_ revisits Donald Westlake's novel, _The Ax_, twelve years on:

http://www.thenation.com/doc/20090608/taylor/print?rel=nofollow

It's a brief piece, but it's good to see a great novel by a great writer being rediscovered and found important. It means that posterity's always possible.

Harlan,

Mazel tov, Happy 75th Birthday!

Mark

Ibid.
Dear Mr. Ellison,

No, couldn't wait.

My favorite lines from the original "The Producers":

"Shut up."

"No, you shut up. You are the audience. I am the author. I OUTRANK YOU!"

See yesterday's (!!) post from my doppelganger.

Many happy more.

William Sherman
Boxford, MA

HARLAN:
Have a happy. I know you will.

DWST is waiting for me when I get home. I already have a waiting list of people who want to rent it. Can't wait to see it myself!

With much love and best wishes to you both,
Dreaded Slaymaker

Happy 75th!
Have a great birthday, Harlan! Looks to be another lovely day in LA, so go out and enjoy!
75? But young in your soul.

SeventyforGod'ssakefive! (Tmesis!)
I hope you enjoy THIS birthday, and I hope you enjoy many, many, MANY more birthdays as well!

Happy Birthday, Harlan Ellison
"I See a Man Sitting On a Chair and the Man is Biting His Cake".

This is why Robert Sheckley was a better choice,
Brian Phillips

Kristian Bland's report about looking for Dreams in Texas is absolute killer! (And the fact that he thinks there are bookstores called Barnes and Nobel only adds to it.)

A fine ol' happy birthday to you Harlan!
And forgive our premature friends - we all feel you deserve more party time than just one day.

Hi Harlan,

Just a quick brithday message hoping you have an outstanding celebration on your special day. Cindy, Evangelia and me know that Susan will have a Birthday cake that is bound to be delicious.

Hi Harlan,
I want to wish you a very happy birthday and many more ,
have a good one mate,
do you have any new books,essays being released ?
all the best ,

It's the 27th in Texas... have a Happy Birthday Harlan. You never change... you're Peter Pan.
:)
Your pal,
Cindy



Kristian,
Darlin’-- your illustration is
outstanding.

http://www.thebrokenslipper.com/

You told your entire story in that lovely bit of art. It's wonderful!

Now, I must take you to task a little about the Great State of Texas. Ours is the finest State in the Union. And I will explain why--

tomorrow, dear. Today is about Harlan.

Your fellow Texan who is proud of you for your artwork.
:)
Cindy

Birthday Wishes
Popping in to offer best wishes, etc. to a Titan (figurative) of Literature.

Happy birthday wishes, Unca Harlan, from the Land of Enchantment!

SJPO

Happy birthday, Harlan! (A bit early, still, but hey, it's already the 27th here on the East Coast.) And best wishes for many more.

The "Dreams" DVD is climbing the charts - as I write this, it's #5 on Amazon's list of top-selling documentaries on DVD, here:
http://www.amazon.com/gp/bestsellers/dvd/508532/ref=pd_zg_hrsr_d_1_2_last

Also, I don't know if "ironic" is exactly the right word for this ... but given the recent discussion here about the New Yorker's rejection of our host's new story, did anyone else notice that the sole reviewer's quote on the "Dreams" DVD box - "A nasty little dream come true" - is from, yes, the New Yorker?

Birthdays and Blind Followers
LOL! one person makes a mistake, and then everybody follows him/her. Is that how the Macarena happened? Well i log on once or twice a week and delurk even less so I will use this visit to wish Harlan a happy 75th.

Current read: MASON&DIXON by Thomas Pynchon
Current DVDs: ROBIN HOOD- Season Two (BBC) (I've only seen the first three episodes, so please no spoilers - especially not who died!)
Recently Seen Films: STAR TREK, TERMINATOR:SALVATION (OK, so that last one was my boyfriend's idea)

Kristin

Best Wishes
Happy birthday, Harlan.

Sincerely,
Bill

Hulk Congratulate!!
Pah! Hulk had enough of puny humans wishing Harlan happy birthday on wrong day.

Day in London is now May 27th - that good enough for Hulk.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, PUNY HARLAN! (though Hulk would not wish to tackle you in arm-wrestle....)

Hulk hope Susan can find big enough cake to hold 75 candles...

(Congrats, old bean - best wishes from the Brit Brothers - Rob & Paul Ewen)

I have the unfortunate honor of living in Texas and, on behalf of the hideous shadow my state casts upon the rest of the nation, I apologize. It would seem that reading is how Texans believe the Devil gets inside you, because it's virtually impossible to find good books by great authors in this hellishly hot waste of American real estate.

To make matters worse, trying to track down a DVD of Dreams With Sharp Teeth proved to be an exercise in futility, and a painful reminder of just how stupid people can be.

Read about my failed quest here:
http://coqdiddles.blogspot.com/2009/05/i-have-no-dvd-and-i-must-watch.html

It really is a sad thing to live in a place where "documentary" is a four-letter word.

Pity me.

A birthday?
Happy birthday, Harlan!

Thai Gorge
Harlan:
You're most welcome.
I've found with my own recent birthday and anniversary that the gift of food is my fave.
Much as I appreciate 'em, I just have too many unwatched DVDs and unread books. But food... always time for that.
Best,
Dennis C

Harlan,

I'd like to wish you a happy birthday, but I cannot.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
I will tomorrow, when it is really your birthday.
.
.
.
.
.

Happy Birthday
Heya everybody,

I've been nothing but scarce for some time now but hadda stick my head into this bastion of the best to wish its humble host a happy birthday. You have inspired me to better things. May good fortune and health walk you from this year to the next.

A Birthday Song for Harlan
Happy
Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday to you!
I heard it was your birthday so
I purchased you a Shoe.

It has
dirty laces
and a smell that's full of funk,
I found it in a trunk,
the trunk was full of junk.

It cost
a pretty penny,
not one off a dead man's eyes.
As I gave it to the clerk,
he cried and cried and cried.

It seems
the shoe it once belonged
to a former love
who did die in a tragic fall
o'er a cliff when she he did shove.

This song
it should be over now.
I've nowhere else to go,
You should have the happiest
of Birthdays, ow my toe!

Happy Birthday Harlan!
Fress, plotz and enjoy yourself,
Reverend Fu

I want to find out why the New Yorker rejected the story--the exact reason, not some bullshit.

"Plot is like so last year," is the culprit, I'd assume.

--------------

Happy Birthday ya old goat!! Make sure to put a bell on that new walker, so as not to run over any toes.

Much love to my favorite writer.

Through the spanking machine with ya. You know you like it.

----------------

Patraeus supports closing down Gitmo and stopping torture. The right have no more allies.

DENNIS C.: Thanks, kiddo, for you-know-what. I promise you that The Gorge is on. Sumpun is one of our faves, and has been one of mine all the way back to the '60s when I was working at the Four Stars studio just around the block. The O-Loa and the mint noodle and the softshell crab and the Ton-Ka-Kai and the Saku sui mai (likely all misspelled) are the best I've ever tasted. Anywhere. So...many thanks.

Yr. Pal, Harlan

Revenge
Fuck the New Yorker, they don't deserve your story.
We will all cherish it when we finally get to read it.
Harlan, you get the best revenge, another birthday.
Thanks for the heads up on DWST on Sundance channel, my TIVO is set, and I'll be buying the DVD.
Susan, I'm finally putting my HERC renewal in the mail today, been busy at work, no life.
Hope you both have a wonderful HE birthday!

Harlan,

Harry Knowles had some very kind words about Dreams with Sharp Teeth and you specifically

http://www.aintitcool.com/node/41187

Let me know if you need his number again should you wish to contact him directly

Mark

Anyone

What is the quote that Harlan uses in DWST related to editors/everyone harping on him to complete his work. Something like “It is done on time if it is done well.” I know that isn’t it, but what is the quote and who said it. (I could get it from the DVD I will order, but I need it Now. In fact, given a chance I would cram it down my bosses throat, but then…Serenity now, serenity now.)

And while I’m pissed, I still go ballistic every time I read this quote from Shawn Levy, director for the second “Night at the Museum” movie. “We’ve created a geographical convenience that is not entirely accurate. It’s semi-accurate, so I feel OK about it.”

Geographical Convenience??!! Semi-accurate??!!

Pisses me off so much I’m in the middle of a (so far) three-part screed for my internal auditing blog. Don’t know how I’ll connect it to auditing (yet), but I’ve got to scream to someone.

And my apologies if Shawn Levy is a better person than this quote implies. (semi-accurate…..sheeesh)

Mike

Happy Birthday
Happy Birthday Harlan, hope you're enjoying it.

FAQ

Happy Birthday Harlan!

Thanks for all that you do! (even the grumpy parts)

Best!

MM

Happy birthday Harlan
Watched DWST last night. It was worth the wait and I eagerly await payday so I can go buy a copy (or 6).

I just wanted to add my good wishes on your Birthday, all the best to you and Susan.

Gary

Birthday present
This doesn't seem right. Mr. E has the birthday tomorrow and my copy of DWST looks to be arriving tomorrow. HE's got the birthday but I get the present.

Hope you have a wonderful birthday, Mr. E!

Jan S

Happy Birthday, Mr. Ellison!!

Good H.G. Wells Quote
"We must not allow the clock and the calendar to blind us to the fact that each moment of life is a miracle and mystery."

I'm not fond of the word "miracle," and tend to see it in the same context of the word skeptics reserve for making fun of pseudoscience: "woohoo." I think a better word would be "wonder," but who am I to second guess Wells?

-Keith

Oops!
Dang! It's only the 26th? Apologies from a confused night-worker.

Happy Birthday Greeting
Many happy returns of the day from my wife & myself, Unca Harlan!

Well, since I'm the lard-headed goop who touched off this firecracker a day early to begin with...

Let me not prematurely age you, dear Harlan. Take another day at the current plateau, and chastise me at will (I use words, not numbers, and I suck at dates, so there you go), and let's all circle back when it's not actually an UnBirthday.

With egg firmly on face, I remain:

FinderDoug
prematureisn'tusuallyaproblem, VA

I don't think so....
If you think you're getting an effin' early Happy Birthday outta me you can forget it! You're just gonna have to wait till tomorrow, sucka.

It's May 27 Somewhere in the World
Dear Mr. Ellison,

(Sorry for the multi-posts, and the bad poop to all.)

Why the !@#$%^&*( did I write down May 26? Anyway, enjoy tomorrow, sir.

Must toss those dumb pills.

Will lose myself for a day or so to atone.

Regards,

William Sherman
Boxford, MA

Balloons and fireworks and cake
This prodigal webderlander momentarily returns to the fold to wish you, DA MAN!!!!, a happy, happy, happy birthday. Hope you enjoy many more and keep giving Mr. D. the two-finger salute.

Birthday
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Mr Harlan Ellison - have a totally FINE DAY! - May 27

~ Stephen B

Happy Birthday, Harlan!

So guys, I was looking forward to getting Dreams With Sharp Teeth sent to me today via Netflix. However, as of today they STILL say the release date is "unknown" and are not shipping it. But, but, but it's not unknown, it's today, fools! Arg.

Confusion...and being late (or early) for very important dates
DIANE: You're not confused, Williams Powell and Sherman are. I always say that it's best to play it safe by picking a date far removed from the actual one, and proceeding to wish a particular friend/family member/foe a very, merry UN-birthday.

Cheers,
DTS

extreme cognitive dissonance
Hi, Harlan et al Just used good old
Google to check the date. In my neck of
chicago, it is May 26. I do not see the grim spectre of Rod Serling lurking over my shoulder, so I am assuming this is correct. Coourse, I have been up all night, so not too willing am I to trust the five senses.
all this is nmy whimsical way of saying, I thought you were born on May 27. However, I am often confused. At any rate, Happy Birthday any old ways. hAVE A GGOD ONE. dID YOU KNOW, gABRIEL bYRNES b.d. IS mAY 12. Just looked at what I typed. I think mayhap I'm tired. That's what I think. Anyway, why I mention G.B., I glanced at his web site and fdound a list of ways one can tell one is perhaps getting old. One is your brain cells get down to a manageable level. While this applies to me, it does not to you, you youngster you. Another is young women start opening doors for you. I guess in my case this would be young men stop opening the same doors. This sadly happened to moi some years ago. But as someone pointed out to me some years ago, getting older is the beytter alternative. Happy Birthday, Mr E. Hope you have a joyous day whether it be today or tomorrow. I should retype this, but I am letting it fly, because otherwise Frank will yell at me about its bveing all one paragraph. I promise I am not a cereal killer Frank, but I am rreally tired and I have been on this DAMN THING ALL NIGHT LONG. So you guys all hang in there. I sam moseying downtown to see my lawyer, and then to much needed restful slumber. L and K, Diane

hippo birds eye two ewe
and many more!

What's the matter with you guys? You should be in bed so you minds can function during the day, which they don't.

Dolores: I watched your DWST Q&A video last night (and pointed out that part 6 was a repeat of part 3, which you fixed) which is mostly audio. It is good that you announce it here personally (no one ever does) so Harlan can let you know if he has any issues with it. Some of his appearances are recorded professionally for possible later release, and the best thing is to ask him before making anything available, just in case. The stories Harlan told were very interesting and most of them I hadn't heard.

Oh lordy lord, it's that day again.
I still say he's gonna bury all of us.

The Perils of Insomnia
Dear Mr. Ellison:

Just can't hit that "n" key this a.m. to spell "insomnia".


Alles gute zum Geburtstag, Felices Cumpleanos, Joyeaux Anniversaire, etc.

William Sherman
Boxford, MA

Happy Birthday, Mr. Ellison
Dear Mr. Ellison:

Occasionally, isomnia has its benefits.

Ergo, allow me to be the first today to wish you a Happy Semisesquicentennial, with many happy returns.

Regards,

William Sherman
Boxford, MA

Inspiration
I recently watched a program on the Sundance Channel about your work Mr. Ellison I was not moved but slammed out the door that locked my imagination.

I have always been my own worst critic and have failed to believe in myself as a writer. Raised by self employed ceramists and painters I grew up in a liberal world. As a child I was extremely hyperactive and told would not function in society. My parents were told by many so called professionals that I should have been put in a institution. That was something that I believe crippled me as an artist. I was scarred of my own ideas. I grew up in an abusive home in my early childhood and the harsh reality of that life did not allow anything to be forbidden for me and my imagination.

Seeing a brief overture of your life as a writer and your obstacles gave me the hope and inspiration to just write. Being yourself and living a life less ordinary is something I have always tried to do. Having stood out from the crowd all my life I believe has helped me grow as an individual but sometimes would cause me problems with others reinforcing my insecurity.

Being yourself should never be an obstacle. Dreams with sharp teeth opened my eyes, my heart and imagination back to writing.
As a fellow atheist, Something I strongly believe is, Religion is man's greatest irresponsibility. Lunacy is not a basis for hope or revelation.

Thank you again for being a inspriration for me. You will be seeing my work soon.
Robert Santos Frideaux

Finally watching _DWST_
Harlan, you tell a story that you've also written up, about a time when the kids ganged up on you, ang your mom asked you "What did you do to make them angry?"

I know you probably get this a lot... but I had a couple of very, very similar events with other kids and my mom.

Amazing how that shit stays with us all.

From the second review link posted below:

"When Ellison gripes about what was done to a screenplay, we don’t hear the other side."

"I wish Nelson had taken off the rose-colored glasses for a moment and called Ellison on it. He should demand the author explain himself, and remember his own rants against movie and TV studios that he claims have bought his scripts and never used them."

Why, why, WHY? What the fuck is this, in review after review of DREAMS: demands for equal time and hearing 'the other side', Nelson should've done this and why didn't Harlan say that and shit like "he rails—maybe rightly so—against Cameron for stealing ideas" (MAYBE rightly so? MAYBE?) and on and on and on, from every douchey half-assed dink who pans the film. I don't fuckin' get it. Do these same reviewers piss and moan and make the same demands when 60 Minutes does a profile of Bruce Springsteen or Lena Horne or Stephen King? I am betting eleventy million dollars they do not.

I could just be stupid, but I saw the film myself and what I think it's about is this guy, this author, who has made a name for himself and has created an amazing body of work and here's what he's about and here's what he thinks and here's what he's got to say and you can see why some people love him and why some people think he's a pain in the ass. The end. I am not sure I needed DREAMS to do anything more for me than that, but perhaps it is I who am the dink.

Is there nothing, NOTHING, on TV tonight?


But seriously...

HARLAN - I look forward to "How Interesting: A Tiny Man" wherever it may find a home; and I suspect it will find one before anything I've got in the pipe comes off the press. (Side note: you're already on the list of People What Get Consideration When My Copies Come In – all the solids you've done for me in our time? With bells on their front covers or end-papers, your copies will arrive. Fuggetaboutit.)

Oh, and in the event I manage to forget tomorrow, since I get to wrap myself around the axle preparing for this week's quarterly Sales meeting (and also while I'm in the neighborhood), Happy (Early) Womb Expulsion Day.

I do have a question about work habits (yeah, I know – as gifts go, I could have done better than ASK OF YOU): as I've been sifting through projects and starts and ideas on my desk, now that my semester has quieted and I can do some grinding with the keyboard, I'm curious how YOU decide what to pick up and work when you're not under a specific deadline. Is it driven by the current 'hot' idea or inspiration where you can simmer away; is there a methodology whereby you revisit works in progress to see which one is ready to continue; or is it more workman-like: taking the next concept on the pile (whatever it is), sitting down, cracking your knuckles and banging away?

I know how my muse likes to dance, and I've already got my working list of fun things to do and make, but I'm still interested how you select the next thing to roll into the carriage.

Q & A Video
I finally got around to putting up my video of the Q & A for Dreams With Sharp Teeth yesterday on YouTube. Anyone have an interest in seeing it? Is this an appropriate place to link it? Did someone else post it? Did I totally miss the boat? How long would Dick Cheney stand up to water boarding? What's my name? Why am I here?

Anyone?

Damn,damn and DAMN.
The title gill-hooked me, and now-- all I can think about is how much I wanted to read "How Interesting: A Tiny Man."

Sincerely SIGHING,
Cindy

Harlan and The New Yorker
I love Harlan's work. I'm also a regular reader of The New Yorker, which introduced me to the work of the brilliant Jhumpa Lahiri. It's a shame these two couldn't get together, but that fact diminishes each one's brilliance not one iota.

I can't wait to see "Dreams..." on Sundance tonight. I've emailed friends to let them know that if they have the Sundance Channel, they should check it out. You should, too.

Flying monkeys, working for the Greater Good.

Memorial Day Weekend
After three days at a huge local game convention (run by the Sikhs) that's diverted much of my government "stimulus" check into BART rides to SFO, the question arose (as a possible topic for a web forum post here): other than Babylon 5, why no other non-electronic, map or ref-based game with a setting that draws from one or more of those literary creations featured at this fine website, here?

Ditto what Jack S. said, and what ATC said. Bravo, gentlemen.

And Dear Harlan....thinking fondly of you and Susan celebrating however you think best the happy Day Which Shall Not be Named. :-)

CC

Entertainment Weekly
really likes "Dreams":

http://tinyurl.com/rxonm4

THIS trout, on the other hand....

http://tinyurl.com/ov4kba

On The Road
On the road, traveling, where access to internet is limited; will not be much evident here for a while. Two things: one, a happy birthday to Harlan, and two, while I am disappointed that THE NEW YORKER will not be taking his story, I find any bile expended in their direction for making that decision silly and clueless in the extreme. It's what magazines do, folks. More often to some of us than to others. Be healthy and well, everybody.

Thanks and the New Yorker
Thank you to everyone that posted such nice and interesting responses to my post. Should you wish to read it with some unfortunate tense changes and typos removed, Mark Palko suggested that I post it on his blog (which is good reading in general), which I did.

http://daddywhatsarepublican.blogspot.com/

It's also been expanded slightly.

Also, to add to the many voices, I am also disappointed that the New Yorker didn't publish Harlan Ellison's story. I don't read it much and it's not because of a lack of quality, it's just that when I do, I read a bit of the magazine and then I see all that New York has, I get nostalgic for Rockland County and it just gets me down.

Then again, the 13.75% sales tax I am not paying on food makes me feel a tad better.

Brian Phillips

HARLAN'S STORY
I guess I'm one of the "three or four" people who read the story pre-New Yorker. I have to say I really love the thing. Certainly it would not have disgraced the pages of that magazine. But none of that matters. As Harlan well knows, you write them and you send them out. That's it. Personally, I tried to crack F&SF for around 25 years before I finally made it, just this Spring. You could even say I had my eye on that particular market for almost FORTY years. Harlan is a great short story writer. Just fucking great. A given market isn't always on top of it.

Nothing against the content of The New Yorker, but it seems to me that they shouldn't make literature free.

For those who still haven't ordered, the Dreams DVD will be released tomorrow and the best price online is $16.71 from DeepDiscount.com. (Free US shipping. $5.95 shipping for those of us who live in the remote areas of the world.)

The allmovie guide review mentions that "Ellison resembles the late actor George Grizzard as he looked and sounded from the 1960s to the 21st century". Is that a good thing?
www.allmovie.com/dvd/dreams-with-sharp-teeth-214589

VideoHound's Golden Movie Retriever: "At its best, pic provides a view of the creative world of one of the most renowned popular writers of our time." (3 bones out of 4)

STARLOG: www.starlog.com/component/content/article/11-filmreviews/183-dreams-with-sharp-teeth-the-starlog-review

There are many more reviews but I'm sure Creative is keeping track of them. On the other hand...

IGN likes the film ok but is not overly satisfied with the technical aspects of the DVD. Eat that, Nelson!
http://uk.dvd.ign.com/articles/985/985614p1.html

Good quote from Edmonton Journal: "...imagine watching an episode of Jerry Springer with really smart, literate people. That's what this movie feels like..."
www2.canada.com/edmontonjournal/news/story.html?id=3b027cb5-4ae3-497a-b698-cf1b86de28f2

JMS spoke at the annual Julius Schwartz Lecture at MIT. Apparently he's involved in at least three films: Ninja Assassin (Wachowski), World War Z (zombie movie), and Lensman (Ron Howard). http://jducoeur.livejournal.com/517679.html

Blackstone has a date for Voice from the Edge 3 - Oct 1.
http://www.blackstoneaudio.com/audiobook.cfm?id=5407

new yorker
Harlan-sorry that your day in the New Yorker won't happen just yet but I know it will happen soon. I do think that James Levy makes a valid point. I have been a reader of the magazine nearly as long as I've been reading you and I am fond of it. It reminds me of the time not so long ago but, sadly, never to come back, when you could walk down Chestnut street or Walnut and go south on 12th or 8th or wherever and there would be Harlan's Shoppe or Zeock's Books, quirky places that maybe sold art deco radios or Ace Doubles or Eversharp fountain pens. The sort of shops that would turn up in a John Collier or Robert Sheckley short story or start the scene of a Thorne Smith novel. The New Yorker doesn't have as much of its inner Elwood P. Dowd as it once did but there's enough and like Robert Ryan at the end of The Wild Bunch we remember and make do. And you'll be there, Harlan.

" Given Harlan's status as a bona fide great American short story writer, somebody should have enunciated their objections and, as a courtesty to a fifty year publishing phenom, "

ABSOLUTELY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Editing used to be a process

Our host has shown the good sense of a seasoned professional and rightly, I would guess, chalked up his rejection by the New Yorker to the approval process and not his story. However, being an editor used to be a profession in which one worked with writers to gain a finished product. Given Harlan's status as a bona fide great American short story writer, somebody should have enunciated their objections and, as a courtesty to a fifty year publishing phenom, delivered more than a boilerplate "thank you ever so much, but no thank you." If the story is not flawed, they should have published it. If it is in their estimation flawed in some way, they should have talked about it with an author as accomplished as Harlan Ellison.

Good manners never hurt anybody, even the editors of The New Yorker. Harlan is too good a pro to think they owe him a place in their magazine, but one can argue that he has earned some professional courtesy.

New Yorker
All I could think of was "Happens to the best of us," which is true, but it don't mean much coming from _me_ and it _sho_ ain't gonna console our host none.

Oil and water. That says it. And we'll read the story, eventually, no matter where it's published.

THE SKINNIN'

Harlan,

I have to express my gratitude - even though it is overtly out of self-interest - when you share "outtakes" here from your business.

Regardless of the medium or field each among the creative types here forge, we can ALL empathize with that rejection slip, and the consternation we feel when it's a useless condescending imprimatur"no thanks" sans any explanation .

The professional novice can easily grow insecure after investing so much into his or her material. It isn't the rejection I object to personally - I've done lots of stuff many among friends and pros have both liked and disliked with equal measure; and that's never a problem for me; in fact, I'm my own toughest critic, BELIEVE me! - but the absence of even the briefest explanation ("it's too explicit", "it's too dark", "it's too grungy", "it's not pretty enough...we want PRETTY") USED to get me incredibly angry. For obvious reasons, I always wanted to know what the problem was. I mean even Simon Cowell gives a brief reason for the nix. Fortunately, I've grown wiser about it over time.

Thus, when someone seasoned like Harlan Ellison has an experience like that, it helps many of us understand the nature of the game. And THAT offers the inner arsenal we need to build a thick professional skin!

By the way, I hope someone picks up your new story soon. I really want to see it!

RE: THE NEW YORKER

Disappointed...yeah, sure I am.

Pissed-off, angry, fulminating, suicidally preening for vengeance...no, absolutely not even a scosh. I'm down with it.

I've been trying to sell a story to The New Yorker since 1954; if my calculations are correct, that would be five years more than half a century.

Reports on the editorial scrutiny were promising. The story went in via the Good Offices of a friend who had a direct connection to someone on the masthead; and it was enhanced by my NY literary agent, who followed up. The story--as reactions were conveyed to me--had made a good impression on everyone who saw it. So the weeks passed. Then, obviously, someone simply said "no."

Why, I have no idea. The bounce note my agent received was very
bland, as I had it read to me. Not much passion for or agin the story: just a sort of pro forma no-thank-you, a half dozen steps up from a printed stock turnaway, of the same sort I got when I was first starting my career. So I did what one must never do...I took the long silence between submission and rejection as more than enough stardust for me to get my hopes up.

But, finally, in an editorial vetting, in a system where anyone along the way can say "no," but only one can say "yes," the last person to read it, bounced it.

That's the way this game works, friends. It is yes or no. This time the answer, finally, no matter how many other eyes saw and recommended, it reached someone who said "no," for whatever his/her reasons may have been.

That's the way the game is played, folks. After 50+ years, through bunches of readers at The New Yorker, I go back to the place I began. And I truly can live okay without that small triumph in my vita. Whatever your feelings about what The New Yorker DOES publish, it is an outstanding magazine, and to have been acceptable to its staff would've been an "at last!" I'd have loved to experience.

So please, as I say, I'm condign with the knowledge that one way or another, free of animus, The New Yorker has once more politely decided not to include me in its pages. No letters or e.mails or phone calls to the magazine, as suggested earlier,
would do any good, and likely would pollute my chances for a future assessment.

And to be fair about this, my brethren, only three or four people pre-New Yorker, have read "How Interesting: A Tiny Man"
and you're assuming this is a good story unjustly slapped away by feckless androids at a venue that has become too snooty or somewhichway beyond YOUR range of What They Oughtta Be Publishing. That ain't fair. So please do not "act in my behalf," because I am sadly content to accept the obvious truth: The New Yorker and I are as oil and water.

Yr. Pal, Harlan

RE: THE NEW YORKER

Disappointed...yeah, sure I am.

Pissed-off, angry, fulminating, suicidally preening for vengeance...no, absolutely not even a scosh. I'm down with it.

I've been trying to sell a story to The New Yorker since 1954; if my calculations are correct, that would be five years more than half a century.

Reports on the editorial scrutiny were promising. The story went in via the Good Offices of a friend who had a direct connection to someone on the masthead; and it was enhanced by my NY literary agent, who followed up. The story--as reactions were conveyed to me--had made a good impression on everyone who saw it. So the weeks passed. Then, obviously, someone simply said "no."

Why, I have no idea. The bounce note my agent received was very
bland, as I had it read to me. Not much passion for or agin the story: just a sort of pro forma no-thank-you, a half dozen steps up from a printed stock turnaway, of the same sort I got when I was first starting my career. So I did what one must never do...I took the long silence between submission and rejection as more than enough stardust for me to get my hopes up.

But, finally, in an editorial vetting, in a system where anyone along the way can say "no," but only one can say "yes," the last person to read it, bounced it.

That's the way this game works, friends. It is yes or no. This time the answer, finally, no matter how many other eyes saw and recommended, it reached someone who said "no," for whatever his/her reasons may have been.

That's the way the game is played, folks. After 50+ years, through bunches of readers at The New Yorker, I go back to the place I began. And I truly can live okay without that small triumph in my vita. Whatever your feelings about what The New Yorker DOES publish, it is an outstanding magazine, and to have been acceptable to its staff would've been an "at last!" I'd have loved to experience.

So please, as I say, I'm condign with the knowledge that one way or another, free of animus, The New Yorker has once more politely decided not to include me in its pages. No letters or e.mails or phone calls to the magazine, as suggested earlier,
would do any good, and likely would pollute my chances for a future assessment.

And to be fair about this, my brethren, only three or four people pre-New Yorker, have read "How Interesting: A Tiny Man"
and you're assuming this is a good story unjustly slapped away by feckless androids at a venue that has become too snooty or somewhichway beyond YOUR range of What They Oughtta Be Publishing. That ain't fair. So please do not "act in my behalf," because I am sadly content to accept the obvious truth: The New Yorker and I are as oil and water.

Yr. Pal, Harlan

Harlan & Susan:
Thanks for the goodies and info and ... Sorry for not getting to you sooner, I've been out on tiles still dealing with Mom. I will of course give to you a call this week! Take care Tim

Nuts to the New Yorker
That's why I don't read the New Yorker any more

Well, I guess the New Yorker didn't think Harlan's story fit their publication. I haven't read the NY in ages. Not sure why, but it just didn't do it for me. I hope the new story finds a good home, soon. I'm betting it will.


Good luck at the funeral, Semi.

Chuck

Goddamn New Yorker! Harlan, so sorry. The beat does go on, but the beatdowns last.

Lio

SHAGIN - Thank you for sharing Lio! It is absolutlely delightful.

If anyone else is interested in viewing some samples of the Lio comic, head over to the Universal Press Syndicate webpage here:
http://www.amuniversal.com/ups/features/lio/index.htm

~Alisha

DTS: I'm not sure I missed the point as much as I didn't agree with it - but no matter. If you would like to pursue this debate in another forum, I'd be happy to oblige - otherwise, I'm happy to allow you the last word and will contact Sharon about the book.

SUSAN ELLISON: I am sorry I missed your call. The offer stands - if you need me any time in the future, I am here.

HARLAN: as for the New Yorker - as my dearly departed mother-in-law used to say, "they don't know what's good". Fuck 'em.

HARLAN: Your story will find a good home and when it does it will be eagerly devoured by appreciative readers. And try The New Yorker with the next story. And the next. And the next.

***

If any of you are not already familiar with Mark Tatulli's comic strip "Lio", get thee to a website or newspaper near you to check it out. Mr. Tatulli is the 2009 NCS Division Award Winner for Comic Strip, and there are two collections of the strip already out. Zack, you listening? Harlan, you too. Today's strip was great.

***

STEVE: Leave those damn whales alone!



shagin

SHOCK...COLD RAGE
I FOUND I HAD TO READ THE POST TWICE before it sank in. The New Yorker recieved a New Harlan story across there desk and rejected it. What kind of LOW LIFE IDIOTS are they. I tried to picture the mind that made that decision. I found myself at a loss. Of course I have not read this story but I have read Harlan in great depth and for many years as well as met him and heard him teach. The only conclusion I can come to is the New Yorker is run by petty minds who lack the where-with-all to recognize great writing when they see it. May they decend into the lowest realm of Writers hell never to be heard from again and rot there in the fumes of their own woefully inadicate minds. To strongly put? Not a chance! Sorry folks and I will only say this once for this post and all posts forthwith. The tiny gear in my brain that would handle spelling arrived defective off the factory floor. Yea, I already tried all methods of repair.The dictionary you say in a huff. Well lets take a second to comtemplate the simple use of the dictionary for a learning impaired person. Same Glich applies! One half hour to an hour easy on each word and that only goes for the words I can identify as spelled wrong. Most I don't.LIke a blind spot when you drive. I only take the time to detail this because I suspect there are others who post here with this same gluch, some who may be permanate lurkers because of it and demystify it for those of you that misspellings annoy. It is not neccessarily the sign of laziness or stupidity. It is what it is. KOS On the issue of silliness. Good idea! Back from and absence defined by THE GREAT BLUE-BLAS. Often a lurker seldom a poster but that is simply my nature. My husband and I have a very intense,humorous conversational life on all matter of topics that has ever deepened over 21 years. Perhaps that is why I am so often speechless here. However that may be This Site and the people on have come to mean a great deal to me.The topics, the alerts, the banter as well the deep meaning and thoughts conveyed nourish my life. Thanks all. maggie

(Greetings from Bellevue. Washington, not the hospital.)

"The New Yorker rejected my new story"



Fools.

Harlan
Please keep us informed when and where you DO sell the new story
I really enjoyed one of the latter ones, Incognito Inc. (about the man who makes maps being closed down by the corporation)
It was sold to one of the airlines for their inflight magazine as I recall

GOOD story that one!
I'm also looking forward to seeing Dreams With Sharp Teeth Monday

I noticed about The New Yorker that they make the stories and all or most other content available online for nothing. Need I say more?

Rick has updated the forum software and a handful of good people have announced they will make more use of the great SPIDER facilities. As for specifics, Barber will be taking a closer look at Mind Fields, and Duane is interested in looking at Spider Kiss. We should have preliminary page counts, descriptions of the covers, and philosophical musings on the presence of black, letter-like dots on the inside by the end of next year.

Any chance of a sequel anthology to Medea:Harlan's World? I loved the illustrations by Kelly Freas. I especially liked the concept seminar included in the book.

The New Yorker passed on a brand-spanking-new Ellison story? I'm not sure what to make of that.

I'm absolutely starving for new material from Harlan, and I'm sorely disappointed the New Yorker didn't feel the same.

Harlan, one way or another, your tale will get its due. This isn't naive optimism; it's a mathematical certainty.

New Yorker
The New Yorker probably had to reject Harlan's story based on the fact that they couldn't pry open the rusted, dented doors of their ancient facility far enough to submit it. Poor ol' institution has "dain bramage" when it comes to appreciating HE's creativity.

Gotta go to a funeral this week. Grandmother. And I already mourned her loss when she was alive, so there's no need to offer sympathy, condolences or free Arby's coupons; she's had a series of strokes over the years and was failing both physically and mentally for a while, plus she never wanted to live in a nursing home so at least she's out of that hellish environment. The REAL hell of this week will be the fractured family that I'll have to revisit. Name any mental illness, and I'm pretty sure that I can find someone in that bunch who can fit the bill. Here's hoping that I don't get shivved.

Happy belated birthday, Adam. I have not been back on the Internet since Tuesday, so hope you're day was a good one for you and Judy.
Hope everyone continues well and happy. I now have computer table which computer will go on. Then I just have to get siblings aplenty to help reorganize the front room, and I can call cable company to set up cable and Internet on my very own computer in my very own trailer. Then you can all e-mail my kitties, Hootie and Mandy-Oreo. Should you feel a longing to do so.
I'm off. Many friends have made this observation over the years. But in a slightly different context, je pense.
I agree with KOS. We need more silly people here, or else we need our people to be more silly.

For Harlan
I'll be the first to send a e-mail to New Yorker stating my disappointment with their literary editorial choice of not publishing the story you sent.Maybe Vogue?

Gently offered and with no intention of rubbing salt:

4 Things that drive me crazy about the New Yorker:

1. I love Woody and Steve Martin both--that I do, but I have noticed they will publish a napkin that they may have sneezed into as long as they sign it.

2. John Updike, prose master that he was, could only get his exceptionally weak poetry printed in The New Yorker. No other serious poetry magazine would publish it.

3. The legend that was: Jay MacInerney

4. Whenever David Denby thinks he's a literary critic


And to be charitable, 4 things I love about The New Yorker:

1. Seymour Hersch
2. Seymour Hersch
3. Seymour Hersch
4. Seymour Hersch

TALLY: Your wife missed nothing. Part of the deal with the original producers--Hemdale--who settled with me very quickly when we showed them BOTH the "smoking guns" was they paid big on the first film, but I couldn't come against them on any subsequent Terminator films (if ever there should be such a thing). Hemdale is gone, others picked up the franchise, and I have no dog in these subsequent hunts.

Harlan

Just to let y'all know: The New Yorker rejected my new story, "How interesting: A Tiny Man." Pretty much as I expected. ...and the beat goes on.

Harlan

damn -- a forgotten adendum for Sara
DAMN: meant to add this to the post below (I'll absent myself for a week, promise)
SARA: trust me in this: Fewer men refer to a woman (or think of a woman, in their own minds) when they are pissed off at her as a cunt. When men are gathered together and putting down women, bitch is often the word most used. When they want to put another man down, they call him a bitch -- as in someone to be used -- or a pussy (as in a hole to be used). Cunt is pulled out as shock term when all else fails. But when men want to speak of women in derogatory terms, they still weild the word bitch -- and it _still_ retains power (no matter how much women want to try and convince themselves otherwise). It's gained to much power -- from men, who persist in assigning all things feminine a station of weakness -- in the same manner that nigger did well (for similar reasons -- race and gender were used to strip humans of their power and their own humanity, making them something less in the eyes of those -- men -- who want to demean them).
-DTS

Sara's post -- and my last word
SARA: You missed the entire point of my post: by accepting the male-driven denigration of the word, _you_ allow it to take on the meaning they assigned it. In the same manner that women who buy into the "rules" of the bible allow themselves to be subserviant -- because the bible and those trustworthy males(who have no ulterior motives) tell them so. Email Shagin, she'll hip you to a book we both have (published in the 80s) that might shed a bit of light on the subject (the discussion, not the cunni).

And thats my last, um, word on the subject (promise).

Cheers,
DTS

The Whole Ass Caalog
Whee Doggy, but sometimes you all just get to be so entertaining with your go-around's about Bad Movies and Bad Language.

Tje latest about those two words that dare not speak their name, I think y'all may've gone around about three times too awful about the barn. Is that expression even used Down Under?

The Umbrage and High Dudgeon fly so high and thick I can hardly see the sun that is Harlan Ellison on the horizon of the Pavilion.

We rarely have small portions of Righteous Self-Indignation here in the DIning Pavilion (I don't except myself, I am guilty guilty of it betimes), do we?

This is why I dedicate myself to, here on out to infinity and beyond, intentionally or no, being a semi-pure source of silliness when I sojourn hereabouts.

It's sorely needed , from time to time at times such as these times. Of course, that is by my semi-informed opinion. Not that we have any shortage of that around here.

Do we?

The above is, of course, semi-pure silliness.

Jimmy Crack Corn and I don't care.

Skip to my Lou, Bud.

You need not wash the Whole Ass, if you throughly cleanse the Ass Hole.

Feed Me, Jack!

KOS

No, I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to disagree with Shagin and DTS. There are certain words that are used in a particularly vicious manner, and to my mind, cunt is one of them. It's a hard, ugly word, and I have never heard it used in any way other than to demean and denigrate. Cunt is a word designed to strip a woman down to what the user sees her as: a hole that should be filled. It's a word that may not have power over the person to whom it's being said, but it imbues in the user the feeling that if she can be called one, she can be treated like one.

There is no male-oriented term that equates in viciousness. Prick has been de-fanged, like bitch, and is used almost casually; bitch is even used affectionately. Neither of them has the negative power that cunt does.

I would love to see the word de-fanged, but, as with similar words like nigger, kike, spic, etc. I think we have a ways to go. I just don't use them, and have taught my children not to use them.

Is this a new interview or a repeat? Harlan? Anyone?
Repeat.

A program note
Public radio's "Studio 360" just promoed an interview with Harlan coming on their next show (airing the weekend of May 30 in most markets; check your local listings). Judging from the brief snippet of Harlan they aired in the promo - "If I were a plumber and I had fixed 10,000 toilets..." - I think it's just a rebroadcast of the interview they did with him last year. But I'd be happy to be proven wrong if anyone knows differently. Is this a new interview or a repeat? Harlan? Anyone?

Goodbye Lois Lane
Joan Alexander, 94.

CSI
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090523/ap_on_en_tv/us_csi_lawsuit

Thoughts?

The Abrams Tank
Dear Mr. Ellison et al.:

Saw "Star Trek" last night, finally.

Please allow one final kick into the putrefying corpse of that horse--like the one I recommended to this body last week-- representing criticism of all things within this esteemed Pavilion concerning that amusing movie and television franchise that has plagued our critical faculties for the last forty-three years.

To invoke a word our dear host used during an interview IN 1976, on Tom Snyder's "Tomorrow" show, regarding, ironically, a cinematic revival of the ORIGINAL "ST" franchise--"plus la change":

Mediocre.

For a true delight, today I travel to our local Thermopylae of sublime world cinema--The Brattle Theatre in Cambridge--for a Francois Truffaut double feature: "The 400 Blows", and "Stolen Kisses". After paying my respects to my grandfathers, of course. Then, off to our baseball Thermopylae--Fenway Park.

Mr. Ellison: for anything I might humbly contribute to the necessary euthanasia of Mr. Roddenberry's then-noble, but now-tired-seeming idea, do not hesitate to contact me.

As Churchill said of Lenin: "We must strangle the bolshevik menace in its cradle."

A peaceful Memorial Day weekend to all.

William Sherman
Boxford, MA

Words -- closing arguments
SHAGIN: Glad you liked my views -- off and online -- regarding one of my favorite words, and the twisting of worldviews via male-dominated relgions and societies.
CHUCK M: Sorry to see you're happy to perpetuate the problem. Ah, well.

Cheers, all.
-DTS

A Boy and His Dog and Harlan specifically are referenced in a couple of places on this list of top Post-Apocalyptic Movies

http://www.411mania.com/movies/columns/105235

TALLY,

I absolutely refuse to blow my hard-earned cash on another TERMINATOR movie unless there's a scene where Harlan suddenly jumps out from the shadows and eats Christian Bale.

Tom Morgan~ Happy belated birthday, Tom! Plus ça change, eh?

Brian P.~ In the language of my people, that was stone righteous, brother.


I haven't been next door to the BB in a while, and yet... I feel a disturbance in the force. Whatever Rick's done, I'm sure it's in our best interest and the greater good. Thanks for all you do, man. Hope you're feeling at peak.
Three cheers for Mr. Wyatt!! Hear, Hear!

Terminator news
I have no idea if this is an issue since James Cameron wasn't involved, but my wife said that she did not see the acknowledgement to Harlan and his works in the credits of the newest Terminator movie. She MAY have missed it, and I'm not going to waste my ten bucks to verify, but I thought Harlan should be aware that if it was supposed to be noticeable, it wasn't.

Back the shadows and prepping for ConCarolinas next weekend.

DWST Mention
DREAMS WITH SHARP TEETH listed in Entertainment Weekly's "What To Watch" television listings (Eminem on the cover). They don't list too many things, so that's a big deal...

"Do you know what "nemesis" means? A righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent. Personified in this case by an 'orrible cunt... me."

I've wanted to use that line ever since I heard it. Good ol' Brick Top.


Chuck

Errata
Typo in recap. The time is from 2 (TWO) PM to 5 (FIVE) PM.

Thanks,

KOS

BookDelivery Update for HARLAN
Harlan,

I rescheduled my visit to the address in question for the delivery. I will be there tomorrow, from 2 PM until 5 PM. If you would have your assistant deliver the book box to that address I gave you earlier today, between 2 PM and 5 Pm, that would be lovely.

To recap

Place: The address you received from me over the phone, in west LA.

Time: Friday, between the hours of 3 PM and 5 PM.

Should you need to call, the Gallery is listed.

I look forward to the chrestomathy.

Yr. Obdt. Svt.,

KOS

Three rings. It's for Semi...

"Hello?"

"Marge? It's Ethel, Dear."

"Ethel. How good of you to call. I was just thinking about you. How are you, Dear?"

"Fine, fine. And yourself?"

"Doing quite well, really. Went to market, tended the wash. Doing a bit of cunting at the moment."

"Really? How's it going?"

"Oh, it's delightful, but I find I don't have the stamina I once did. You know how that is."

"Poor dear."

"I'm almost ashamed to admit it, but I fell asleep cunting in front of the telly the other night. Imagine my surprise when I woke up."

"Gracious!"

"Well, you know, it's so soothing, especially when you work up a good rhythm, I couldn't help it. Anyway, better to drop off cunting while watching the Beeb than cunting with Father Dunbride. So, today it's a bit of cunting when I can find the time. It's so hard on the hands if you're at it too long. My arthritis and all."

"It takes me forever to find where I left off."

"Arthur says I have quite a knack for it and that I should think on displaying my cunting at the fair this summer."

"What a splendid idea!"

"I'll show you a piece the next time you come around, how's that?"

"Love to, dear. So, the reason I called..."

Brian's post -- and words
BRIAN: Growing up as on Army brat -- and being lucky enough to spend the second half of my adolescence in an idyllic neighborhood (black, white, chicano, polynesian, japanese, etc., etc) -- I lost sight of color/ethnic boundaries long ago. Partly because _I'm_ not black (or brown, etc), probably; partly because somewhere along the way, I became a loner and found myself always looking in from the outside...and having to try and pass, either with the white guys or the black guys (I never got off on cars or demeaning women...and read far too many books, comic or otherwise, to be considered just one of the gang). So your post actually resonates, even though I share the same color of skin with the majority of Amurricans. And that last part -- about the USA being way behind as a society -- is something I've said (and have agreed with) for years (I keep telling the Aussies that they are waaaay ahead of Americans when it comes to a great many things, and they are always surprised to hear it).

In any case, echoing the chorus: great post!

As for words and their power, I'm still in favor of women taking back the derogatory power of cunt. It's never sounded like a put down or an expletive. Bitch, on the other hand -- a word that has become as "playful" as nigger -- still sounds like a putdown (and I still think men use it as a dismissive, which is why it doesn't translate as comedy -- unless one is young and dumb). Cunt is juicy sounding word -- as it should be, since it refers to a particularly tasty morsel -- and should be reclaimed into the world of erotica and prideful femininity.

Cheers,
DTS

Fanboy "Dreams" Review....
Best Line:

"Ellison, like Shaft, is a complicated man."

http://tinyurl.com/px34z6

Brian,

That was an excellent post, thank you so much for sharing your thoughts. I can still remember one of (perhaps the first) time I saw the word nigger in print. It was in the X Men graphic novel "God Loves, Man Kills" where Kitty is called a mutie lover by an unsuspecting boy and she attacks him. When her dance teacher, who is African American, breaks up the fight, she tells Kitty not to be upset because they were just words. Kitty asks her if she would have felt the same way if he had called her a nigger-lover. It was at that moment that my adolescent brain made the connection that X-Men was about far more than superheroes

A-T C, a very happy belated birthday to you

Barber, I am curious, and perhaps this would be better discuss over in the newly redesigned (and quite spiffy looking, nice job Rick) Forums, but what argument was used to justify torture? As I believe I have told you, some conservative friends and I have been having a debate on the subject and it has been rather fun absolutely demolishing their justifications. I was beating one of them so bad at one point I said that debating him on this subject was like kickboxing with a paraplegic, so I was wondering how your discussion went

Mark

Author Lawrence Block was on the Craig Ferguson show this week to promote his new book Step By Step, a memoir. Ferguson asked if there was a new Matt Scudder novel on the way.

Block: I don't know if I'm going to write more novels.

Ferguson: Any more novels at all?

Block: Yeah.

Block, a few sentences later: I've been writing the damn things for 50 years.

TO THE CUTE ELLISON COUPLE: Da Blood Money bin received.

'Tanks.

Youse wants anudder hit made, youse knows where ta fine me.
___________________________________________

SECOND NOTE TO THE CUTE COUPLE: I have both sets of the requested printouts (incl. AMC) and hope to get them into the mail before CB and I leave for the Pacific Northwest. If not, they'll go out next Tuesday.
___________________________________________

Like Keith, I was wowed by Brian's post. This is a prime example of why I love this site. Amidst all the usual madness there are moments of stunning lucidity on topics the rest of the web usually tries to ignore.

Brilliant.
___________________________________________

KEITH - The public does not need to see the pictures, not because to withhold them is untransparent, but because they should a) be used as evidence for prosecution, b) should not be used as political tools for political gain, and c) violates the victim's rights to privacy. Last evening I had a debate with a contractor at the house. He was a great deal more conservative than I expected, but he's a thoughtful conservative.

Even so, he argued in favor of torture, and against closing Guantanamo. He also felt the pictures should be withheld. That alone compels me to reverse my position, but the three reasons I cite above are still fundamentally sound.

The pictures are evidence of a crime, and should be handled as such, not splashed across the front pages of Fox News and the National Enquirer.

Once they are produced in trial, release them to the public. But in any other crime, such a release of prejudicial evidence would be offensive.
__________________________________________

As alluded to above, Cris and I are headed to Seattle for the Bellevue Jazz Fest and a day chasing Orca around Puget Sound (as well as a handful of other "No Opportunity Wasted" sojourns). May even meet up with Sandra for lunch at Ivar's...

News at 11.

Shaddup yew knee-garr kycke...
Being around comics who use anything and everything to get a laugh (and preferably push barriers at the same time), I've only got a problem with verbal language when it's used in a deliberate, heartless derogatory fashion without a callback, twist or other stand-up technique to illustrate why it's used. And I don't care if a naughty word or topic comes into play or not. For example, there's a guy who would--and perhaps still does--go onstage and say, "My two-year-old son is a fag" but then he didn't go anywhere with that line. Call the remark derogatory for homosexuals if you want to be sensitive, but the bigger crime is that he threw out a one-line premise and did no follow-up on it.

Just from a comedic standpoint, you have license to do with language whatever you wish. If you say something that "regular society" would deem inappropriate onstage, whether it's a particular topic or viewpoint or one of Those Bad Words (or as George Carlin said, "no bad words. Bad thoughts, bad intentions...") you'd better be skilled enough to weave it into a real goddamned joke within the next thirty seconds after you spew it. That's what the art is all about.

Personally, I like the word "cunt," partly because of the shock value involved in a woman saying it (tsk, tsk, nice girls don't do that), partly because it brings about quick escalation and plateau in a discussion rather than wasting time on a lower level with "bitch" or "whore," and partly 'cause it's just a cool-sounding four-letter word. Add an -ing to the end of it. G'head, it's fun. But it's not used just to describe women in a derogatory fashion; in the U.K., gender plays no part in its application. It's meant to needle someone, like "git," albeit on a slightly higher level.

Oh, and earthquakes and all, L.A. is having some very nice weather this week. A little chilly with the breezes that are coming off the ocean, though.

Huh. Read the CNN article on the 83-year-old man going to jail for marijuana trafficking, from Georgia to Mexico? There's this quote: "America does not know that the fingers of the cartels are basically around the throat of America," she added, "and it has spread out to rural America just as much as the inner city of Detroit." Sorry to break the news, but it's not 1973. Detroit isn't the drug city to worry about these days, 'cause that city is practically broke and anyone who wants to make money sure as hell isn't pushing major shipments through THERE. Plus it's on Canada's border, and whereas I'm not the best at geography, I'm pretty sure the big flow is coming up from the southern border.

(Damn it. Just lost four hours of work today at $15/hour 'cause the guy I was going to transcribe for was sick. So... how does that call-girl thing work again?)

Keith and Brian,

Some interesting thoughts, and as ever, I find my catch-all rule, Context Is Everything, rules the day once again. The C-word, for instance, is pretty safe to use in the UK, has a different meaning, and always makes me laugh... when it's in that context. In the American context, it always makes me cringe.

The N-word is similar insofar as it can be powerfully loaded or trivial as hell. I remember seeing the Richard Pryor concert film where he talked about going to Africa and swore never to use the word again. He did, eventually, go back to it, which, I guess, proves the point that it's not that simple.

But, like I said, context is everything. If Limbaugh were ever caught using the word in ANY context, it would be richly satisfying to see him beaten to death by a justifiably angry mob. Chris Rock dropping N bombs? Barely noticeable. (And my god, that routine that you mention, Brian, is one of the most amazing examinations of race in America I've ever heard. Powerful and complex and funny and smart and true, and could ONLY come from an African American.)

Like anything, your own context fuels how you feel about it. Kids today, on the whole, don't carry the racial baggage that their elders do. That's a good thing. The word has, I think, been heavily de-fanged. If you grew up in Mississippi in the fifties, it would be wildly different.

As a child of the seventies who grew up in an urban* environment, it was a word I heard regularly, and almost never in the pejorative sense. Part of the empowerment that was going on at the time involved taking the word back, and you could walk down the streets of Philadelphia and see the word in enormous plastic letters on the marquee of the biggest movie theaters in town, playing to mostly Black audiences.

Self-promotion time: Check out my commentary on Fred "The Hammer" Williamson's Boss N***** here:
http://trailersfromhell.com/trailers/357

That commentary elicited a little more email and response than any of the others I've done. Not one complaining about usage of the N word, all of it griping that I called Rush, Coulter and Hannity racists. Happy days.

------------------------
*In the film biz, at least, I've noticed "urban" is the new African-American, which is absolutely hilarious. I wrote a western about a black gunfighter a few years back, and I have read coverage in which it's referred to as an "urban western." No shit.

Brain Fart
Oops.

Brian, I know you're smart, and that must be why I addressed you as "Brain" in my post.

Doh!

-Keith

Wowzers
Brain,

Excellent post. That should be published in a paper in the OpEd pages. As a White person, I do wish I could say the word nigger without looking around and over my shoulder first. Not because I would use it all that much, but I think it is such an ugly word that I would love to use it to describe some of the people I come across. People who cut me off in traffic; people who throw trash out of their windows; people who are rude, in general. Nigger is up there in ugliness with cunt, and I wish it was available for me to use in public.

I have heard Harlan use the word freely, and it sometimes makes me cringe, depending on the context. I have never heard him use it to describe an individual, however, especially one who is Black. I suspect he wouldn't. But you never know with Ellison. You never know.

Steve,

I think you're wrong about the Abu Graib photos. They should all be out there. It is censorship to keep them out of the public domain. The pictures aren't porn, and their publication isn't going to harm any of our troops, any more than putting them in Iraq or Afghanistan in the first place. Obama agreed that more transparency was necessary, and now he's going back on his word. If new photos surfaced of concentration camp victims, or the Cambodian re-education camps, wouldn't we want to see them? Shouldn't we have an obligation to look at them? Just how is Abu Graib different, except that reflects badly on us?

I suspect President Obama's decision to keep the photos unpublished is a political one, and we won't know the full story about it until we read his memoirs. But I hope that whatever deal he made is a good one...because it has cost him some credibility in my eyes.

-Keith

From Subterranean Press
Son of Retro Pulp Tales

"And here's the cover to Joe R. Lansdale and Keith Lansdale's Son of Retro Pulp Tales, with original stories by Joe R. Lansdale (a Dead in the West novelette), David J. Schow's great Donald Westlake homage, Harlan Ellison's uncollected Martian novelette, and a bevy of other tales that play with pulp conventions while being thoroughly modern. We've just started sending the signature pages around, so Retro looks to be right on schedule for its July release."

Brian, very good, thanks for that. We could go into the forums for any further discussions of said topic.

As an Anarchist I understand being an outsider. With Obama being elected, blacks will continue to become mainstreamed--which may not always be a good thing, being that a black cop is still a cop.

The new Tim Wise book outlines the fact that racism is still alive and well, but more subtle. You saw the lack of such a subtleness in these racist tea parties, disguised as tax protests.

I am not saying that Anarchists have the same problem as blacks, but we certainly do get marginalized.

Very thoughtful response. The mooks could learn from ya.

In response to Frank Church
Here is my response to Frank Church and should anyone gripe about the continuation of this discussion, I did say, "...when we meet, let's talk about something else", but Frank does not publish his e-mail and neither do I, so I will respond publicly.

I understand both sides of the argument on the usage of the word
"nigger", because I live, if you will in the middle of the hammock. One tree says, "Use it! It's empowering! We'll defang it!". The other tree says, "It only spreads the hatred that my forbears and I felt".

Another tree says, "Are you saying my apples aren't all their meant to be!?", but we aren't speaking at the moment. He sounds too much like Eugene Pallete. Makes me nervous.

In other words, I am old enough to more than empathize with those people like a Black woman my Cousin Sarah knew who went to work and hung up her coat. A White woman came in after her and took the Black woman's coat off the hook, threw it on the floor and put her coat on the hook. She then wiped her feet on crumpled coat. This happened quite a few years ago, not it Sparta, Mississippi, but in Washington, D.C. Now, the subsequent beat-down that the White woman got, as opposed to the yelling or the reporting to the supervisor that resulted was not just fueled by disrespect or humiliation. I would argue that each blow and kick was for every person that called her "nigger".

I have never been beaten, run out of town, jeered at by crowds with the word "nigger" bouncing off of me, but the word has such a visceral connection with me, I've lived somewhat clenched because of it. Case in point: my Sister-in-Law, Stephanie and I were walking in Solana Beach, CA, an upscale beach town in Southern California. We were laughing and talking to each other and two White people came toward us. They were talking to each other and when they saw us they stopped talking ...


waited for us to pass them...


...and continued talking. Stephanie and I laughed, because we both knew that WE were talking to college students and THEY were scared of two niggers.

So, for me, I don't care for the word. I have used it with friends and family because if you know me and "come correct" as the hipsters say, it doesn't bug me. I also find Chris Rock's routine about loving Black people but hating niggers funny and personally relevant. I suspect that the same familiarity was present when my buddy David (a gay man) saw a particularly effeminate group of guys at our job walking toward us and said to me, "Here come the REAL fags".

I am not young, but I wonder if "nigger" has become something of a plaything to some, like Hester Prynne's daughter playing with the scarlet letter, "A". Lenny Bruce had a routine in which he seemed to bad-mouth everyone, "Are there any niggers here to-night?" He then name-checked a great deal of ethnic groups, as if he was in a poker game, "Are there any wops, any kikes any spics? I'll raise you two wops with a greaser and a hip, funky boogie." Not a direct quote, but you get the idea.

He said that if we could get the words out there and by using them over and over, they would lose their power. Others say that by taking "nigger" back, it is empowerment and by that means, "nigger" loses it's hate value. I see the point of this, too. If I wanted to buy a Rap CD, would I buy one from The Peeved Moors or from N.W.A.(Niggaz With Attitude)? Would I be experiencing hardcore Hip-Hop from The Income-Challenged Men or from the Geto Boys?

Would I buy any of these guys a dictionary? Different post, I suppose.

I see advancement and I see retreat in this area.

Advance: Barack Obama becomes President of the United States.

Retreat: The previous statement is headline news for the wrong reason.

I am elated and my ancestors are smiling down about Obama. Folks, this should have been huge news in the 1970's or, had not Reconstruction imploded, much earlier. The Cosby Show or something like it should have been groundbreaking television in the fifties.

The United States, for all of it's progress, opportunity and wealth is behind. Seriously, tragically, we are at the party, holding a drink and dancing with a lampshade over our heads and covering our eyes.

Another sad thing is that when you think that such base attitudes are on the wane, humans find a way to stir up the pot again. White supremacists are able to persist for a number of reasons, but one of them is that they are not centralized. "The Turner Diaries" (I won't dignify the author by naming him) said that the best way to keep the movement alive was to have various cells across the country. One is discovered, big deal; find the other 540. Suppose you do that, how do they connect up again? The Internet(s) (Hello, Sen. McCain)!

Benazir Bhutto was elected in Pakistan in 1988 (For a short time. Different post.).

Indira Gandhi became Prime Minister in 1966.

The United States was a bit too busy laughing at Shirley Chisholm (that laughter crossed racial lines, by the way)in 1972 and Hillary Clinton was being told to iron shirts on the campaign trail.

Having said all of that, I still believe, as a man of faith and as Orva and Dolores' son that we must turn the corner. I want a woman President, a Jewish President, a Latino President, a homosexual President, an Indian President, etc., because that is us. This is what the USA is made of. It's who we are. We cannot get there with nigger dangling over us. We cannot achieve that knowing that Mr. or Ms. Whomever may have the education AND the smarts, but when the smoke clears they're just another Porto Rickan Communist.

I live and pray for the day that nigger is just a word. A word as antiquated as smellsmock or bullyrag.

And...don't call me a nigger (no caps).

Brian Phillips

Dates of birth
Susan,
Thanks for the reminder, the check for my renewal is in the mail.
Harlan,
Had to think of you as I read the Rolling Stone. I have subscribed because you can get it delivered now for about 50 cents an issue, which probably just about covers postage. Anyway, each issue comes in the mail with an address sticker which is large and white and of course on the front cover. In this case however the sticker is completely removable. It can be peeled off without leaving any of itself behind or taking any of the magazine with it. I can't peel one of those stickers off without thinking of your passionate protests against those damn permanent stickers.
Adam-Troy,
Happy birthday. Got a couple of years on you, as today I become officially one card short of a deck. Hmmm, seems I remember someone else around here coming up exactly a week behing us...

A good day to all here, especially those looking for work. The borg that is Boeing decided recently that they had more than enough engineers in Metrology and my services were no longer required. I was fortunate enough to search far and wide and find a new job all the way across the street, at the Naval Weapons Center in Seal Beach. I know many are still looking and I wish you success.

Thank You for the Update
Dear Mr. Ellison,

Sir, thanks for the update. Await with great eagerness "DWST", as I've repeatedly slaked the thirst on YouTube's excerpts from the movie. (Still kick myself for missing its brief visit to Boston last April.)

Intend, with friends, to hold viewing party.

Hope back has improved.

Regards,

William Sherman
Boxford, MA

my condolences Barney
on the loss of Duppy.

ADAM-TROY:

Susan and I send you deeply-meant birthday words.

Now for the "good" news:

As the days recede, it will get no better. As Hector Berlioz put it, Time is a great teacher. Unfortunately, it kills all its pupils."

And THAT, compadre, is the GOOD news; imagine what Reality will be like.

Otherwise, Yr. Pal, Harlan

REPLY TO WILLIAM SHERMAN

No.

I'm happy you want to see DREAMS WITH SHARP TEETH, in fact I'm delighted, but no, HERC won't be selling it. The license was granted to NewVideo, and I would be a penny-ante and churlish thug were I (or HERC) to impinge on their deal with Erik Nelson and Creative Differences. I urge you, all a-smile, with clean hands and composure, to patronize the usual purveyors for a copy, about a week from now, the 26th. Or just watch it on the Sundance Channel on or about that same date, I'm certain we've conveyed the specific info about half a dozen times, last 4 months. But, no, kiddo, HERC is not an option this time.

Yr. Pal, Harlan

Just a Happy Birthday shout-out to Adam-Troy Castro!

Many more, I hope.


Chuck

ATC: HAPPY ANOTHER YEAR OLDER, AND STILL OLDER THAN ME!

***

BRIAN: "Black - Habitually gets a lower case "B". Outside of being as wildly inaccurate as White"

Spider Robinson has a wonderful commentary about "Black" in (I believe) Callahan's Legacy (I could be wrong, I'm not at home to check the book). An Irish fae is bemoaning the choice of the word "Black" to describe the features, when there are so many wonderful colors that are included.

And thank you for the comment about "African music". That is a pet peeve of mine, much like "Russian music". Um...labels are sometimes useful, but don't lump so many choices together or you spoil the experience.


shagin

FROM THE INSTITUTE OF HUMAN UNDERSTANDING:alan MASTERS
I was over at a party last night of a friend I hadn't seen in years doubling my money on the ping-pong table and playing in the background on MTV was a special on "WE ARE THE WORLD" years past and remembering the experience was Sir Bob Geldoff talking about the 180 million raised and the problem they had getting the food and clothing to the famine relief organizations due to the authoritarian regime grabbing the goods and selling it to bordering countries for guns and other supplies.Not to mention alot just rotting at the cargo depot.Then in comes Bono saying how it was the fault of United States for not putting military might behind UN forces already responsible for delivering said life saving supplies.
Mind Flash one:
Seeing U2 in mid-concert Bono half way out on the spider like stage extensions arms in chained and bound terror-mate above head pose says as band leads into Peter Gabriel's "BIKO"
"United States please don't kill us." The bass and drum take the heavy beat almost fever pitch as Bono sings about the South African conscience prisoner Steven Biko.
I'm forming the words in a whisper as i continue to hold the table-Fuck You,FUCK YOU!
Mind Flash two:
Sometime back in '87 remembering another awards show giving Peter Gabriel,Sting,and Michael Stipe Lifetime Humanitarian Awards for their work in smuggling hand held video cameras in and out of South Africa which in turn led the then son of President of S.A. to come forward and announce his plan to wed Black woman he impregnated and not abort child.This leading to said Prez calling special session calling for removal of Apartheid ways.
Don't you hate when this happens.

Brian Phillips, I notice there is one word you forgot to mention--you know, the one starting with a big N. What do you think about the debate surrounding that word and the irony of Paul Mooney refusing to ever use it again, while Michael Eric Dyson and Randall Kennedy, two professors defend its use, as does Henry Louis Gates Jr.?

I prefer crackerfiedhonkiebisquit. Party likes its 1649.


---------------

Adam Troy Castro, Uncle Fidel just got off the phone with me. He sends his regards as well as a full box of cuban cigars. Only the best for the best.

Happy Birthday Mr. Castro and Hello, Steve!
1. ...and many returns of the day.

2. To Steve: Caucasian - Capital C. "Negro" - Capital N. African-American - Capital A's.
Black - Habitually gets a lower case "B". Outside of being as wildly inaccurate as White, I don't mind the term "Black", in terms of race, but when writing about the various people referred to as Caucasian people or the peoples that make up my ethnicity, I capitalize "White" and "Black" to be fair.

African-American is a good enough term, although, as you point out, rather inaccurate. A fellow I knew said he didn't like "African music". What the deuce is that? That's a lot of different folks and genres and to address an earlier post by Net Nanny, the misnaming of various sects of people isn't always a White folks' game. Sometimes an anthropologist would go to a country with several peoples and they would ask a person, "What do you call yourselves?" and they would answer with a name that would have grand and noble meaning. If the anthropologist was being less than thorough, they would ask in the same village, "Who are the people that live in the next village?" and they would reply with a derogatory name.

So, in some textbooks, "The Great People Near the Stream" would be closely bordered by "The Nose-Picking Dullards".

Why do I like African-American? It denotes a place of origin, although, if Leakey is correct, there are more Af-Ams about than you think. It's better than "colored" (who hath not color, save Percy Faith?) and it's ALWAYS capitalized. As my Uncle Manny pointed out to me, seeing the small "B" in Black is sort of demeaning. "Negro" is kind of like "Hottentot" in it's origin.

So, here's to African-American, but when you see me, call me Brian and let's talk about something else.

For the (I hope) Greater Good, I'm Brian Phillips.

Adam-Troy Castro

Many Happy Returns of the day! Or, as Owl writes,
"HIPY PAPY BTHUTHDTH THUTHDA BTHUTHDY!"

HAPPY-GO-LUCKY
Awarding myself a second post because my first was a one-liner; if this is wrong, I apologize, but I seize the opportunity to discuss a movie other than STAR TREK.

Movie watched last night: Mike Leigh's HAPPY-GO-LUCKY, a showcase for the divine Sally Hawkins.

It's two hours of cheer, deceptively shapeless but in fact cunningly constructed, about an incessantly happy kindergarten teacher named Poppy, whose upbeat nature (deliberately) crosses the line between charming and annoying. Poppy is always
grinning ear to ear, always giggling; she reacts to the theft of her sole source of transportation, a bicycle, with a rueful but amused "Oh no," without being much bothered about it. She's so very cheerful, in fact, that she grins and giggles her way through a painful chiropractic treatment after injuring her
back, finding it funny when she hurts. Nothing, it seems, can faze this woman. And you understand why some of the people she deals with turn away: a little of this lady goes a long way.

But, you know what? The film is deeper than it seems to be at first glance, and is less about keeping your head held high than about the situations such nonstop cheer cannot touch. One of them is her relationship with her driving instructor, an incredibly embittered man who is to gloom and anger what she
is to happiness. The scenes of them bouncing off one another -- and his increasing frustration of being able to get past her cheery enjoyment of their lessons -- are hilariously funny. And if you think that she teaches him a valuable life lesson, you are wrong. The movie has more on its mind than that. Poppy's upbeat attitude doesn't reach or redeem everybody she encounters. It doesn't solve all her problems. It doesn't give her an identifiable happy ending. And it doesn't stop her from having the bad experience capable of reaching even her. It just
makes her life worth living.

Computer games and John Podhoretz
First of all, a reply to Adam-Troy Castro, who urged a more lenient attitude towards Podhoretz's article. I disagree. Yes, Poddy Jr.'s point about the differences in the story values is valid, but I think it's one of those points that is evident to a lot of people-- and not especially striking. True, but not especially novel: I could hear that same point from dozens of other commentators. (And I'd probably hear it with more verve and brio than in Poddy Jr.'s somnambulist prose.) Maybe you see perceptiveness and sagacity, but I don't see any special reason to lift my fatwah against Poddy Jr. because he managed a trick that a stopped clock accomplishes twice a day. Otherwise, the man is a worthless dope.

Okay, now for computer games. I've been hashing over the question of whether computer games can be an art form comparable to movies or novels. I haven't written up my ideas yet, but in the meantime, there's this piece from the _Telegraph_ that discusses some of the more striking games that have attempted to be more than thumb-flexers and bloodbaths.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/books/bookreviews/5291671/Endpaper---Fiction-reaches-a-new-level.html

I mention it here because of this paragraph:
"Veterans of home computing in the Eighties and Nineties may recall knotting their brows over the game of The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, written by Douglas Adams himself. Adams also wrote Bureaucracy, a game in which the paper-shuffling protagonist’s most pressing task is to avoid succumbing to a brain haemorrhage from stress. And the veteran sci-fi novelist Harlan Ellison delivered I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream, a game whose vision of eternal torture remains more shocking than most of its high-resolution descendants."

The article also mentions a few of my favorites,such as _Stalker: Shadow of Chernobyl_ and the amazing _Bioshock_.

If anyone's interested, I could write up what I've been hashing in my mind, about computer games as an art form; we do have some serious working artists on this website, and it'd be nice to bounce ideas around.

Surprisingly, NOT feeling grumpy today
49 years into mortal existence.

Ho Ho Ho
The Internet is My Friend. Who knew such graphic evidence existed that Frank Church is Wrong?

http://tinyurl.com/FrankIsWrong

KOS

Sioux Me
The term Sioux literally means snake eater, a name given by the Cheyenne to the Lakota people. This was another marvel accepted by whitey. (Also round eyes has never been used by any NA.)

Most "tribe" names mean 'the people' or 'people of the earth' in their own languages. And please don't get me started on squaw.

A Viewing of YouTube
Dear Mr. Ellison et al.:

Just a quick line or two. Watched two postings broadcasting Mr. Ellison's Q & A session at The New Beverly Theatre, in March, regarding a just-completed screening of "A Boy and His Dog". Enjoyed Mr. E.'s enlightening commentary about both the movie, its antecedent novella, the backstory of said novella, and his comparing the two works.

Regret I could not attend (and buy the audio tape of Mr. E.'s recording for $15).

On another note, and dumb question, might one purchase a copy of "DWST" through HERC?

Regards,

William Sherman
Boxford, MA

All of y'all okay?
I just read there was another quake in L.A.

Cindy

Politically Incorrect

Um. At the risk of being thought a net-nanny, "Indians' is a white man's term, too. Those folks waiting when the Great Nations of Europe put their boats ashore called themselves a whole buncha things: Cree and Choctaw and Cherokee and Sioux and all like that, but the round-eyes called them "Indians" because they were lost. Even the name of the place is a screw-up. America? He was the map-maker ...

A Native American is somebody who was born in America, near as I understand the definition, which would make a whole bunch of redneck crackers, Your Truly included, those.

(And which makes "African American" one of those unintuitive terms . Yeah, I know what it means, but ...)

Some of my best friends are seahorses, she averred sentimentally with a beaming rogueish grin. And they can have some damn good insights sometimes.
Glad all seem to have survived the earthquake in good shape, or unbroken shape anyways. Though I found L.A. breathtakingly beautiful and fascinating, I'm pretty sure my fear of the ground shaking under my feet would keep me resident in Chicago. Although once in the early 70s, we did have a feelable quake here. I was 10 or 11, and it awakened me.
Harlan and Susan and any L.A. folks who care, my return trip to L.A. is still on, but postponed to later in summer, because older nephew has summer school, to which he has pledged attendance, younger nephew has Little League or sum such to attend, and niece and aforesaid younger nephew have been wrestling with bouts of strep throat. So later summer.
Adam-Troy, in light of lifting your mood, you could reflect that you are a published author. As someone who has the best ideas all the time, but never fracking finishes anything, you can compare and contrast yourself to me with great profit. You are a published author. That is like so way cool. If I were in your shoes, I'm fairly sure that is all I would go around saying to anyone.
Jan, I check in on the SPIDER forum regularly, but cannot post for arcane computer reasons. Probably A.M. getting in there and mucking up the works. Either that or gremlins. However, I have decided not to do anything, until I buy my own computer, rig same at my abode, and then I will beg help of Steve to help me log on proper-like. At which time, you all will probably start sending me e-mails begging me to shut up on the forums, cause I am a verbose type thing, and LITERATURE is my thing. I was one of those pretentious English majors in college.
Hope all are well. Hang in there everyone.
Love, Diane
P.S. (Told youse I was verbose.) Fracking is my new favorite word, because Battlestar Gallatica is my new favorite show. How I missed this for the last several years, I don't know; but I am renting the episeds from Blockboster and am in love. With the show, the writing, and Edward James Olmos. But I have loved him for several years. Hopelessly unrequited. There you go. DB

I doubt Edith Keeler hung out with Ho Chi Minh.

Guilty Pleasures
We all have them, those things that are just silly, or too easy or perhaps tric\vially insignificant, or plain childlike but pure fun to indulge in.

Poking fun at the latest position statement of a Southern politician is always good.

Radio and TV Preachers are especially useful for this.

Not to mention whack jobs of all stripes who act as if their bloviations are on a par with the Sermon On Tne Mount.

Mine though, ah yes, MYYYYY Guilty Pleasure is such a case of "Shooting Fish In A Barrel" that I believe it raises the bar to levels way beyond the norm, way above the ozone and well into the Moronosphere.

I work mostly late at night. I tune a radio to the only LA area station that comes in clearly after midnight, KFI. I use it as "sound carpeting" as I work.

KFI's late nght talk show is sui generis
/
It's "Coast To Coast AM", the old "Art Bell Show". If I am in the mood, or the work is not going well, I call them.

If in a good mood, I engage the voodoo priest of the night (Richard C. Hoagland, he of "The Face On Mars" and Nutball of the First Order, is a regular on the show and a particular favorite for this gambit) and engage her/him in excited fan boy adulatrory chit chat, slowly leading them down a garden path to some stunning piece of revelatory idiocy, ofen picking some favorite trope from a hoary old science fiction story, and presenting it to the mook as some of the latest "Cutting Edge Research" that said Mook ought know of. One night, years ago when Bell was still hoasting, I had his featured guest telling me he was well aware of the "secret" CIA project to build an AI called an "Adaptive Manipulator", and that he of course thought it (after I asked his opinion) "dangerous folly" to allow it access to our nuclear codes. He even admitted that he was deeply involved in the fight to thwart this Satanic Plan. To show his bona fides he even corrected my proonunciation of "Nukular".

Ah, but then come the nights I am NOT in a Particularly Good Mood. On Those Nights, I call and talk circles around the knuckleheads. Like the time I asked Hoagland, the "Official Science Adviser" to the show, "What's Plancks Constant?". After his total collapse into incoherence had subsided, I followed up with "Are you familiar with Thiotimoline and the experiiments therewith indicating time slippage as a physical reality?"

He assured the audience he most surely was, and went on for several minutes as to the implications for Time Travel and Hyperdimensional Physics.

Several subsequent callers asked for more information, but none mentioned Isaac Asimov.

.Actually, while full of warm fuzzies, I don't feel any guilt. None At All!

KOS

Addendum (Sigh)
Aside, that is, from the idiocy that had "City" a pro-Vietnam parable; I am referring to his comparison of the story values.

Tsk, Tsk
Brian: just as our dearest friends and even our role models might be full of shit sometimes, those who hold positions we would fight to our last breath are sometimes capable of presenting their thoughts with perceptiveness and sagacity. It's unseemly, I think, to attack Podhoretz when what he said, in this particular case and on this particular subject, was intelligent, critically adroit, and complimentary to our host.

Andy Griffith
Apparently Sen. Hendren doesn't know that Andy Griffith has a well-documented record of supporting (shhh!) Democratic politicians. The senator certainly hasn't seen this widely disseminated pro-Obama video from last year's campaign, featuring Griffith, Ron Howard and Henry Winkler:

http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/cc65ed650d/ron-howards-call-to-action-from-ron-howard-and-henry-winkler

"Interesting review comparing and contrasting "City on the Edge of Forever" with the latest Star Trek foray. It's by John Podhoretz in "The Weekly Standard". I'd be interested in your comments, if any."

Only rational comment anyone can make: "John Podhoretz is Norman Podhoretz's son and a former minion to Sun Myung Moon, both of which qualify him to be ignored for all eternity by all organisms smarter than a seahorse. May he never reproduce."

Looking forward to watching _Dreams with Sharp Teeth_, and whah-tha-hell, I'll mention that I liked the Star Trek movie.

DWST Review
Another great review of DREAMS WITH SHARP TEETH from AMC:

http://www.filmcritic.com/misc/emporium.nsf/reviews/Dreams-with-Sharp-Teeth

Semi, Quayle was a red-head??? Maybe I'm blocking the memory, but all of a sudden I'm embarrassed for redheads everywhere.

Adam-Troy Castro
A-T C, I envy you your scowling... mine own mood has been most unpleasant--a black cloud laced tainted with disgust for my inability to produce anything publishable. That, plus living with those damned ingrained Midwestern morals that prevent me from following a path of larceny, prostitution, illegal trafficking or Mexican donkey-love as a means of survival. Self-loathing is SO unattractive.

The whole "Andy Griffith" remark is galling on so many levels, particularly in that the overtones remind me of the "Murphy Brown" single-mom gaff that our red-haired VP made way back yonder in history (okay, the early '90s). Yea, that's great. For examples of what American life is and/or should be, and to condemn the parts we don't like, let's hold up TELEVISION! Ye Olde "Glass Teat," as HE described the little box-beast. Let us indulge in intellectual discussions about the merits of the remake of "Beverly Hills 90210" with a clear conscience, brothers and sisters...

"Climb out of your holes, people!" G'dgod. Life was never John Boy and Laura Ingalls. It was never The Monkees and Maude (though I daresay that I have a few relatives that bear a strong resemblance to Archie Bunker). To claim that "The Andy Griffith Show" was representative of American morals is the height of blissful ignorance--by the tone of the remark, he seemed to revel in the notion that that particular image WAS America. Uh, he might want to talk to the Indians on that one. Remember them? They were here first. (Comedian Charlie Rich made a point of clarifying to me once, "We're Indians. Native Americans is a white man's term.")

Hendren v. Schumer
Sen. Hendren's "clarification" raises a potentially interesting question: is the 'distinguished gentleman' aware that The Andy Griffith Show was produced by Sheldon Leonard, created by Aaron Ruben, and had many episodes co-written by Everett Greenbaum? I believe the Senator's reaction to this information might be worth seeing...

Going Boldly

Unca Harlan,

Interesting review comparing and contrasting "City on the Edge of Forever" with the latest Star Trek foray. It's by John Podhoretz in "The Weekly Standard". I'd be interested in your comments, if any.

http://www.weeklystandard.com/Content/Public/Articles/000/000/016/460tgnzy.asp

Sundance intro
A very nice intro marred by the dreaded 'off of'.

"Artists are sick to death of trying to pay their bills off of jobs that “offer great exposure.”"

Docurama has "Dreams With Sharp Teeth" DVD
Following the link that "Clipping Service" supplied (and thank you CS, love your brother Lewis) to watch clips of DWST, takes you here:
http://www.docurama.com/productdetail.html?productid=NV-NNVG154121

Brian Phillips

Various
Amazon.com is misbehaving today. Author searches, even title searches, are providing random lists of unrelated books. Anybody trying to buy one of my books will not be able to pull it up and will instead pull up one of Ralph Nader's. Formidable.

*

The documentary on my life, NEUROSES WITH BLEEDING GUMS, is still in production.

*

Harlan called with concern to inquire over the bad mood I mentioned yesterday, a convenient thing since I had a matter I needed to discuss with him anyway; as I might have scared a few other people here, I report with measured gravity that had I descended into a pit of truly stygian despair I would have said so. I was just in a bad mood. Grumpy. Generally pissed off. The weight of life's various indignities generally irritating me. Transportation woes. The burden of an endless project, the third Andrea Cort novel, which has been more of a struggle than usual -- seven months and counting, with only 3/4 done -- getting on my nerves. These and other concerns sometimes render my demeanor a little less than perpetually sunny, even though, to my astonishment, I seem to have picked up a reputation as a constantly cheerful guy. But that's a far thing from being, you know, depressed or despairing. I was just scowling for a bit.

*

To date, I have seen all of the James Bond movies.

I have never mistaken them for good movies, but they are among the pleasures picked up in childhood to which I remain vulnerable decades later. Later, if you want, we can discuss great works of cinematic expression, even great adventure films. But this is not that discussion.

I have seen the vast majority that were just campy kinetic fluff. I have seen the couple that I think worked fitfully; I have seen the couple, like the Timothy Dalton films, that were so dull I didn't ever want to see them again. I have seen the few, like DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER and A VIEW TO A KILL, that were just lackluster and tired. I have seen those, like MOONRAKER, that were really appalling pieces of shit with a few genuinely eye-popping action sequences. I saw one, OCTOPUSSY, that everybody hates that I kinda like for its campy verve. I have seen the one, CASINO ROYALE with Daniel Craig, that I think works as a genuinely good film.

I have now seen QUANTUM OF SOLACE.

I had heard, from sources including our host, that it was bad.

And I report only that it was only James Bond film, to date, where I did not give a shit what was happening, even theoretically, at any point: where I did not thrill to any action sequence; where I did not want Bond to win.

One exception: Dame Judi Densch, who took over the part of "M" during, I believe, the Pierce Brosnan era, remains interesting even in uninteresting outings. Her coldness to Bond, and her open disdain for him, have at times made her an antagonist -- and is always redeemed by a moment where, without anything as sloppy as catharis, the mask slips and she reveals a concern
for him that should never be mistaken for affection.

Of course, this is BETTER in the good outings. The single best acting moment in CASINO ROYALE had her look disturbed and taken aback, when Bond said, of the woman he had loved, "The bitch is dead." (An Ian Fleming line, by the way.)

But if you wanna see what that actress can really do, check out NOTES ON A SCANDAL, where she's repellent and mesmerizing.

*

You want a good time? Stand your Edith Keeler action figure on your hot wheels track.

*

I just found out from the Sunday paper that an enterprising travel agency is now booking AMAZING RACE tours under another name, complete with competing teams, tasks that must be completed, an itinerary that participants only find out on
a day-by-day basis, and a videographer who provides you with an edited version afterward. 8, 10 and 14 days tours are available. You can even compete against past winners of the show. No million-dollar prize, alas.

www.competitours.com

*

After publicly referring to Senator Chuck Schumer (NY) as "that Jew," Arkansas State Senator Kim Hendren (Republican, of course), backpedaled and explained,

"I was attempting to explain that unlike Sen. Schumer, I believe in traditional values, like we used to see on 'The Andy Griffith Show."

So, digging himself deeper by saying Jews don't believe in "traditional" values, he defends himself by invoking an old TV show about a town where every single adult male was middle-aged and unmarried.

*

Currently reading: HONOLULU, by Alan Brennert.

Well, Iiii'll be!
My wife & I were so wrapped up in our own little concerns yesterday that I was wholly unaware that anything untoward had occurred in So'Cal' until I entered the Pavilion this morning--my first reaction being "Earthquake? There was an earthquake?" (Sorry, for the run-on sentence.) I'm glad to read that all seems to be well.

Harlan, that's interesting. When everyone's asleep and I walk around S.P.I.D.E.R.'s empty halls and caverns to think, I sometimes hear faint echoes of crazy, suppressed giggling. It seems to emanate from the ancient lower corridors which people don't return from.

Harlan-

Thanks for sending the DVD to Oceania. I'll have my fiancee (yep, she's been upgraded) drop a check/money order/dead gopher in the mail for the newsletter when she's back in the states in about six weeks.

And now I return to lurking, waiting patiently for the next volume of 'Voice From The Edge' and the final piece of our trade...

--
Ryan

Erm...
...around "in" my head...

Yeah, that's it....

Nice words...
From the Sundance Channel Web Shrine Page:

"Harlan Ellison is easily agitated. You can’t really be sure of what will set him off on a tirade – but you can be sure that his reasoning will be sound.

So we will introduce him as a writer/author – and occasional hell raiser. Hopefully that cautious and broad intro will not incite a verbal attack from him. To the literati, Harlan Ellison is the author and/or editor of countless, much lauded short stories, novels, novellas and anthologies. To the couch-potato clickers of the world, Harlan Ellison matters to you because he served as creative consultant for the 1980’s version of The Twilight Zone, as conceptual consultant for Babylon 5 in the 1990’s and wrote one of the most popular episodes of Star Trek (The City on the Edge of Forever) among his vast body of television credits.

And, finally, to artists of all genres – Harlan Ellison is a loud, irascible and vehement voice for respect and payment. He is the rare combination of a well-developed artistic mind combined with exquisite business smarts and an innate sense of unwavering justice. Ellison dares, in one of his rants, to speak out against a major film studio who wanted to re-release material involving him on DVD. When asked to be paid for his participation, the young assistant seemed shocked. A highly unfortunate reaction on her part – as she then became the target for a giant Harlan Ellison emotional whipping. Did she expect her gas station attendant to give her free gasoline? Her doctor to perform surgery for free…and did SHE, in fact work for free?

Artists are sick to death of trying to pay their bills off of jobs that “offer great exposure.” Harlan Ellison laments the fact that professional writers are constantly being undercut by amateurs these days… and he’s right. It might behoove all of us to listen to Harlan’s rants in DREAMS WITH SHARP TEETH and re-inspire ourselves as a nation to “get what we pay for” and maybe bump up our standards a little.

Harlan Ellison matters because whether in his work or in his life, he delves into specifics… deep details that - whether describing a stabbing victim in one of his stories or discussing his own lawsuits and finances - make us all a little uncomfortable when we face the deep truths uncovered."

Read for yourself:

http://tinyurl.com/p4v5u9

They've really done a good job, here.

i was once chastised by mr. ellison for drawing illustrations for his story, the prowler in the city at the edge of forever. to be fair, he did apologize when i explained that i had done the drawings in order to GET his approval. that was 30 odd years ago, and my work has improved a great deal. i have illustrated (with his approval), w.s. merwn's east of the sun west of the moon. i would still like the opportunity to illustrate the prowler story. thanks, michael gorman

More rare video Harlan:

This is a short clip of Harlan talking about Kent State. I guess this is from a local station in Ohio:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0aM9IB1MD-c

This is why we should show the torture pictures. We had to know what happened at Kent State, we must also know what is done in our names.

Sundance Channel's
"Dreams With Sharp Teeth" shrine is now UP and running!!

http://www.sundancechannel.com/digital-shorts/

Clips galore!!

HE's Dream Corridor Ltd. Ed. HC on sale @ TFAW
Harlan Ellison's Dream Corridor Ltd. Ed. HC on sale at thingsfromanotherworld.com - was $69.95 now $20.98. This limited edition had a run of 750 copies. SIGNED BY HE.

http://www.tfaw.com/Promos/Spring-Cleaning/Profile/Harlan-Ellison%27s-Dream-Corridor-Ltd.-Ed.-HC-Nick-|and|-Dent___322571

JAN: I often visit the SPIDER forum but seldom feel qualified to comment on any of the threads. I dunno, doing so would seem akin to an amoeba remarking to a human about "that nice spine thing ya got there."

Then again, I will admit to a recent fascination with Harlan's titles, although I'm often sidetracked by reading the stories themselves. I roll the titles around him my head much like you would savor a favorite icecream, picking out the nuances that linger after the words are gone.


shagin

Details at Eleven

Uncle H --

Whoa -- you threw Connie Willis's breasts down an elevator shaft? Damn, I missed that one ...

I saw Angels and Demons today, very entertaining with a number of twists and turns I was not expecting. It is more violent than I expected for those a bit quemish and I certainly would hesitate taking a child younger than high school age. In an interview I saw with Tom Hanks talking about the movie, he said they actually filmed some of this during the previous movie he did in Rome. They were concerned they could not get permission to shot in some of the areas they were filming if it was done after the first movie was released.

Stop Quaking in yr Boots
The Northridge quake; that was the one which ended my father's livelihood, as I recall. It was that temblor, or one of the others, that prompted the pigs to seal off a warehouse full of newspaper-making equipment (so it could be stolen by thuggish rivals) until eventually an arsonist finished off the rest. Gosh-durned quakes, eh?

Don't mention 'em.

That big one we had up here in '98, now that was one crusher of a hassle. It closed off the bay bridge for seemingly forever, prompted a complete reexamination of that type of double-decker freeway which was once common here, and saw me standing in a hotel doorway in my skivvies for a few hyper moments.

Oh yes, I neglected to mention that earthquakes, to me, resonate with the soft thudlike sound of writers bouncing off the stairwell.




(I shall be silent anon. Two days. Perhaps more if I'm thrown bodily from the top step.)

Hey Mr Barber
Be thankful that there are no aftershocks, they can be worse thant the quake that caused 'em.

For some strange reason, a line from a Jimmy Buffett song jumped to mind when I read your post:


"...It's a shake and bake life with the quake; the answer's in the crust..." from Fruitcakes

Glad to hear that the only thing that got hurt was your china collection. You and Cris were the first to come to mind when I heard about it this AM.

Love and lots of it

Lori

DUANE:

Sell it, baby! Sell it!

To the chorus, kid ... you're preachin' to the scared-as-shit chorus! Amen, brother. I was at the top of the mountain, right above you. But, well, y'all know my story on this one.

Sell it, sweetheart: the rest'a these woosies all over the non-shake'n'break U.S. haven't a cuh-LOOOOO.

Still Tremblin', Yr. Pal, Harlan

ADAM-TROY:

In ridiculous fact, bro, I own (still in their pristine bubble-paks) the trio of "City" action figures: Spock, wearing the watch-cap; Kirk; and Sister Edith Keeler. What this tells us, I have no idea. I just call 'em as I have long-ago bought 'em.

Yr. Pal, Harlan

These temblors are like little time machines for me. I was living in Van Nuys when the Northridge quake hit, and I thought the world was coming to an end.

The freakiest thing, aside from the, literally, MONTHS of aftershocks, was stepping outside my house into a nightmare of blaring car alarms, quaking ground, and a darkness illuminated by a view of the sky not seen since southern California belonged to the Chumash. It was as if the city had passed through a portal and a new atavistic reality had taken hold.

So whenever there's a little shake, a part of my caveman brain lights up like a Vegas billboard, and for a split second it's sabertooth tigers all over again.

JAN:

The answer to your query to Rick anent his "not getting your e.mail" may have been serendipitously answered about 10 minutes ago when I called Rick to find out if (as Ryan Leasher advised me just below) he had gotten Ryan's e.mail.

Rick hmmm'd a moment, then said, "I'll bet -- since Ryan's never sent me an e.mail before -- that my 'spam scooper'--"

(I THINK that was the term Rick used, or something much like it)

"grabbed it. Let me look, hold on ... yeah, there it is!" And he read it to me. Mayhap, Jan, because Rick is anything but overlookingly dismissive, or ungracious, that he simply has a hyperthyroidal spam sifter. I suggest someone who has contacted Rick in the past, via e.mail, get the word to him...from you.

Sometimes the simplest answer is the correct one.

By the way: I find those S.P.I.D.E.R. threads fascinating, and sometimes giggle-inducing. But always smart and provocative. And I would go to them, if Rick and I could finally figure out a code or codex or rolex or whatsoever that would accept my name as a legitimate respondent. So I just stay away, because 1) I get frustrated at being locked out, and 2) I think most of you folks feel safe from my prying eyes and, with maybe only on e or two exceptions over the years, I do not lurk, I do not go.

But what Jan is doing over there gladdens my heart.

I know the average duck-waddle is more catchbreathed about Connie Willis's breast or bodies thrown down elevator shafts than they are about why the lights flicker in Jeffty's house before Donny rushes upstairs to the bathroom ...

But, frankly, as I've said repeatedly over the decades, I do not seek the approbation of monkeys. And Jan's S.P.I.D.E.R. Forums go directly to the soul of what I egomaniacally worry about: will Posterity give a shit?

So, thank you, thank you, Jan. You do De Lawd's Work, and Academe's as well.

Yr. Pal, Harlan

RYAN LEASHER:

Rick got the NZ address to me. DVD goes out today.

Susan says it's the same, re the renewal: $15 for 6 issues. She also suggests, if you find yourself with a remaining cache of US bills, send the cash ... much less complex than international money-changing efforts and alla that rigamarole.
Cash plays; alternatives lays.

Yr. Pal, Harlan

DTS & The Fall
I have seen The Fall a few times. I love it. Visually, it is stunning. The story(s) is/are interesting. The use of the second movement from Beethoven's Second Symphony is inspired. On my top 20 list I'd put it somewhere near Songs from the Second Floor, which, if you haven't seen, I also highly recommend.

BOB INGERSOLL:

Thanks, kiddo. No harm, no foul. I'll send it to Tim Richmond for any possible use in FINGERPRINTS ON THE SKY.

(Yeah, come to think of it...at what stage of "soon to be published" IS that behemoth?)

Tim? Quest-ce ca c'est?

Yr. Querulous Pal, Harlan

Harlan,

Read the details of your Trek suit only now.

They're incredible idiots, and I wish you swift results.

I didn't KNOW Simon & Schuster belonged to Paramount - through its Pocket Books division yet. Endless landscapes of merges!

But...
...I would almost buy that Edith Keeler figurine, so I could have hours of fun playing with it. And my remote-control truck.

Just...
...randomly pissed off today.

Edith Keeler Figurine
Harlan:
I imagine you know this but I wasn't aware there was a Trek Edith Keeler figurine...

Being auctioned on EBay:

http://shop.ebay.com/?_from=R40&_trksid=p3907.m38.l1313&_nkw=edith+keeler+figure&_sacat=See-All-Categories

Rock and Roll

The quake hit Long Beach harder than most cities, but still minimal damage at our house. Rather than the usual roll, this one had a slight shake followed by a strong wallop that last for only a few seconds. My own reaction was that it went by so fast it could have been an explosion instead of an earthquake (we live only a few miles from the Wilmington oil refineries and experienced exactly this sort of blast effect fifteen or so years ago.)

Given that we also live under the flight path for Long Beach Airport we had a couple of good suspects.

For you outsiders, a 4.7 is pretty mild. The ground underneath Long Beach tends to be spongier though, enhancing this sort of smaller tremor instead of absorbing it. During the Landers/Big Bear twin earthquakes Long Beach was the only city in the LA area with minor but noticeable damage.

But again, a 4.7 threw a few plates from the shelf and scared the cat.

What is more worrisome is the lack of aftershocks. This could portend a bigger shaker in the works, so for us locals: if you haven't updated your Earthquake Kits and stocked up on water, this might be a good time.

SPIDER (Harlan may skip this)
Or to ask a more basic question:
Do we *want* to discuss and survey Harlan's oevre at all?
Does everybody feel inept at talking about literature? Why is that? Literature is for the people. Whatever you don't understand you just admit you don't understand and perhaps somebody else does.
Some of us have disagreed with opinions expressed in Harlan's essays and disliked some stories of his - no big deal - not for us, not for Harlan.
Are we honest, feeling, intelligent readers with opinions and thoughts of our own or are we just here to suck up to the master, accept everything he does and says and writes, and tell him how great he is? (He said provocatively.)

The truth is that, by and large, Harlan's (and most genre writers) works do not receive very much attention here or anywhere else on the net or outside - most of the attention these days is directed at Harlan's personality or particular works like the computer game, Harlequin, Boy and His Dog, Nelson's film, or the Trek episode. To my knowledge SPIDER is the only place that collects thoughts and information (some of it contributed by Harlan when we ask him) on ALL his stories and books. I know it doesn't look like much now, but a few years ago it wasn't there at all. If all of us, who are interested, carry a little bit of the responsibility, it will change and grow. (One day we will also have a newer software.)
The other thing I feel strongly about is that SPIDER be fun. So if we can't find a way for you to see the fun in exploring Harlan's world, his art and his ideas, his triumphs and failures, then there is of course no need for the forum anymore.

Regarding myself, I want to make clear, as I did in the beginning, that I consider it my responsibility to get/keep SPIDER on the right track and so on, but it was always a group project, even though lately it hasn't looked like it. I am not the eternal god-given moderator or boss.

To give you a concrete idea of what you can do, unless you have a different idea, is that, if you want, you choose one book and write about it, story by story, over the course of, say, a year. Presumably some of you *are* reading Harlan's books, and it's only the commenting part that's a leap.

The discussion thread is open.

----

Rick: Do you not receive my e-mails or do I not receive your responses? After a year or two it's starting to bug me, you know.

----

Found earlier:
Lou Anders (writer editor) likes DV:
"I’d say this was about as “dangerous” a collection as you could possibly hand a teenager growing up in a fundamentalist church-school in the Deep South. That might be the best anthology ever in my book, and I hope they reprint it like they have the previous volumes. At any rate, those stories expanded my brain right when it needed expanding, and for that, I’ll always love the short form and think of science fiction as short form fiction first and foremost..."
http://fantasybookcritic.blogspot.com/2009/05/interview-with-lou-anders.html

Castro prefers The Essential Ellison:
http://harpercollins.ca/authors/33210/AdamTroy_Castro/index.aspx

Lots of mentions of Harlan turning down that Cleveland prize wherever one looks. Reactions not too positive.

Earthquake
Not much to report on this end. In my area (Hancock Park, by Koreatown), we had a bunch of dogs barking. Oh, that and someone's car alarm was going off, but since the noise came from a vehicle being driven away, I'm guessing that someone either stole it or doesn't know how to work their own system. My building shook once, noticeably, and I heard something crack, and that was about it.

I'm a few hours away from my job interview for "Housekeeper/Room Attendant" at a hotel along Sunset Boulevard. Yay. Stained sheets and smelly towels. I'm so thrilled.

I've seen THE FALL. Wonderful movie. Visually powerful but much more than eye candy. A moving story as well.

I would highly recommend it to everyone!

Okay, I'm an East Coaster who knows little of Southern California perils, and next to nothing of Southern California geography. I'll grant you that up front. Still, I have to ask, with concern...

...are all you L.A.-area folks okay after last night's earthquake?

Tarsem Singh
I haven't seen "The Fall", but there is a review of it here:
http://minnesota.publicradio.org/display/web/2008/05/30/tarsem/

Do you fall after you "lose your religion"? Hahahahaha...

See, Singh directed R.E.M.'s video, "Losing My Religion" and then he directed this movie in 2006...

Well, the voices in my head thought it was funny.

Brian. No, Bill...iam. John? Phillips

From my mother's basement:
Dorman,

Is that the one with William Shatner in it?

(I had to ask, I'm quite weak.)

Cinema Lovers -- the Fall?
ATTN. CINEMA LOVERS: Have any of you folks seen "The Fall," directed by Tarsem Singh? If so, just wondering what you thought of it (the film got great comments on Amazon, and after seeing a trailer, I've decided to hunt down a copy).

Cheers,
DTS

Hey, Harlan...

I emailed my new address to Rick with the hope he could pass it to you. If need be I can post it.

The Keystone address is defunct, so a question to Susan. Do you ship HERC newsletters internationally? And if so, what's the yearly rate? I resigned to thinking that I'd have to live without while overseas, hence the non-renewal.

--
Ryan

Oops!
Harlan,

I went to the Post Office yesterday afternoon on some other business. As I hadn't heard form you about whether you wanted last Saturday's PLAIN DEALER, I decided to err on the side of caution and dropped my copy into the mail. It was sometime after that, before I went on line and saw your note saying you didn't need it.

Looks like I didn't err on the side of caution, I simply erred.

There's a brief letter from me accompanying the paper with an update about me you might want to snag, but other than that, you can throw the package into the recycle bin.

Bob

HEY, RYAN LEASHER !!!!!!!

Susan advises you hadn't renewed at HERC; and with your advisement of the current residence in New Zealand, we're fairly certain the old Keystone address in Burbank is invalid.

Need to know where, c/o whom, et al. DVD ready to go...in yr. court now, Sparky.

Yr. Pal, Harlan

P.S.

KIM: The gift of the Huck Finn is imperially gracious. But I must firmly demur. You have my bubbling thankyous, a 2-minute egg of deliciousness; but I have to refuse the gift. Thank you the more!

Respectfully, but firmly, Yr. Pal, Harlan

A YOWL OUT TO KOS

Your advisement of this week's nearness of venue: Grand!

Just give me a call where you'll be, at approximately what time, on which day -- for a change, the office schedule is open all week -- and I'll despatch my stalwart assistant to bring the box to you wherever you are in greater L.A. Minimal discombobulation for the bunch of us.

And thanks again!

Yr. Pal, Harlan

Smile Like You Mean It
Gumbo File, pronounced Fee-lay, is made from dried and ground sassafras leaves.

To me it has a taste somewhat like cumin, though subtler and darker, It has a tendency to thicken up when cooked, and since I like my chili thick, that works for me.

Somewhere years ago I read a recipe for something, probably gumbo, which I live (I have this love affair with Louisiana cooking) that called for it, and the result of my cooking with it wa such that I fell in love with the flavor it added. It seemed to fit with the style of chili I was already making (which is garbage can chili, as in "what've we got in the fridge? Hmmm, I could put this in the chili!"), so I tried it therein, and that worked.

It's a traditional Cajun/Creole spice. I buy it at regular supermarkets, spice section.

I will be in the LA area this week for a meeting, I could come by to pick up the books/meet you somewhere to pick up the books. That would be easiest for me. While Semi has kindly offered offered to haul, I live way out in the boondocks, and it's not easy to find either. Long story, no short version.

Huck? How's'about you allow us to give you the book, and maybe someday you find some sweet tschotke you would like to gift us with, or you buy us lunch some day at some sweet place you love, or similar whatever? As in, as and when, no worries, you're welcome?

Susan says that works for her.

J. P, Morgan had an enormous nose. He also hated Jay Gould.

I live for history like that.

KOS

Debating politics isn't your forte either. Wink.

-------------

Obama is killin em in South Bend.

I'd like to second Jan's endorsement of the SPIDER forums. I don't contribute much because, frankly, literary criticism isn't my forte -- but I read them constantly and think it's an ideal use of the Forums.

(And I may go ahead and start a MindFields thread at Jan's suggestion. Visual works and very short stories I can handle.)
________________________________

Saw TREK last might. IMAX. Not to bore our patron, but great fun. Loved it.
________________________________

ELLISON: I sent off yer Bok thingy yestiddy. You owes me a dollah.

Discussion of Harlan's works
As some of you know, Webderland has a forum for discussion of Harlan's works in the forum area.
It is called S.P.I.D.E.R. - Symposium Performing Incompetent Discussion of Ellison Releases.
I think it would be a good thing if, over the years, every story and book of Harlan's had some words written about them there, with some works hopefully getting read and commented on by two or more people.
Lately it's been mostly me, and I can't do it alone in my lifetime.
Specifically, there are several books that I have purposely avoided, and maybe we can find some people who'd like to take the lead on untouched sources such as:
Over the Edge, Mind Fields, Dream Corridor 1, Spider Kiss (chapter by chapter), Memos From Purgatory, Web of the City, No Doors, No Windows, I, Robot, Hornbook, and others.
It is also possible to devote threads to the stories of writers connected to Harlan. Possible examples are Farmer, Bradbury, Poe, or Leiber.
Also the threads already there are open for everybody to expand. We always welcome people to express their views on stories already evaluated.
SPIDER is a very long-term project that also grows and changes, and there is no set way to write entries, so whoever does is relatively free to do it his or her own way, as long as the book or story is at the center.
I'm opening a thread to discuss these matters further - suggestions appreciated.
I've also asked Rick some time ago to make SPIDER more visible and rename it something like Literary Forum so that people find it and know what it is.
---
buy.com has Dreams with Sharp Teeth for $18.09 including shipping. I think I saw it for less a few days ago but can't find it.

-OR-

You can lead a horse to water, but if you can get him to roll over and bark, you've really got something.


Chuck

Thanks very much for that early Dillon credit (?maybe from 11/59 Rogue -- but that's an internet citation, too).
I'd be happy to learn of other Dillon magazine credits worth following up and anyone who sees this and cares to help out is welcome to advise me of more via email. Regrettably, few of the magazine credits I have (or think I have - 43 from Galaxy but only 3 from the Saturday Evening Post - and so on) are things I've seen and noted myself, so corrections of variously-published information would also be welcome.
While the internet does frequently earn a potch for bad info and other misbehavior, Dillon fans might want to give it a kiss for the making available of a double-page beauty 'Great Kings of Africa #2' (Askia the Great) a Budweiser ad within the Google-Book-Search-digitized contents of an old Ebony magazine (May 1976 pp78-79). Richard

Harlan, we're fine. You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink.

KOS and Harlan
I will confess that I have no brain right now, having just recently pulled out my earplugs and regained consciousness. Is KOS in California? Because I have a truck. Because, except for a job interview on Monday to try and get a position as a housekeeper (insert shiver here, as I relive flashbacks of jobs past, with condoms stuck to bathtubs, stained sheets and the like), I can and will drive said books anywhere you wish. Because I have no life. And I owes ya, HE.

ASSORTED REPLIES AS PROMISED

ALAN COIL:

Your good thoughts re Reversatrol are kindly noted. But as Dr. John has said, this really isn't a place to be handing out ANY medical advice. I'm not snapping at you, merely sying that IIIIII feel uncomfortable with such comment, however innocent and correct, appearing here. A gentle nudge in the ribs, okay, Alan? (Or...as many have done...and I wish many HAD done with all that Star Trek mishigoss...you can alwys start your own thread for such nervous-making topics.) We okay?
----------------------------------------------------------------
ROB:

Don't know if I ever said this, here at the Pavillion, but your comments re PAUL MUNI hit me right where my heart resides. Paul Muni was, is, and likely always be, my ALL-TIME FAVORITE MALE ACTOR. I encountered him first when I was perhaps six years old...Lake Theater, Painesville, Ohio...1942...I was 8 years old...COMMANDOS STRIKE AT DAWN. I was gaspless in Gaza at his presentation, his power, the character that lay in his face. In those days, we had no equivalent of tv, DVD, anything; the occasional "re-release"; and so it was more than a decade before I got to see him in re-releases of ZOLA, CHAIN-GANG, SCARFACE, PASTEUR and the rest of thesmall canon in which he starred, up to and ending with his last film, the Gerald Green bestseller, THE LAST ANGRY MAN. Muni Weisenfreunde comes on the screen, and my heart skips a beat. Thus are we linked, Rob.
----------------------------------------------------------------
ROBERT LIDGREN:

Save for a few years as a child and later as a novice, I have never used ANY other typewriter than Olympias. Manuals, no electrics. Portables and office machines. You can see me sitting and working at an Olympia, repeatedly, in DREAMS WITH SHARP TEETH, DVD available 26 May. I'm fine for ribbons: I have a guy in Long Island City. I get 2 dozen on a regular basis, wrap 'em in foil, put 'em in the refrigerator freezer till I need a new one. I also have an Olympia repair guy. His name is Jesus. Honest.
----------------------------------------------------------------
BOB INGERSOLL, TONY ISABELLA, ALEX KRISLOW:

Got all the PDs I need. My neice, Lisa, in Cleveland, sent me five complete editions. Thanks, though.
----------------------------------------------------------------
A-TC:

"The Cleveland Thing" -- oh mah lawd!

I will bear yr child. And guess to whom I'll be anonymously sending a copy of that scenario?!!?
----------------------------------------------------------------
FINDERDOUG:

I will be expecting a copy of each of those stories when published.
----------------------------------------------------------------DUANE IN SANTA BARBARA:

Your remarks about hiking in S.B., and the fires, was eminently inspired and heartfelt. I say amen to that.
----------------------------------------------------------------
ALAN IN LARGO: Thanks.
----------------------------------------------------------------
ALISHA AUTUMN BROWN: Upon poring over the packets and envelopes containing extra bookplates from the many signed editions I've done, I find none for those three books. But I am waiting for the envelops to reach the HERC drop, and I'll figure something out to mollify your needs.
----------------------------------------------------------------
DIANE BARTELS: I'm pretty much turning down all lunch, dinner offers these days. At the end of the day, if having been able to get some work out, I "hit the wall," and don't really want to get shaved, showered, dressed, to go somewhere. But you can give us a ring come June, and we shall say...but it's unlikely, dear heart.
----------------------------------------------------------------
MICHAEL RAPOPORT: You said, "Just say the word." Consider the word said.
----------------------------------------------------------------
KEITH CRAMER: Geeeeeezus, kid! Go softly with that book! The tightness of fit indicates that these few death-cell editions were built by hand, and the miniscule tolerance is your marrow guarantee that it's never been lifted out after it was signed.
----------------------------------------------------------------
JOHN LANDSBERG, MD: My wife says I have drawn you to the dark side by introducing you to this site.
----------------------------------------------------------------
WILLIAM SHERMAN: Uh...send it. And gracias.
----------------------------------------------------------------

And now, gentlekin, I go in peace & quiet.

Yr. Pal, Harlan

Harlan, why aren't you singing? I heard you had some pipes.

REPLY TO RICHARD COHEN

The first piece Leo & Diane did "for" me was not, in fact, anything I had written. 1959. I was co-editing ROGUE Magazine with Frank M. Robinson, and I knew the Dillons' work from some wonderful b&w illustrations they'd done for Galaxy. I hired them to do a splendid portrait of Billie Holiday for a smart piece written for me by long-time friend Nat Hentoff. We went from there. These lunkheaded "sources" you cite pursuant to our half-century-plus friendship, and working closely, are merest piffle. You'd think, by now, Mr. Cohen, that anyone seeking accuracy in ANY venue, would eschew the use of the amateurish, incomplete or just wholly bullshit internet "sources."

Harlan Ellison

REPLY TO KOS

1. Your Susan's sweet offer of the Huck Finn for $50 is grand. And prior to last Sunday, around Friday the 8th, when we got hit with a sidewinder I didn't see spiralling in over the horizon, it would've been a lock. But, it's been a very sour week. So, with some embarrassment, I must back out of the deal. Times continue parlous. I'm extremely apologetic, but Reality keeps intruding in my usually J. Pierpont Morgan world-view. I beg your understanding. Which brings me to

2. I have a substantial load of new books. I want to get them to you. As previously, the postal freighting (having gone up yet again) makes the transferral from me to you, well, parlous. Having seen you and Gary at the New Bev, I realized it might be possible, if your schedule and matrix coincide with our location, to make a simple hand-over possible. Can we noodle this around a bit, and see if we can juxtapose a liaison?

3. Gumbo File. Where do I go to get a bit more data. And have you ever tried Dev'l Drops?

Harlan

REPLY TO RYAN LEASHER

Absolutely, we're still copacetic. Get me the address to which you want the DVD sent, and out it goes today, tomorrow, Monday.

Harlan

DVDs
Two good films finally out on DVD:

Fritz Lang's MAN HUNT -- big game hunter Walter Pidgeon decides he's gonna take out Hitler.

THE FRIENDS OF EDDIE COYLE -- Robert Mitchum at his most sublime, with great support from Peter Boyle, directed by Peter Yates and written by Paul Monash.

***********************************************

and the 'sanity clause' joke was a great way to start the weekend. Thanks!

Stories My Grand father Told Me
My grandfather was from Virginia, and as a young attorney fresh out of law school he had some very hard times in the depression of the nineteen thirties. At one point he was down to one dime, had no food, and was so depressed over his prospects that he actually said out loud he would sell his soul for just one client in need of a lawyer.

Well, as luck would have it, the Devil just appeared. Now I know that seems unbelievable, but my grand-daddy told me this story, and I know he was a truth telling man, so just believe it.

Well, the Devil up and told my grand-daddy, with a silky smooth manner and soft smile:

“Sir, if you will but sign this contract all nice and legal like, I guarandamntee you that by this time tomorrow you will have ten of the richest clients in the Great Commonwealth of Virginia than you could ever have hoped for, that your belly will be full of the best meal you have ever et’, and you will have met the prettiest woman in thirteen counties, and said woman will love you for all of her natural life and bear you six strong sons to carry on your name through the ages.”

And he held out a red fountain pen to my grand-daddy.

“Why. I’ll even throw in a long life and painless passing, since I declare I have taken a liking to you, Young Man!” and he winked at my grand daddy.

Well, even though depressed and desperate, my grand-daddy was no fool, not to mention a passing good lawyer. He looked over that there contract, and it sure enough did promise every one of those things, right there in black and white. It was all there, payable in return for his immortal soul.

Grand-daddy had done told me this tale innumerable times over the years. of how he didn’t even think twice about it. He was so depressed, so out of his right mind, that he just signed that infernal document. No sooner did his name go down in the red ink of the fountain pen, than pen, paper, and Lucifer all disappeared in a puff of sulphurous smoke.

Grand-daddy said he shook hisself, and thought perhaps he had dreamt the whole affair, but sure enough, the next day all the predicted good fortune came to pass.

The funny thing was, grand-daddy never seemed worried about the evil day coming when the Infernal Contract would come to collection.

I never asked him too much about it, when he would tell the story, but finally, when he was ninety-eight, I sat down with grand-daddy one day and asked him if he wasn’t perhaps just a mite perturbed, seeing as how even with long life guarandamnteed, at ninety-eight he had to be getting close to “pay up” time.

Well, my grand-daddy just smiled. “Funny you should mention that, Grand-Son, as the poor old cobber did indeed appear to me recently one night, and tried to collect his unjust reward!”

I goggled and stammered, “B-but you’re still here? H-how can that be?!”

My grand-daddy laughed. then winked at me.

“Seems The Devil didn’t know the law quite as well as I did. See, in Virginia, where that contract was signed, the state legislature not too long after the War Between The States had been concerned about young men selling their family farms, when they was desperate for money, for a pittance to Yankee carpetbaggers. So the legislators put in a law that said no man could be held to a contract he signed if’n he was able to show he was not in his right mind when he signed!”


“So’s when Beelzebub came t’other night to collect, I simply pulled down the State of Virginia Statutes from my shelf yonder, and opened it to the page, as well thumbed as it was by me, where ‘twas printed that very section of the Virginia legal code."

I told His Royal Infernitude, “Sir, you know as well as I that on that day in 1934 when you coaxed me into signing your damned contract, that I was destitute, starving, depressed and most definitely NOT in mine own right mind, and thus I put it to you, Sir, that therefore, by that law of the Great Commonwealth of Virginia, you cannot hold me to that contract.”

Grand-daddy leaned back in his rocking chair and laughed.

“Well, yes-sir-ee Bob, Old Nick looked at me, and then he looked at that book of statutes, and then he slapped his hand up t’ his forehead, and squealed like a sinner at a Camp Meetin'!

“Hot damn! How could I have gone and forgotten? Yes, Virginia, there IS a Sanity Clause!”

Grand-daddy swore Lucifer then gave him a wink, and, with a wry smile, disappeaed with a puff of sweet smelling smoke.

“And I don’t think he’ll be a coming back!”

Grand Daddy lived to a hunnerd and ten, and died with a smile on his lips.

KOS

Huh.

After intricate and detailed analysis...

(Okay, I opened to the contents page)

I found that the current Ellison/Landsberg medical history goes back a bit.

To whit: UNEARTH Number 7/Summer 1978 table of contents:

"HARLAN ELLISON HAS RECENTLY EMERGED VICTORIOUS FROM LONG BOUTS WITH A MOVIE SCRIPT AND WITH PNEUMONIA. WE HAVE HIGH HOPES HIS WRITING COLUMN WILL RESURFACE IN THE NEXT ISSUE."

(Okay, the "all caps" thing is mine, but still...)

See, even waaayyy back then Dr. Dire was stuck with diagnosing our beloved patron's medical condition and writing about it in public.
_________________________________________

Nothing else. In one week Cris and I head north to the Bellevue Jazz Fest, Mount St. Helens and a day chasing Orca around Puget Sound on a high-speed inflatable.

(Music, volcanic explosions and getting your ass chewed off. Kinda like a day at the office.)

Block in town

As previously mentioned, I am in full agreement with Mr. King when it comes John D. MacDonald, Donald Westlake and Lawrence Block. We are down to one now and he doesn't make it around here that often but this Tuesday he'll be at the Mystery Bookstore near UCLA along with George Pelecanos.

Make sure to pick up a copy of Enough Rope and a couple of Scudders if you don't have the complete set.

"Goombahs," Ellison? Surely not.

Have you ever heard of gin trash? I've been thinking of mailing you a crate of the stuff as thanks for the special "I'm gone spend my Christmas money on a half a Rabbit Hole subscription for this bozo" gift from the lovely Miss Susan and your own goofy self. I bet you didn't even put that card up on your icebox. Crushed my poor, orphaned sister's heart, you did. That's it, we're gone throw down now, tio. Assume the position. Fisticuffs at dawn, New Amsterdam Rules. Or would you rather 'rassle, in the old NWA/WCW/Jerry Lawler confabulation on which we was weaned. I warn you, you cantankerous bastard, I can lock on a mean Figure-Four. But seriously, how about that gin trash? It's a mighty fine fertilizer/garden foundation, and I got an acre out back knee deep with the light and black. Hell, I might have already mailed you some five pound bags, I can't remember, me having been soaked recently in our other favorite kind of gin.

Whatever will be will be. If you get a package postmarked from the 'Sipp', don't snort the powder that's in it. Bury it in the ground out back and plant some tomatoes. Also, don't worry about Obama; if he persists on the timid we can vote him out next go round. We'll get us a new Bobby Kennedy and give Barry the Johnson. Bam.

Your monotanous cousine,
Zack "Who the Hell is that Guy?" Malatesta

Arrrr
Typing this at the neighborhood library, my destination for daily early-afternoon walk, where I am awaiting the end of torrential rainfall so I can, er, walk back. Never mind me.

The book discussion of ESSENTIAL ELLISON 50th is tomorrow, btw.

With the oceans of money and corporate lobbies submersing Washington, it is definitely a "Faust" environment.

I email the Obama administration regularly to voice my concerns. I urge everyone to do so, assuming a bunch here aren't already way ahead of me on this.

This is the link: http://www.whitehouse.gov/CONTACT/

One of the most obvious symptoms of contempt for the criminal justice system is individuals who commit crimes openly flouting it and continuing to commit more crimes. Whitewash 'em, and they sure ain't gonna change their ways. (But Obama works in long-run strategies, and for now - even when his pacifiying rhetoric about these matters can irritate me - I stand back for now to watch) What angers me is how pacified the public had become for decades, regardless of the warnings voiced, allowing white collar and corporate barricudas to unabashedly rot the whole system.

This is why I'm a Democratic Socialist.

Anyway, no time in history has offered the opportunity like we have now to voice our concerns directly to the President. HIT them relentlessy with the MESSAGE! On EVERY front!

As Mike Farrell recently said in an interview, Obama, like FDR, will DO it, but he has to be pushed.

A correction from the PHILA. DAILY NEWS
Despite what they printed last week, they now say that the Franklin Institute's "Star Trek: The Exhibition" will NOT feature the Guardian of Forever.

To Shalanna:

Would love to have you as a member of the HERC family. Details are as follows:

$15.00 for 6 issues of the "Rabbit Hole" newsletter. Checks made payable to: THE HARLAN ELLISON RECORDING COLLECTION, Post Office Box 55548, Sherman Oaks, CA 91413.

Thanks - Susan

A Call to Arms
Attention Flying Blue Monkey Anti-Corruption Taskforce,

There is a book blockade in progress.

Bureau of Customs in the Philippines has begun to tax imported books of all types. Several people including University of Iowa Creative Writing Professor Robin Hemly (Guggenheim Fellowship in the Philippines), Neil Gaiman and McSweeny's magazine are getting the word out.

Customs Undersecretary Espele Sales explained the government's position to a group of frustrated booksellers and importers in an Orwellian PowerPoint presentation, at which she reinterpreted the Florence Agreement as well as Philippine law RA 8047.

The fuller story here:

http://www.mcsweeneys.net/links/manila/1dispatch6.html
http://asia.cnet.com/blogs/babelmachine/post.htm?id=63010822

There are several petitions and methods of spreading the word available.

Contact UNESCO
http://www.unesco.org/webworld/portal/processing/forms/contact/en/form.php

Fighting for words,

Andrew F.

As Promised ......
Dear Mr. Ellison et al.:

My bet for the Preakness:

Fifty across on "General Quarters".

(Sturgeon General's warning: For mind bets, fun, and amusement purposes only. Equine prognostication still susceptible to Sturgeon's Law.)

To Michael, I believe: Thanks for the clarification and update on "The Semi-writer Affair". Will try to reach directly with promised funds, as been killing the tracks the last two weeks.

Mr. Ellison, sir: Yep, my father, in his younger days, worked both as a "grease jockey", as he calls it, and a "printer's devil" around Lynn, MA, among other jobs, before he met my dear mother. Made him give up both for something more permanent. He remembers both fondly, as I recall, and still puts out a mean bacon and egg breakfast, with grilled potatoes on the side.

Regards from the rail,

William Sherman
Boxford, MA

"TOO strong" Kee-rist. And whatever else.

My brief time with dingbats - and avoiding printer's pie.
***Harlan*** You are very kind. The six weeks or so laying out a few column inches here and there and negotiating with widows or orphans - and the insanely tedious and messy cleanup tasks, along with one field trip to the bowels of the Milwaukee Journal where I spent some time talking to the two guys who worked on the MJ "green sheet" were just enough of an apprenticeship (to strong a word) to know what a hellish and miserable job that would always be.

You REALLY should write a few hundred (or thousand) words about those on-the-road experiences if you get the chance.

I would LOVE to be the person to inform and elucidate everyone here about which Brown novel(s) and stories you're referring to but I've only read about half of his work and while I split the reading about 50/50 between the mystery and the SF I've either missed it or forgotten it. I'm sorry. However, people should read ALL the Brown until they find it - and then keep reading it. Anything you don't like send on to me. I'm still missing quite a few of the mystery titles.

The Twain title that spends the most time per page on the printer's trade is THE MYSTERIOUS STRANGER, notably the third version, "No. 44, the Mysterious Stranger: Being an Ancient Tale Found in a Jug and Freely Translated from the Jug" where Satan spends some time fucking with the inhabitants of a print shop. Typesetting was Twain's very first paid job and this meditation on the trade was one of the last things he was working on in 1909/1910. Much mental hay is made with the phrase "printer's devil" and it contains some of Twain's most disturbing imagery. It's broken and incomplete but what there is has tremendous power and scope. While I have come to side with Harlan about the final disposition of incomplete works, this is that rare exception where I am glad the versions and fragments were saved. More than glad.

- Barney

ps. - those are some UGLY sentences up there. I slammed this one out in less time than usual as I am out the door. Apologies.

p.p.s. - Harlan - the typesetting thing explains a lot.

Folks, you should see the way this guy marks up a page some day. If I thought about that level of scrutiny when I typed this blather I'd would never *ever* find the strength to begin.

Recent Ellison mentions
Harlan's copyright battles gets commented upon:

http://nancynall.com/2009/05/12/onward-don-quixote/

Unfortunately, a couple of schmucks bring up the Willis incident on the comments board.

And Harlan gets briefly mentioned on the Film Score Monthly board, on the "Brace Yourselves for STAR TREK' thread on the General Discussion area. Be prepared for a long slog, though.

http://www.filmscoremonthly.com/board/posts.cfm?threadID=58924&forumID=1&archive=0

Torture
Jon Stewart hit it out of the park last night, commenting on Obama's refusal to release the torture photos (or even try to investigate why we ditched the rule of law), and the dismissal of Arabic translator Dan Choi over his homosexuality:

"So it was okay to waterboard a guy over eighty times, but God Forbid that the guy who could _understand_ what that prick was saying has a _boyfriend_... Waterboarding may make the prisoner talk, but it ain't gonna make him talk English."

I'm worried for Obama. Cut off from the human race in that great big White House, with men who know how to use words whispering into his ear, "Mr. President, there are better options available", or "Mr. President, it really would be best if..."

One's perspective gets warped, and bit by bit, without even knowing it, you start to lose yourself. I already despise the fact I'm starting to believe Obama is vulnerable to the carefully calculated verbal poison of these men; if anything, I want him to keep proving me wrong.

Mr. Levy,

I share your concern and disgust over the policies of torture enacted during the Bush Administration. To follow up on your posting, here is an article written by Lawrence Wilkerson, former chief of Staff to Colin Powell, and he absolutely destroys the argument for torture:

http://www.thewashingtonnote.com/archives/2009/03/some_truths_abo/

I have had lengthy debates with some of my conservative friends over this topic and I still find it confounding. Why is there even a discussion on this point? Have we, as a nation, degenerated so completely that we would embrace the worst tactics used by the very people we are opposing?

My friend Steve Barber made some excellent points about the Obama administration's decision to not reveal the additional photos documenting the torture at Abu Gharib and other facilities. I have conflicting opinions on whether or not the photos should be released, but I am growing increasingly concerned about the Obama Administration's continuation of some of the most blatant abuses of the former administration. Just today it was revealed that Obama would continue the practice of military tribunals for Gitmo detainees that had been previously suspended.

My fear is that Obama, in his quest for bipartisan appeal, is looking to find areas where he can appeal to independents and moderate Republicans. While I understand that urge, sanctioning some of these subversions of the Constitution is just plain wrong

Mark

No time to be cute or coy

Sorry, dumb affectation of a history prof. John Brown's last words were: "I, John Brown, am now quite certain that the crimes of this guilty land can never be purged away but with blood."

If the stuff in the government's possession (minus the 90+ hours of CIA tapes they destroyed in a deliberate act of erasing our collective memory and obstructing justice) is what Seymour Hersh and others allege, well, as our host has said, payback can be a motherfucker.

For those who can't help themsleves...

and feel compelled to witness the evidence from court papers and other related documents dealing with toruture and evidence thereof, I politely suggest you check out the brilliant series by Glenn Greenwald at salon.com, although one of the writers who appears in the Washington Post (Fromkin, perhaps) is also all over this story like white on rice.

It is simply the most appalling tale of my 44 year lifespan, as I was too young for My Lai. If what has been alleged is true, John Brown's famour note he passed to his executioner may have to play itself out once again.

Earliest Dillon Ellison illo ?
I've been ransacking the internet for data on Leo & Diane Dillon (also, deploring the lack of an active devoted Dillon website and capturing tiny pictures of horribly rare book covers) and began to wonder whether the Dillons illustrated anything Ellison prior to the '61 Memos From Purgatory cover. Rodrigo Torres' old but valuable bibliography (you can still conjure it up through 'the wayback machine' -- but whatever became of Rodrigo?) lists the July 1962 Knight magazine story "Blind Bird Go Away" as the earliest Ellison magazine Dillon illo, but the Locus interview ("They met Harlan Ellison in 1959, after doing illustrations for Rogue...") suggests the possibility there might have been earlier Dillon pictures for HE's own Rogue pieces. I'd appreciate it if anyone here -- Harlan himself, perhaps -- can say more about that. Many Thanks. Richard Cohen

Oh, Printer, My Printer!

Oh, what fun it is to dip one's hand, perforated with paper cuts, into a can of 'gas' to wipe down those giant ink rollers. It's also quite a memory to have ink permanently soaked into one's skin. After twelve hour shifts, there was no time to adequately scrub before swimming in the ink once again.

On the subject of movies based upon the work of Philip K. Dick, the Totaldickhead blog is now reporting that Flow My Tears, The Policeman Said will be the next one adapted for the screen, following the upcoming Radio Free Albemuth. Isa will be co-producing, and and Laura will be an executive producer on the film.

http://totaldickhead.blogspot.com/2009/05/flow-my-tears-policeman-said-to-be-next.html

Regarding the topic of a film which was just released and will go nameless here, I relate the following information as a public service: anyone intending to buy the new deluxe DVD of Galaxy Quest as an alternative should know that it's Paramount releasing that one too (didn't discover this fact till mere seconds after my debit card was scanned for the purchase of it). The trailer for the unmentionable film even shows up before the menu, for Valis' sake.

Hi, Harlan...

We still good for the DVD copy of _Dreams With Sharp Teeth_ as part of the "Seven Against Chaos" manuscript trade?

I'm in NZ now instead of Burbank, but I can arrange to have it sent to a friend so it's still just US postage.

--
Ryan

Jerry Pournelle was kind enough to sent me this regarding who wrote the first (published) novel on a word processor:

To the best of my knowledge it was me, in about 1978. Robert Forward was probably second, using the big system at Hughes
laboratories where he worked and the TECO editor. I used Electric Pencil on an S-100 system.

Jerry Pournelle
Chaos Manor

End quote. KOS seems to have found the same information yesterday after I wrote Jerry. It's already official then.

THE DVD INFO. et al
If you go to Amazon.com the DVD is listed as: Harlan Ellison: Dreams with Sharp Teeth (2007). Pre-orders are being taken now and it says they will be shipping it out starting May 27th, 2009. The price listed just a few minutes ago was $19.99. There are two knock-out reviews currently listed by people who saw it in theatres (one when Harlan was on the scene). No better "investment" rears her head this week (a hellish one for families employed by General Motors).

I just watched The Reader with Kate Winslet and Ralph Fiennes. Mighty good story-telling and Kate gets better all the time! In my humble opinion it is a must see for anyone keen on observing a well-crafted transformation of a powerful story to the screen by a cast and crew with obvious passion, dedication and a commitment to getting it right. Lena Olin as a death camp survivor works marvels and the young German actor David Kross (young Michael Berg) deserves genuine recognition. The movie is based on the book by Bernard Schlink ("Der Vorleser") with the screenplay by David Hare.

Now, I know that Ricky Gervais advised Kate Winslet to do a Holocaust movie in the British TV series "Extras" if she wanted to win an Oscar but PLEASE don't connect the two truths. The juxtaposition between art and life (here) is, I ASSURE YOU, merely a coincidence!! It was only because that small impish devil on my shoulder wispered something to me that I bring this up at all!

The Reader is a real treat.

Cheers,

-Rob Lidgren
Calgary

movie marathon
For any bored late-night-dwellers or insomniacs, tune into TCM tonight/tomorrow morning for: JOURNEY INTO FEAR (allegedly co-directed by Orson Welles), Hitchcock's SHADOW OF A DOUBT (his favorite), the fun WALK SOFTLY, STRANGER with Joseph Cotten and Alida Valli, the brilliant THE THIRD MAN and the fascinating British drama THUNDER ROCK.
Me, I'll Tivo 'em. But there's something wonderful about watching 'em live on the tube.

ELLISON TO DANNELKE

BARN:

In all the years I've known you, I never knew you, too, were a "devil." I set from case, I set full stick and frag, I was a
"slag bucket monkey," I operated everything from drop-frame to Graph-o-type machines to six- and eight-color litho behemoths.

There were always two good jobs available on the open road...ALWAYS...short order fry-cook and printer's devil. Any Webderlander who has no idea what we're talking about, should look into Fredric Brown's mystery novels. You know which ones, Ole Chum.

Yr. Pal, Harlan

Clipping Service, can this be true? I sense a dynamite story here! We'll mount it as a Broadway musical, and be rich beyond our wildest imaginings, when "SPRINGSTEEN FOR HITLER!" opens! You start the financing, I'll call Franz Liebkin (if he's not too busy with his boids...)!

Mustered and at the ready
Good to hear from you again after the long absence. See where things go conversation-wise without you cracking the whip? Oh, and we DO so like the whip... wait, that... sounds wrong somehow...

A big thank you to those that helped me out insurance and registration wise-with the state, and an EXTRA big thanks to the one whose gift arrived by post on the very day that my roommate came a-callin' for the rent. At least I was able to give her something, and for that, sir, I thank you. The AdSense nonsense is over with, by the way, so disregard the post on the messageboard with that--dead end, baby. Still blogging, though: semiwriter.blogspot.com.

Your local weather report: a sunny day here in downtown L.A., slight breeze, bright blue skies and endless traffic. Light on the helicopter activity today, too. That's always welcome. I keep thinking back to 1983's "Blue Thunder" with Roy Scheider whenever they're circling.

Your local Eddie Ifft report, via Facebook: "Is it wrong that when I sit in first class I wear my Burger King Crown and yell at anyone from coach that even brushes up against me?"

HARLAN SPEAKS !!!!!!!!!!!

Happily, nay JOYOUSLY, purposely, I have been away from you lot of chittering, chattering, clattering, calliopean clackhammers since a week ago. I have spent this day, today, responsibly sloughing through your posts -- avoiding all the Star Trek thickskullery of cosmically NOfuckingINTEREST to me -- in an effort to concentrate what small measure of bipolar gentleness I have accessible to me in a world inhabited by Carrie Prejean, Nancy Pelosi, Paris Hilton and one giant teardrop of heartsick disappointment at My Current Jesus, Mr. Obama, for his bewildering current position on the Torture Memos.

I left your loving embraces on the 8th, and I've been working forward. I have reached the mid-climb to Shangri-la (NOT having to come here for a day or so, even perhaps to having a free weekend for myself and my spouse), the 10th, as I interject this stop-gap post to let you know that soon -- perhaps even later today, gawd willin'n'the'crick'dont'rise -- I will be lading in a freightload of replies to Robert Lidgren, Tony Isabella, Bob Ingersoll, Adam-Troy Castro, Alex Krislov, FinderDoug, KOS on several fronts, Alan Coil, Duane up in Santa Barbara, Alan in Largo, Alisha Autumn Brown, Diane Bartels, Michael Rapoport, Keith Cramer ... and that's merely up through most of the 10th.

Exhaustion is my lot. Patience is yours. Alert those who need to know I'll be speaking to them, and otherwise just Muster the Goombahs.

Yr. Pal, Harlan

Jerry and Zeke
If you type into a search engine "Zeke Pournelle Smithsonian Computer" (Zeke was the name of Pournelles first computer, which is in the Smithsonian) you get, among others, a link to:

http://www.chaosmanorreviews.com/open_archives/jep_column-319-a.php

In the matter of "What was the first book written on a PC?", the pertinent section of the page is copied below:

"One reason old Zeke, my original computer, is on display in the Smithsonian is that to the best we can find out, I was the first person to write a book using a home computer. In those days writers mostly worked with typewriters. David Gerrold got a magnetic card driven IBM Selectric, and other writers got dedicated word processing systems not long after I began using Zeke to do my BYTE columns. Others joined in, and eventually typewriters vanished. There are a few authors who use typewriters just as there are a few who still write in longhand, but now most books are written on computers."

Pournelle tells the story in a bit more detail in the introduction to his 1997 novel Starswarm, available at:

http://www.jerrypournelle.com/slowchange/Starsintro.html

Of course, the key phrase above is "to the best we can find out".

KOS

No freakin' joke there! I caught a type of staph infection in two toes of my right foot three months ago and it took so many drugs to knock it down you'd think I was trying to single-handedly wipe out a pandemic.

And I am WELL AWARE that a bunch of folks on this board have had FAR worse to contend with. It was just the tenacity of this that impressed/scared the hell out of me.

Enough whining from me.

And a hearty welcome to Doc Dire. I too enjoyed the heck out of UNEarth back in the day having purchased most of them from the long defunct MOONSTONE bookstore down in Washington D.C.

- Barney

The Staph
Some mention should always, in matters of medicine, be made of those fierce new strains of Staph which appear to be popping up in ever greater numbers in the hospital environment. A possibility exists that overuse of some antibiotics may actually improve the environment for Staph.

For Chuck Messer Re: SECONDS
And what about the great Jeff Corey? That man even made SUPERMAN AND THE MOLE-MEN believable!

Apologies for the multiple typos.

One correction: "...they are more examples of the sort of horrors that occurred in Abu Graib then they should..."

I am an ardent defender of the First Amendment, and feel that the media has to be a responsible member of society holding the government accountable. The proverbial 4th Estate "watchdog" relationship with the three arms of the Federal Gov. In that aspect, in the last eight years they have failed Americans just as thoroughly as did the Federal Government itself.

But I do not feel it is necessary to release the photographs in question for the leering public to gawk at. If they are more examples of the horrors of Abu Graib than they should serve as evidence to prosecute anyone responsible -- no matter what level of government at which they worked.

But it's not necessary for us to see ALL of the abuse pictures any more than it is necessary for us to see every picture of the pulped remains fo a murder victim, or the scars of a beaten spouse, or of the atrocities committed by Hitler upon the Jews during that terrible part of history.

The President and others have said the additional pictures do not show anything above and beyond what we have seen, but may expand the scope and scale of the actions themselves. I accept that without the need to see the pictures.

I do not buy the argument that the public has a right to see the images "to set the record straight" or to "show how bad it really was". These things can be done without splashing the image of a cuffed and naked prisoner humiliatingly across the pages of the Daily News. Haven't these victims of the torture suffered enough, now we have to show their degradation to the world?

Keep the pictures for when they will do the most good -- as evidence in a trial of the most guilty -- and not for the publicly lurid pleasure of a media and audience drooling for scandal.

The demand for the pictures be shown publicly says far more things sociologically about us as a culture than do the contents of the pictures themselves. It isn't about openness -- the shots will be part of the public record in a trial -- it's about porn.
____________________________________________

ANDREW: I do appreciate the film version of CONSTANTINE more than most fans, which probably puts me in a minority here in the Pav. I was fortunate to see the film prior to reading the comics, so didn't have a pre-built perception of the character. While it was a CGI-driven film in many ways, it also avoided the CGI overwhelming the story -- which has tripped up so many other films based on graphic stories.
___________________________________________

"I touch my face--almost like a twitch. Sure, I wash my hands, but I also touch doorknobs, pens, things that I drop--why do I keep dropping things?"

Frank? Don't you work in catering?

"The masterpiece that killed George Orwell"
http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/2009/may/10/1984-george-orwell

Even Hitler
loves Springsteen:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xGJpu5AiYoE

Who knew?

Edward Bernays, the father of modern public relations said that people take you more seriously when you have a doctor before your name. Wink.

-----------

I take a CNN poll, this is CNN--not Fox, CNN! They ask if the government should release all the detainee abuse photos. Here, this is a no brainer. I expect a big majority on my side, but bam! Only twenty percent, so far, want the photos to be released, giving into the propaganda that releasing the photos will hurt the troops. Troops, what about justice?

The troops are occupiers, they should stop occupying Iraq and Afghanistan, that's how you tone down the violence.

My fear is that Obama is turning into Bush light.

----------------

Mark Twain was also a member of the anti-Imperialist league.

SECONDS.

One of the creepiest movies ever.

Rock Hudson's best performance. Ever.

I believe it was also John Randolph's first movie role after he'd been blacklisted.

And Will Geer. Oh, that "devil".


Chuck

Correction
That should be "altering," not "alternering." Damn!

To Steve Barber
You seem to have much more affection for the film CONSTANTINE than I do. However, maybe I'm just spewing sour grapes over the filmmakers alternering the nationality and age of the main character. Whether or not this is the case, I don't think that I will ever consider this a great or particularly intelligent film.

There will always be SF movies with brains and without brains. I think the situation is good - more can be done with less money. Independent movie producers can do a good-looking Philip K. Dick adaptation and so on. Or direct-to-DVD things like the Bixby film Steve mentioned. So they had "2001" in 1968 - but what else? Certainly the number of good SF movies isn't decreasing.

If they're not enough, there are books, as well as non-SF brainfodder and fun.

When I inquired about the first person to write a published book on a word processor, it was mainly to illustrate we'll never know any of those things. I think we can all confirm this now. But just for fun, I'll ask Pournelle via e-mail if he has an opinion.

Dreams With Sharp Teeth release
Dreams With Sharp Teeth

I checked up as best I could and....
the film will be shown on The Sundance Channel
Monday May 25th at 9 pm (your times may vary)
Thursday May 28
Sunday May 31
I had heard the DVD gets released May 26 (a Tuesday)
Netflix is supposed to have it available then
(DVD only not to watch onlne)
digitalbits DOT com is usually a good source of info that I check out
Hope this helps

Trademarks
As a follow on to the discussions here over who wrote the first works on a typewriter and the fact that this chat began with the mention of Mark Twain.
Today I came across a 1901 copy of 'Life on the Mississippi'. It has the authors real name and his nom de plume, which are bracketed together, printed on the copyright page with the words 'Trade' and 'Mark' bracketing the parentheses.
This is a long-winded way of posing the question - Who was the first author to trade mark his name? Any ideas?


Cheers, Iain.

"As for sf movies that have some brains behind them and some provocativeness on screen..."

Has anyone mentioned, yet, the fabulously null-budget/nevertheless effective THX 1138?

Still Dreaming of Dreams...
Jarod said: "Has dreams been released on DVD yet?? & if so is it available in Australia??"

I just checked the Aussie censor's website (http://www.classification.gov.au/) and it has not been classified yet.

It will probably go direct to DVD, unless Accent or Palace pick it up for a limited arthouse circuit release. It'd be a good title to schedule during a writer's festival. SBS might show it eventually on TV, as they did the Bukowski documentary.

-Rod-

Dreams With Sharp Teeth - DVD

This is a question for anyone out there:

Has dreams been released on DVD yet??

& if so is it available in Australia??

Many Thanks
Jarod Hitchcock

oh the HORROR of it all...
apocapee is when songs leave off the "g" on a word, such as _Goin' to California_ by Led Zeppelin.

It was a good panel, and Harlan didn't steal the show. Well, not all of it in any event.

Robin Williams
Robin is on Letterman tonight talking about his heart surgery.

Did someone say “Tobonga?”

How can you not like a monster made out of a tree? Yes, it does take the prize for the slowest monster of all time, right behind the mummy (the one with Karloff) and the blob, but what not to like? Just the puns alone are worth watching it.

1. “gee they really went out on a limb for this one”

2. “its good to see there getting to the root of the problem”

3. “if they need help why don’t they make a trunk call?”

I’m going to stop myself now and go to my video self, blow the dust off “It came from Hell” and watch it with a smile on my face.

Gary

Okay, I'll Bite ...
"And if you're a good boy, I'll let you ask me what apocapee is."

Is that supposed to be a double-e? One who swallows vowels ... ?

Humbly holds up bowl and asks...
Harlan,

Thank you for the precise (and my new preferred) term for the invasive parasitic wasp-like insertion into unsuspecting host words.

Approximately 1.53 years ago, when Mr. Neil Gaiman shared on his online journal that he had just learned that there is a name for this practice, I looked up "infix" and found several references like

in·fix (ĭn-fĭks')
tr.v. in·fixed, in·fix·ing, in·fix·es

1. To fix in the mind; instill.
2. Linguistics To insert (a morphological element) into the body of a word.

n. Linguistics (ĭn'fĭks')
An inflectional or derivational element appearing in the body of a word. For example, in Tagalog, the active verb sulat "write" can be converted to a passive, "written," by inserting the infix -in-, yielding sinulat.
The American Heritage Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition, 2009

and I could finally categorize such ephemeral movie dialogue gems as "La-dee-freakin'-da" and "absofuckinglutely", the more charming "Fan-smegging-tastic" from Red Dwarf, the utterly classic "guaran-damn-tee", and the seemingly self-aware "Don't inter-fucking-rupt!"

Infix and tmesis are cross-linked in Wikipedia, and the entry for tmesis says "Linguists sometimes describe tmesis as a form of infixation" -- though I'm sure such a generalization could have been entered into that landfill of an online resource by anyone as as careless and apprentice as myself.

So here I thought I knew what I was talking about, seeing your "apparently" as the mutant, the tumor, the remora.

I would welcome your recommendation of any linguistic reference books -- the kind that have weight, that I can hold in my hand and turn real pages. And humbly, with downward eyes and trembling dirty fingers lifting 16-ton empty bowl ask,

"Please, sir, what is an apocapee?"

Respectfully,

Andrew S. Fuller

More mea culpa
I KNOW I'm not supposed to be posting more than once a day! I don't have a solution, though. Egad.

HAND SANITIZERS: There is a serious issue about the possibility that we are killing too many good germs in general, but here's my current bottom line. WAY more good germs are killed by doctors being too lazy to educate their patients, and instead giving out metric tons of antibiotics that are not needed when the illness is in fact viral. And the hand sanitizers do kill the bad stuff, so it stops us from getting sick as often, which is good for many reasons, not the least of which is that it keeps us from going to lazy doctors unnecessarily and getting antibiotics we don't need! :)

THANK you to whomever corrected me on the title of the Damon Knight story. I hate being wrong, but I hate worse REMAINING wrong.

And, KOS, I'm blushing from your kudos about UNEARTH. So I will go ahead and toot my own horn just a little. It was my concept/creation. The magazine title and all the section and column concepts and titles were all mine. I even wrote a couple of the writing columns when Harlan was on hiatus. (Years later Harlan updated that material and I wrote a new piece and linking material to turn our writing pieces into a "how to write sf" chapter in a college textbook.) And best of all, we did discover a lot of great writers and boost a lot of careers, which was the whole idea. Jonathan Ostrowsky (then Ostrowsky-Lantz), my dear friend, masterfully and manfully handled the daily nuts and bolts of making it all happen and wouldn't allow me to let the idea fade out just because I happened to be going through medical school at the time; that's why I insisted his name go above mine.

Sorry, all. I'll shut up now. :)

Couple of things --

Susan,
Renewal's on the way, if you haven't got it already. Thanks again.


And as long as we're talkin' movies...
Check out Fictionwise.com for the ebook release of Harlan Ellison's Watching. Good stuff.


Bests to all,

--tr

germs

Carlin may have been onto something. There is some interesting thinking that we may be TOO clean and germ-free, leading to increased allergies and so on. I'd be interested in Dr. Landsberg's take on the hygiene hypothesis (http://www.nytimes.com/2009/01/27/health/27brod.html).

Regarding hand sanitizer, I think the main fear is that, much like the overuse of antibiotics, it may be breeding stronger germs.

MM (who always uses the paper towel he dried his hands with to open the bathroom door, which he then props open with his foot as he turns for the three point shot into the trashcan, at which he has become adept)

Boy, I must have a great immune system, because that's all I do, I touch my face--almost like a twitch. Sure, I wash my hands, but I also touch doorknobs, pens, things that I drop--why do I keep dropping things?

I did hear someone say that hand sanitizer is bad because it takes off all the good germs.

-----------

I tend to write postmodernist parody. Much of what you see here is not me, but me being cute. I am grabbing your short hairs and giving them an uncle like tug.

Every grain of sand has a mystery, this is why I always have sand in my bed.

Tabanga!
Never saw "It Came From Hell", but I have heard of the Dread "Tabanga" from Gary Lee, and thus will someday indulge in the guilty pleasure of this one.

I love bad SF movies when they are that funny.

Along those lines: while "Attack of the Crab Monsters" did me a case of the Willies when ten, mine own favorite of that mini-genre is "The Crawkling Eye" aka "The Trollenberg Terror". Forrest Tucker chasing down head-eating giant eyes with tentacles that live on a Swiss mountaintop in a gigantic fogbank.

GATTACA is one small SF film that seems to have worked.

I never understood the plot much, but Twelve Monkeys also seemed chockfull of nuts of Big Ideas and concepts.

Greg Benford for one has talked about the value of small, idea driven SF films, and wanted to write one, at one time.

Doc Landsberg is a little too loath to blow his horn as loud as it ought. His magazine published the first story of not only William Gibson, but also James P. Blaylock. Not to mention the first novel by Rudy Rucker.

He also had columns by such as Theodore Sturgeon and one Harlan Ellison.

The mag even held a writing contest with a unique prize. The "winner" got to "collaborate" with Harlan. From what Josh has written on that subject, the winner (was there one?) might still be recovering.

Doc is on the money about handwashing. I regularly get called "Howard Hughes" or "Mister OCD" when I go through my handwashing routine in the presence of others (I do the full elbow down surgical routine), or avoid handling washroom doors when leaving after a laving session.

I just shrug and enjoy watching the careless mooks sniffle their way through another season of misery with their rhinovirii infested associates.

The scariest story Harlan ever told, heard at a public appearance he gave, probably the 1978 Phoenix Worldcon.

He awakened in his bed at Webderland one night at "O' Dark Thirty", with that skin crawling preternatural certainty that someone stood next to him. Someone was; a woman who had been stalking him for some time, who had somehow found his home, gotten inside, and come straight to his bedside.

I don't recall what happened after that, other than that he got her out of there without anyone being massively harmed, if I recall correctly.

But ever since hearing that tale of terror I have been unable to sleep in a room unless the door is securely fastened with a dead bolt or similar device.

It creeped me out that badly.

It also cured me of any desire to ever be a famous and well-"loved" author.

Harlan is really too kind to us. After such an experience I would have obtained a legal name change and retreated to a mountaintop.

KOS

Various / Continued
Oh, and that Damon Knight story is "Not With a Bang," Doc.

*

Joke that fits the subject.

Ted takes his wife to a fancy restaurant. He is enjoying her company and the fine ambience and the music of the orchestra, when all of a sudden he accidentally knocks his spoon off the table. Before he can pick it up a waiter swoops in and hands him a fresh spoon from the pocket of his jacket.

Later, after a fine meal, he says to the waiter, "I must say that I was deeply, deeply impressed by the way you rushed in to replace my spoon. But how did you come to have a spoon in the pocket of your jacket?"

"Ahhh," the waiter says, "the owner of this place had our service appraised by an efficiency expert. He determined that ten percent of all customers drop a utensil at some point during the meal, and that ninety percent of the time it's a spoon. So we all carry around spoons in our jacket pockets so we can smoothly and efficiently replace them on demand."

"Isn't that wonderful," Ted says. "I must say, this is a great place. Wonderful food, wonderful service, wonderful music, wonderful attitude on the part of the staff...I only see one flaw, and I hesitate to mention it, but you have a little white thread caught in your pants zipper."

The waiter says, "I know about that, too. The same efficiency expert determined that ninety percent of the time, when a waiter is not on the floor, it is because he is taking a bathroom break. Ninety percent of the time, it is because he is urinating, and at least twenty percent of that time, he is washing his hands afterward. So we came up with a system to streamline that process. The thread leads to a loop which is tied around the head of my John Thomas. When I want to go to the bathroom, I simply pull down my zipper, tug on the string, pull my Johnson out, and hold it up while I do my business. I can then zip up without every having touched myself, and thus save the time I would normally spend washing my hands."

"Wow," says Ted. "That's amazing. I ought to try that sometime...but wait a minute. How do you tuck yourself back inside your pants before you zip up?"

"For that," the waiter says, "we use the spoon."

I Can't Believe The Turn of Topic
Many public restrooms are now of the no-door type: ie, the view inside is blocked by the bend of a corridor, so you don't HAVE to touch anything to get in or out.

*

Why Having Wolverine's Claws Would Suck

http://www.cracked.com/video_17328_why-having-wolverines-claws-would-suck.html

*

Yay to Neil Gaiman for saying what needed to be said!

Restroom woes
Phil, thanks for the good laugh... you created a new category: CLEAN bathroom humor! (pun very much intended)

Your little jape reminds me of a classic story by Damon Knight, called, with lovely irony, "Time Enough". (mini-spoiler alert; don't read the next sentence -- read the story) It's a Last-Man-(and Woman)-on-Earth story, and it involves someone being stuck in a restroom, and I will say no more.

And yes, to the person who answered seriously about how to open a restroom door, paper towels are effective, or any article of clothing you can yank over your hand.

By the way, being new here, I'm wondering if this site is always so digressive. Mea culpa. :)

crabs
I'd like to come to a defense, sort of , of Crab Monsters. Bill Warren, in Keep Watching The Skies, discusses how Charles Griffith's script has a number of interesting and effective ideas. There are moments that are genuinely creepy. {of course, then the crab shows up and blows it} No one is saying that Charles Griffith was Nigel Kneale but he wrote any number of scripts that were at the least interesting. (oh, that's Jack Nicholson under the crab...)

Of Kudo and Kudos
Harlan Ellison wrote:

"Nonetheless, thank you for the kudo."

My vocabulary isn't as finely honed as our esteemed host's (look at ANY of my posts!), but, according to the Compact Oxford Dictionary, kudos is derived from the Greek word kydos and is not plural.

Merriam-Webster says that kudos became a plural back in the 1940's, through a process called "back formation", which gave us words such as "cherry", formerly "cherise" and "pea", formerly "pease". I guess that explains, "Pease porridge hot..."

Pea on Earth, and kudos towards everyone el,
Brian Phillip

George Carlin used to brag that the reason he avoided serious illness as a child (referencing Polio in particular) was his regular swims in the East River. I don't remember the exact quote, but he claimed his immune system was strengthened by swimming "in liquid shit."

Not sure how much of the above can be attributed to creative license, though. If I fall head first into a latrine, I doubt I'll emerge Superman.

You could use a paper towel to open the door so you can avoid touching it with your hand.

Toilet doors
Dear Dr Landsberg,

I am writing this from a washroom, where I have been stuck this last three days. Alas, as is customary, the door opens inwards. Following your sage advice to avoid touching w.c. door handles, I remain marooned.

Until the next user happens along.

Awaiting your advice,

Phil

Steve Barber you do make an excellent point about recent F&SF movies. Just to add my own two cents, I would go so far as to say that the animated THE INCREDIBLES was better than most of the live action superhero flicks made in this same time span.

But really sir is it necessary to lambast so wonderful a motion picture as ATTACK OF THE CRAB MONSTERS? For shame. I have fond memories of my brother and my cousin and myself, little tykes all, being scared shitless by the crab monsters, scuttling out of the darkness, calling to the poor doomed scientists in the voices of the humans that they (the crabs not the humans) had recently gobbled up.

No classic of the western cinema certainly but I do genuflect at the altar of Roger Corman.

The other great mindf*ck when I was little was FROM HELL IT CAME about the mobile tree seeking revenge. Man I was days getting over that!

William Sherman

The effort to help semi-writer is not so much an official fund as a series of individual, direct connections. She could definitely still use a helping hand. Various folks around these parts have contact info for her. If you need, give a shout.

MM

Rob: Interesting point. There is nothing intrinsically dramatic about a piece of technology or even a story that serves up "great ideas." '20,000 Leagues Under the Sea' is not about a submarine. 'I Robot' is not about an ambulatory thinking machine. If stories are reduced to something philosophical or intellectual, they are merely didactic.

I remember always enjoying novels like Gore Vidal's 'Creation' and 'Julian,' but I always found them a little weak, because I secretly knew they were really essays disguised as fiction.

To write a story where the ideas and the artistry come together to make us think and perceive the world in a new way. . . well, that's majestic. Twain and Flannery O'Connor could manage that. Our host as well. Look at how the imagery and tragic irony of "Deathbird" transcends the shorter meditations on religion. H.E. uses the concepts to build the story's overall magnitude, but the story is alive on its own. Borges' "Garden of Forking Paths" invites us into a new way of seeing the world too, but to say its
about "randomness," "contingency," and "determinism;" would be a reductive insult to the story.

It's important to start with a story to tell, science fictional or otherwise. Once the story is alive, it generates systems within systems, expanding and going on forever.

Steve Dooner

NOTE TO ANDREW F. IN PORTLAND


There is an actual, correct & precise word for that useful and dramatic punctuational device. It is not "nice mutant infix," however you came up with THAT designation.

What I did is actually called

tmesis.

Which is to say, the purfosefuckingful insertion of another word in an already-formed word, where the syllable can be separated without fracturing your diphthong. Tmesis.

(In actual fact, to be yet again precise: what I did is not really correctly an example of tmesis. Because "tmesis" is a term that applies STRICTLY SPEAKING to the bifurcating of a single word, the insertion of ANOTHER word, and then smash reintegrating. ANYfuckingTHINGapparently is tmesis only if we drop the "apparently." I have no idea what the extended version I cobbled up would be called with the non-tmesis add-on.)

Nonetheless, thank you for the kudo.

And if you're a good boy, I'll let you ask me what apocapee is.

Yrs. in honed linguistics, Harlan

For Mr. Ellison's (and Others') Eyes Only
Dear Mr. Ellison et al.:

Been away for a bit, so just catching up with the Mobius strip conversation that is the Pavilion. Glad to hear that all is well with Mr. Ellison and everyone else.

Mr Ellison, sir: Just thought you'd like to know for your suit against Paramount, that the Brattle Theatre, Cambridge, MA, held on this past April 29 a "Star Trek Celebration", during which it screened six "Best of ...." episodes of the original series. "City on the Edge of Forever" made the cut as the third episode shown. Have flyer from the Brattle in my hand; yours upon request.

Furthermore, found in my pile of pulps "Asimov's" two-part serialization of your movie script for "I, Robot" (November and Mid-December, 1987). Wonderful, especially your treatment of Susan Calvin. Motivated me to read also your tribute in "Asimov's" to Dr. Asimov himself after his still-lamented passing in 1992. Moved me to tears. Much belatedly, thank you so much for all three.

Has collection started for "Semi-writer" yet? Tempted to augment my "Special Fund", with the Preakness to be run this Saturday. May share my picks with you "happy few" Friday.

Regards from Red Sox Nation,

William Sherman
Boxford, MA

Robert--thanks for the link.

**********

The 3 places where you are most like to pick up a virus:

Computer mouse/keyboard

Grocery store shopping cart

Rob

;)

NOTE TO ANDREW F. IN PORTLAND


There is an actual, correct & precise word for that useful and dramatic punctuational device. It is not "infix," wherever you came up with THAT designation.

What I did is actually called

tmesis.

Which is to say, the purfosefuckingful insertion of another word in an already-formed word. Tmesis.

And if you're a good boy, I'll let you ask me what apocapee is.

Yrs. in honed linguistics, Harlan

a few words from Neil Gaiman
3rd item down:

http://journal.neilgaiman.com/2009/05/entitlement-issues.html

Don't do that!
The old doctor joke about "it hurts when I do this" has now popped up at least twice here, so I'll mention that I, like most doc's, had my own real-life "don't do that" experience. A woman once came to me complaining of stomach pain. I asked, "When do you feel the pain?" She responded, "Only when I do this," and proceeded to push her fist into the pit of her stomach, reinforcing the effort with the other hand on her wrist; she pushed into her gut so deeply that I could imagine her fist hitting her spine. I tried to keep my jaw from dropping open as I pondered how to avoid sounding like I was mocking her by merely repeating the old joke. After a moment I realized there was no better way to say it, so I said it: "Well, don't do that." She said, "Really? Okay!" and left happily.

Don't ask me why she was doing it. She skipped out before I could recover from my astonishment.

And by the way, handwashing really is important. Do it a lot. Please. If you do it lots and lots, and make sure never to touch your face (especially eyes and nose) unless your hands are immaculate, you will avoid zillions of viruses (yes, zillions; I counted). Oh, and for cryin' out loud, faucet handles and doorknobs are lousy with germs -- don't touch 'em! (The hand sanitizers are very helpful, too.)

As for sf movies that have some brains behind them and some provocativeness on screen, let's not forget some of the more unusual and sometimes less heralded ones, and let's be inclusionists at least to the point of acknowledging intelligent flicks that may or may not really be sf, but which at least intersect with the genre in a meaningful way. Here are a few: Run Lola Run, The Fifth Element, Until the End of the World, Being John Malkovich, Stranger Than Fiction, and Brazil.

Steve Barber: Thanks for the compliment. UNEARTH was a labor of love; I'm glad you found it a delight. I'm proud of what we did (including recognizing the value of William Gibson's first story!)

Novels from typewriters and word processors
I am still looking into, and noodling Harlan's question about the first novel "composed" on a typewriter. Again, the earliest typewriters were clunky in the extreme and "composing" on them would be only a little more fun than just setting the damned thing right out of a printers type case.

I realized the other day I'm probably the last generation and possibly one of the last year or two of that generation that had the opportunity to set type out of a case in junior high school. I was lucky enough to go to some pretty well funded public schools and got to try my hand at a number of trades in one of the accelerated come-in-early-or-stay-late-and-we-will-let-you-monkey-around-with-this programs they had going in Appleton, WI back in the early 1970's. It gave me a real hands on appreciation for what a monumental pain in the ass this was and helped me to better enjoy Twain bitching about the printer's trade as it was performed approximately 100 years earlier since almost nothing had changed.

ANYWAYS... on the "composing a novel using a computer or a word processor" front I would think Niven and Pournelle (especially Pournelle) would qualify as some (or one) of the earliest adopters as Jerry used to write columns about some prehistoric PC junk presently decomposing in landfills and leaching toxins into the water tables. He's still very much around to ask and may wish to stake a claim.

- Barney

UnEarth, UnEarth, UnEarth. Oops, yeah. Here it is: EDITOR JOHN M. LANDSBERG.

Holy crap.

Good work, sir. Too bad it hasn't survived to this day, UnEarth was a real treat.

From editing UnEarth to being Harlan's doctor-of-record. Do you really see much of a difference???
___________________________________________

ROB - We remember the great films but tend to forget the bad ones -- remember, the same decade that produced FORBIDDEN PLANET, the original DAY THE EARTH STOOD STILL, THE INCREDIBLE SHRINKING MAN and THEM!, also produced PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE, BRIDE OF THE MONSTER, and ATTACK OF THE CRAB MONSTERS.

It's true most genre films these days are loud and CGI-driven -- but if you look hard there are diamonds amongst the din. There HAVE been some intelligent genre films in the last decade. JEROME BIXBY'S THE MAN FROM EARTH; K-PAX; A SCANNER DARKLY; CONSTANTINE; VANILLA SKY; WALL-E; CHILDREN OF MEN; THE ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND, are a few that leap to mind.

Just sayin'.
_______________________________________

SHALANNA - It may have been Asimov, but if I recall correctly, David Gerrold was also an early adopter of word-processing.

DTS,

"That last comment of yours is damn near enough to make me give up my aetheist ways and believe in a god."

WHY? Because I LIED about 'staying off the air'?

Never push your LUCK with ME! I'd have murdered every competitor in the Gold Rush of '48!

Newsletter . . . I'm missing something somewhere
I gather that there is a newsletter of some sort that I could be subscribing to (and buying back issues of?), but I can't find a way to order it anywhere on the site. I did go over to the DeepShag CD store to pick up the "on the road" CDs! Could someone, anyone, email me at shalanna.collins at gmail dot com and tell me how to get this newsletter? And/or anything else that is sent out regularly? (Except for bills, of course.)

Oh, and I remember Isaac Asimov writing in the old Creative Computing mag YEARS ago (I was but a CHILD) about how he used a Radio Shack TRS-80 and Electric Pencil to write his columns, stories, and novels!! He was the first novelist I ever knew of who wrote directly on the computer. He bragged about his cool Epson dot matrix printer, as well. As soon as I got a job, I got a crappy computer (I couldn't afford an Apple II, so I got a Commodore PET and their dot matrix printer) so I could do my writing on it. But Asimov did it before I did. Unless Arthur C. Clarke was doing it before Asimov, I would guess that Asimov is the first writer to draft directly on the computer screen and live to tell the tale. Someone asked this way up-thread.

I am so happy to hear that everyone from the Santa Barbara area is safe after these wildfires. Coming out there to see the place for myself as soon as I can scrape together the wherewithal!

Damn near..
ROB: That last comment of yours is damn near enough to make me give up my aetheist ways and believe in a god.

DR. LANDSBERG: Good to know you and yours are well (and good of Cindy to remember to ask, of course). The more I read about the Black Saturday fires that happened just north of Melbourne, the scarier such a no-win scenario is to me.

Cheers,
DTS

A-T:

I often respect the comments you post, but the "solution" you offered me borders on the absurd, if only because you're contextualing my argument in the most rigid terms possible:

Nothing has to be complex or dense to have some stimulating ideas, some interesting commentary, and even some respect for good science.

The ever-enduring Dr. Who series is a resounding example.

The two first Terminator movies had good ideas, as did The Hidden with Kyle MacLachlan, the first Robocop, The Truman Show, and the great fantasy Pleasantville. They combined action with provocative characters and themes...AND they kicked ass in the box office.

And if what you said were true, previous decades would not have seen success with movies like Forbidden Planet, Day the Earth Stood Still, Planet of the Apes, 2001 (of course), and Andromeda Strain.

The possibilities are inexhaustible; it simply depends on some vision and a brain. This has nothing to do with Sturgeon's Law. We're merely talking about way too much of the same shit for too long.

I'll stay off the air a while because of this posting.

Clipping Service: Yes, Charles Pierce is terrific - one of the best journalists currently working, in my opinion. Can't wait for his book "Idiot America." Any fan of Harlan's stories and essays would enjoy reading Pierce, I think (as would you, Harlan). And Rob, if you're concerned about mass ignorance in America, you in particular should check this book out.

**

Two recent stories in Britain's Daily Telegraph mentioning Harlan. The first, about Star Trek scandals, has a bit about The Lawsuit, and even a link to this here website:

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/star-trek/5244675/Star-Trek-the-scandals.html

The second, about computer games as literature, mentions the “I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream” game (though it also calls Harlan a “veteran sci-fi novelist”):

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/books/bookreviews/5291671/Endpaper---Fiction-reaches-a-new-level.html

Saw the ST movie a few nights ago. Good times, good laughs, all things considered, not bad.

It's been annoying me a bit to see it ranging in the 90% margins on critic lists. I mean, it's a fun movie: but it's not THAT good, c'mon. It's not exceptional, and it's not the best Trek movie I've seen.

Oh, but that guy playing McCoy did a good job. Not that the others were bad, but that guy was doing something different from the rest of them, which I liked.

Another nice "CITY" Harlan shout-out
in "SALON", from Andrew O'Hehir.....

http://tinyurl.com/qplwbt

....with link to his Harlan interview from SXSW.....

Various
Dr. Landsburg: happy to hear that your home escaped the fires.

*

I'm trying to think of a great sf/fantasy writer no longer active and can't think of the name. Irritating.

*

Why should Cleveland be different from anywhere else?

*

AFRAID by Jack Kilborn. Be very.

*

Rob: two elements work against the production of intelligent science fiction films. First, if you're talking about futuristic sf, the hardware is usually expensive as hell to reproduce on film and you often have to introduce the thriller element that too often makes things degenerate into action territory.

It is rarer to see a film that puts an sf trope against a contemporary setting, that can then be about that sf trope in some transformative manner; much more common to see such films with fantasy tropes, a much larger percentage of which are worth seeing.

In truth, much good sf on film is dystopic or post-holocaust sf, which stfictionally translates to "things continue to get worse." And it so happens that one film set for release this year, THE ROAD, has already gotten some rave reviews.

As for when the last compelling, thought-provoking (live-action) sf film was released: well, it came out almost simultaneously with the last great fantasy film. I'm talking about CHILDREN OF MEN and PAN'S LABYRINTH. And neither one of them was spaceship skiffy.

But even that's not the issue, really. The issue is that if you focus on any one genre, you find it almost as hard to remember the last great film released in that genre. What was the last great cop film? The last great private eye? The last great romantic comedy? The last great historical drama? The last great war film? The last great caper film? The last great satire? It's not that they're not being made -- they are. It's that if you narrow your focus to any one genre you are forced, with jaw-dropping incredulity, to the realization that ALL the genres go a couple of years between transformative exceptions. In romantic comedies alone, almost everything is idiotic fluff. Wait for a good one, that can be enjoyed by all four sexes without embarrassment, and it might take you months, longer if we're talking about a genre rarely visited nowadays, such as westerns. If you're waiting for a great sf film, let alone a great space-faring sf film, it's NORMAL to find yourself facing a long wait. It's Sturgeon's Law, but it's the nature of the beast, and a narrow focus only brings it into sharp relief.

various tidbits
To Cindy: Thanks for your concern about my welfare. You're very sweet. The fire is now 80 per cent contained, which means no further danger for anyone, and it will be out soon. My family and property (such as it is) are all safe. Thanks again.

To KOS: Good chili doesn't make you fart because it doesn't have beans in it. Aha! you say. And btw, as an habanero fan, you might be interested in investigating Naga Jolokia peppers. Go ask.com it (I can't stand the way everyone says Google it these days).

To everyone who has anything to say about reservatrol... first, please note the correct spelling, as I have it here. Second, yes go ahead and have some. It couldn't hoit. Additionally, a mention was made of Coenzyme Q-10... all I can say scientifically about it at this point (despite lots of QUESTIONABLE reports of its efficacy) is that 1. It seems safe, 2. It might do some good, and 3. It's darned expensive. So make your own decision on that one.

And finally, to Steve Barber, you made me smile when you pointed out that Harlan was a contributing editor to UNEARTH. He was indeed, and was instrumental in its success. And... you might want to go back and check out the names of the two primary editors, just for shucks. Let me know what you find out.

Cleveland is in the hands of the rich, and the Cleveland Plain Dealer is their mouthpiece.

-----------------

If Star Trek (or any other lesser subject, for that matter) offends you, don't read the posts about it. That's how I handle subjects that offend me. National Health Care interests me. 'Reality' television does not, so I never watch it or comment on it. Helps me stay sane that way.

"Doctor, it hurts when I do this."

"Well, don't do that, then."

Unca Harlan...

It was a joy to speak with you today. I was still giggling while I dealt with the phone calls that cut short our talk.

If only there was someway your fans could buy recordings of your hilarious stories...

Love you madly.

I can't remember the LAST time I saw a legitimately great piece of provocative SF in the movie theaters!

If it weren't for such RELENTLESS waves of dumb-ass mindless "computer games" posturing as movies, such diversions wouldn't be such an issue.

But there is fucking NOTHING out there! Not ONE fuckin' thing in the genre! And I'm just tired of it.

They did great stuff in the 60's, each effort entirely different from one another in style and substance, but the form faded after the early 80's.

And I think the reason I, myself, get so dithered by the whole thing (to the advice I often get, "loosen up - it's ONLY a movie!") is that, one, I'm completely od'd on the "pure entertainment" scene, and, two, more importantly, I think subconsciously, I connect it with the bigger, disturbing pattern of rampant cultural anemia strangling the American population, seemingly ingratiating the pig-ignorant masses on every front, dumbing them down that much more every year (look at some of the results: over 64% of Americans in the 21st century actually believe Creationism or "Intelligent Design" should be taught in the schools; and only NOW - after decades of scientists all over the world have been feeding us data about global warming - do lay people begin to accept the reality of impending disaster; and the list goes on).

Even in the 1950's, great sf films came out occasionally. Something that actually argued a point-of-view.

So, where I'm concerned, this thread was not really about Star Trek, but about yearning for substance from SOME goddamn movie out there!

That's why a line like DTS spit out last night, "the characters are ALL there", misses the main argument going down. WHO gives a fuck that the characters are there? Some of us are simply getting serious migraines from too much "sugar"!!

Mon Frere Longhair
Brian, thou hast rightly written. I did misspeak when I implied Baldhead Byrd was Zydeco, when of course he is firmly R&B/Blues?Rock And Roll.

I listened to "New Orleans Piano" quite a bit yesterday. Domino's version of some Longhair is coming up. Got to dig out my Clifton Chenier later today and do some of him.

I went through a period in the early to mid nineties where I explored this area widely, though shallowly, and now return, as it is music one may listen to dozens of times, getting something new Every Time.

I also went through Jazz in a similar fashion around the same time, and with similar results. I'm fixing to cover that ground again, once more, with feeling.

Zydeco for some reason just makes me smile. Maybe it's the frottoir (literally a washboard used for percussion), and the accordion? It's just got the feel of that part of the country.

For all its tragic history, the South, the Deep South (sorry Virginia. You're lovely, but you're practically Yankees) has some deeply mysterious beauty. Like a bayou cypress that's been through a hundred hurricanes, each leaving it more twisted, more tortured, until what was once a tree is now a freak unique larger than life "Bonsai In The Fun House Mirror" apparition looming over fog shrouded water reflecting the full moon. Zydeco, blues, early Jazz and Proto-"race Music" Rock And Roll all have that unfortunate beauty of distress in them.

Truly, the beans ain't salty enough. But they will do. They surely will.

KOS

Stop it, stop it, stop it...
No more Trek. No more. (holds head and rocks back and forth) Unless it involves the lawsuit, please... no more.

My last SF convention was in Pasadena back in 2004 (here's a pic of the fan showdown between ST and SW: http://tiny.cc/307nU); my goal was to simply drive from NAS Lemoore down to the Irvine Improv, but some FanBoy shipmate wanted to go to the convention so I indulged him. Plus the cast of "The Dead Zone" was there (http://tiny.cc/Vqb9l), which I was into at the time. In the main room was William Shatner addressing the crowd, and in a smaller theatre was Will Wheaton, reading passages from his book. I found Wheaton to be more interesting.

Not much going on otherwise. I've sold just about everything sellable, except for a collection of still movie photos that nobody probably wants, anyway ("Compulsion"). Two days of work coming up this week, Wednesday and Friday, but nothing else is on the horizon. Except for automated replies, I'm getting absolutely NO responses for the jobs that I submit for. No, wait. Universal Studios gave me one: "We have no openings that match your qualifications." Yea, thanks. I once signed up with a temp agency that said the same thing, "Nobody needs a super-duper typist right now." (Insert a little Steve Martin here, "Well, excuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuse me!")

Glad to see the 50% Shroud of Turin shirts are available. If you can't have a sense of humor with your wardrobe, what's the fun in life?

The Great Charles Pierce
on "Idiot America":

"The conflict between intellectual expertise and reflexive emotion—often characterized as “good old common
sense,” when it is neither common nor sense—has been endemic to American
culture and politics since the beginning. I do think that my profession,
journalism, went off the tracks when it accepted as axiomatic the notion
that “Perception is reality.” No. Perception is perception and reality is
reality, and if the former doesn't conform to the latter, then it’s the
journalist's job to hammer and hammer the reality until the perception
conforms to it. That's how “intelligent design” gets treated as “science”
simply because a lot of people believe in it."

Complete interview on his Amazon link. Worth reading:

http://tinyurl.com/ogotb8

50% Cotton 50% Shroud Of Turin (T-shirt)
A number of Webderland Pavilionaires, some who have identified themselves as atheists, have made inquiries regarding this shirt. And I would like to thank the good offices of Ellison & Co. for allowing this commercial message.

50% Cotton 50% Shroud Of Turin T- shirt
Black and Red on White.
(You could increase the unibrow-furrowing by 'splainin' to Ben Stein and Sarah Palin that this very good quality shirt is actually a 50% cotton / 50% polyester blend.)
Quick backstory: I wrote this joke many years ago after/while reading an article about the shroud in the old Omni Magazine. Production of this shirt started late last year. So, Guccione is finally/partially responsible for some clothing.

The price is $20.00 per shirt, L or XL. $22.00 for 2XL. Price includes shipping and handling within these continentals. Other sizes available. There would be a minimum increase in S & H costs for other areas on this Dark Age Planet. Checks or money orders only.

I would not have asked for this ad space if the only motive was profit. At least $1.00 per shirt, and quite likely more, will be donated to the Freedom From Religion Foundation in Madison, Wisconsin. They are good people, a small staff suffering growing pains, neck-deep in church-state issues. If you are unaware of this organization or of the exemplary work they do...www.ffrf.org (Pavilionaires will notice a glaring omission at this site. For a number of reasons, I would ask you to please let me handle that problem.)

In the 'So-Much-For-My-Salesmanship' Dept: You know, it's just a shirt. If you haven't read Ballard or Malzberg, well, buy one of their books. If you haven't heard Zappa or Zevon, buy one of their CD's. It bothers me to no end that in just a few weeks time, the mass produced Idols in America have garnered more attention than Warren Zevon ever did. And that's just taking into account the PR time that passes for journalism on the evening news. Also, it doesn't take a keen eye to see that many Pavilionaires are a proud and giving group. If, in these trying times, you can still help someone regain their footing, well, you know what to do. It's just a shirt after all. Plus, Dreams With Sharp Teeth will be available on DVD soon and I'm chompin' at the bit. If, after all of those deserving ducks are a' rowed, if you want one of these shirts, send me a message. Of course, HE did look stylish, now didn't he?

For specific ordering info, comments or questions, please reference 50/50 T-shirt in the e-mail subject line. And please note: This purchase can not be made on the Lay-A-Way plan.

Thanks

Richard Halasz

Not everything need be artistic. We need art, culture, but also time to let off steam. We may call these the in-between-moments.

Sex doesn't count. That's art. If you do it right.

-------------

Siano, Crouch is ok, but his conservatism about jazz is a bit much. His dissing of Miles Davis, because he compared Prince to Duke Ellington, was way overboard too. Miles had good taste...Wink.

wasting a post to say...
Howdy. I've been absent from here and the forae for the last few months. Nothing personal, no enforced hiatus, just got busy with life and other stuff and looked up and 4 months has done come and gone. I have no hope of ever fully catching up with the backlog, but in lieu of specifics I offer congratulations and condolences as appropriate for all I've missed. Hope all are as well as can be in your personal circumstances.

What, me? Oh, I'm good. Generally healthy though the tennis elbow comes and goes, I've developed rotator cuff issues, and the back recently had it's biannual excercise in strain pain. Warranty has officially run out. :-P Work is good; in our ever re-organizing business I'm in a team & role that removes at lot of day-to-day crises and allows me to be the tech savvy gal 20 years of experience brings, which is a huge improvement. Big oil paid me an official "big a**" bonus (based on last year profits) and zero raise (based on this year's price) but I got zippo complaints on that. I'm looking forward to a summer of travel with my sweetie starting with Puerto Rico this week, West Coast (SD/Ashland) in June, NY in July, Morro Bay (I hope) in August, and Chicago for labor day.

Cheers to one and all, hopefully I'll be back to my regular lurking now.
Peg

Anyone heard from Dr. Landsberg? I was hoping to hear that his property was preserved in his absence and the danger is now past.

Cindy



Finder Doug--
You are a wonder, sir. Your success surprises me not one whit.
:)
Cindy

Dear KOS,

I am glad to know that someone else enjoys Professor Longhair (Henry Roeland Byrd). Keeping in mind that our esteemed host has been a longtime fan of music and a music critic, I would like to recommend, "Mardi Gras in New Orleans" (Nighthawk) and "Professor Longhair: New Orleans Piano" (Atlantic) , or Fess: The Professor Longhair Anthology on Rhino, which seems to combine much of the first two records which were cut under a variety of names, "Roy Byrd", "Professor Longhair and his Blues Scholars" and "Professor Longhair and his Shuffling Hungarians", to name a few. Also, if you find a collection of (Antoine) Fats Domino's with the song, "Hey, Little Schoolgirl", you will find a pleasant surprise; Domino and in particular, his drummer, do a great Longhair-style song.

I would also like to stress that Professor Longhair is not necessarily considered "Zydeco" music. Byrd's influences were Blues and Latin music styles, whereas Zydeco tends to feature accordion (Byrd was a pianist) more times than not. The accordion came through New Orleans via the "Cajun" (French Canadians) people that migrated there. A mild exception is "Zolo Go" by Lightning Hopkins. Hopkins isn't playing guitar here, he is playing an organ and his playing mimics an accordion. Even though Zydeco and Byrd share a common region, New Orleans, LA, I would argue that they are two different styles, with some similar roots.

For Zydeco, the longtime, undisputed king of the genre is Clifton Chenier and once again, Rhino has a collection of his music called "Zydeco Dynamite" (by the by, I don't work for Rhino, nor do I collect any money by telling folks about their product). The name Zydeco is a corruption of the title of this post, which translates, roughly as "Snap Beans, Not Salty". If you say "Les Haricots" several times quickly, it sounds like "Zydeco". The earliest Zydeco artist is considered to be Amade Ardoin in the 1930's, although some believe his recordings do not differ much from the Cajun recordings of the time. This does, however, bring up a major historical distinction between Cajun and Zydeco music:

Cajun - White people
Zydeco - Creole and/or Colored people (I know, I know, this is not a post race stratification. Drink some coffee and please keep reading)

For other names in Zydeco, there is Rockin' Dopsie or the regrettably named Buckwheat Zydeco (the titular winner in this contest is Spade Cooley, but that is another post for another board!)

In other news, there is a new library in Colorado Springs. Not only did I purchase two books in the library bookstore ("A Mercy" by Toni Morrison and "Small Town" by Lawrence Block), but I noticed that they shelved their fiction in sections for "Fiction" and "Science Fiction" and "Shatterday" was, happily, in "Fiction". "The Essential Ellison" (2001 Edition) was nestled in the 813 (American Literature) section for all you Dewey Decimal fans along with "The Collected Works of Ambrose Bierce".

In other hopeful notes, they also had copies of "Dhalgren" by Samuel Delany and "Parable of the Sower" by Octavia Butler (three different editions). I am always happy to see well-stocked libraries, but I would like to give a quick thankyouverymuch to my hometown haunt, the Finkelstein Memorial Library of Spring Valley, NY (pop. 20,000). The village of SV has gone to seed in many areas, but thankfully, the library of my youth which was good in the 1970's has gotten even better with age. It has more floors, a Jewish Heritage Center and many more books and recordings than before.

Accordion Stoppe Keeper,
Brian Phillips

Apologies. I keep sabotaging myself. I ask the kittens to answer a question, then dangle a bright shiny play toy, distracting them hopelessly.

;-)
____________________________________

Haven't seen TREK yet, but my parents have. My mother, who suffered through the worst of my fanboy years, reports she is "now a Trekkie".
____________________________________

I am afraid the concept of a "local" newspaper will be the primary victim of the collapse of the industry. The survivors will either be a not-for-profit limited publication dependent heavily upon wealthy benefactors, or as national and therefore generic publications (a'la USA Today; The Wall Street Journal, etc.). There will still be "niche" players, of course, such as the neighborhood ten page mini-paper -- but the days in which each city had a unique and major voice are probably going to be gone in the new model.

Good News
Mark Evanier reports that Gene Colan will be attending the Big Apple Con on June 13th. This sounds as if Gene's health has improved, at least from where it was a while back. Oh, and Harlan, thanks for the information that Jeff Morrow's daughter was named Lissa. That was something I couldn't find anywhere. It was interesting that Jeff Morrow went back to commercial art once his acting career slowed down.

City on the Edge
I just saw the new DVD Trek Collection with "City on the Edge of Forever" topping the list. I'm not a regular member of this board Harlan. However I wanted you to know that since I saw this episode in the early 70's when I was a kid, your the guy who got me interested in reading books!

When I heard the controversy behind "City" I wanted to know your version of events. I wanted to read your script before other hands watered it down. I'm glad I did because at 10 years old your books introduced me to a world much more complex and real than Star Trek.

To Barney, re Stanley Crouch: Good choice. Crouch has a great sense of history, pride, and cultural nuance, and he is a genuinely independent thinker. I like him especially when I disagree with him, which is a terrific thing to say.

MARK GOLDBERG:

All good points Mark. When I worry about newspapers becoming dead media there are lots of factors to blame. One which is often forgotten is ex-VP Al Gore's championing the imprudent deregulation of media ownership in the '90s with a poorly thought-through Telecommunications Act meant to spur commercial (over) development of the Internet. Too much, too soon, for too many of the wrong reasons turned radio, tv and newspaper chains into toys, tools, and trophies for the cynical rich more than dependably researched sources of (relatively) objective, benign and useful information. Gore's naive enthusiasm for the infrastructure-building potential of unfettered GREED, simply failed to calculate all the inevitably negative consequences of such swift, uncontrolled growth. He might as well have publically set fire to all the federal protections the FCC once guaranteed to regional, minority, and small-stakes media ownership, and used the nation's newspapers for kindling.


Then again, there are those old-school anarcho-hackers who always believed/hoped/claimed that the internet could bring about the fall of consumer capitalism. Perhaps Gore was secretly one of their Illuminati?

Will Not "Get a grip"
DTS posted, "In the end, even the best of the ST stuff (new flick, some of the older flicks, handfuls of a couple of the TV incarnations) are only entertainment. Certainly not worth all the sturm und drang being spat out by you psuedo-nerds, and certainly NOT worth this much debate."

While there's nothing inherently wrong with a work being "only entertainment," that is not the best that we should expect or hope for. Not even from a STAR TREK story, be it TV episode, book or feature film. That is an example of the school of diminished expectations. I want better. I expect more.

Always late to the party
*** Harlan *** (and anybody else) Ever read any Stanley Crouch? Someone recently gifted me with "Notes of a Hanging Judge: Essays and Reviews, 1979-1989" and "Always In Pursuit: Fresh American Perspectives"

My subject header is the nut of it here. I feel as though I should have been on the tip with this guy since at least the 90's - but I'm on board now. About every three paragraphs I'll read a line and say to myself, "there's a turn of phrase that would make Harlan smile." I know your nightstand is groaning or collapsed or probably simply has not been seen in years, but on the atomically small to infinitesimal chance that you have shelved this fellow entirely un-read, do yourself a solid and dip into one of these.

Goes for the rest of you as well.

Hugs - Barney

Coalstonewcastle, PA.

ps. most recent two Rabbit Holes and the monkey with the plywood violin have all arrived safely. Many thanks for the "violin." - B

DTS,

It must be wonderful to be able to dismiss anyone who...you know...DIDN'T like the movie as a humourless nerd. I wish I could fall back on that kind of failsafe. It's a common technique these days; naive moviegoers who have any standard raised slightly above average can be effectively put down with a well-phrased "dontcha know how to have FUN, boy?"

You're right about one thing: Debating about the movie's not worth the effort or space. I'm sorry I even got involved.

I'm grippin' it. Now...WHERE should I put it?

Get a grip...!
BEN, ROB, RICK: Get a grip, you dingleberries! Got it? Holding on to those armchairs? Now, repeat after me: it's just a movie...it's just a TV show...it's only rockNroll. Old ST, new ST, puh-tay-toe, puh-tah-toe. Speaking as someone who didn't catch onto the trek stuff unitl syndication (I was living abroad), I enjoyed the hell out of the old show -- most of the time (there were plenty of times when it bored the socks off me because of too much preaching/teaching). I caught all the movies and enjoyed the ones that balanced MESSAGE (!!!) with action and character (although it could be argued that the main five or six or seven are actually caricatures...). Didn't check out the new show until it have been on for a few seasons or more, but I still found some of it entertaiining and some of it sleep-inducing (po-tah-toe, po-tah-toe). The new flick may not have a BIG MESSAGE behind it, but the characters are there and as well-acted as can be (considering the parts have always been fairly two-dimensional)...and the story and pace are fantastic. It's an excellent popcorn flick: a fun way to be entertained for a couple of hours (which couldn't always be said about much of the other celluloid material turned out with the ST label on it.

In the end, even the best of the ST stuff (new flick, some of the older flicks, handfuls of a couple of the TV incarnations) are only entertainment. Certainly not worth all the sturm und drang being spat out by you psuedo-nerds, and certainly NOT worth this much debate.

You liked it or you didn't. Time to move on. Seriously.


Which brings up a connection to something Barber was discussing: art, with a capital A (as in, Art).
In my (admittedly) ill-educated opinion, FAR too many people sling the word Art around when discussing the results of creative efforts, be it movies, musical recordings, paintings or writings. Most of the stuff that makes it to our hands, is put in front of our eyes or wafts gently through the airwaves into our ears is little more than entertainment. Not saying it isn't good or GREAT entertainment...or that it shouldn't be cherished (because enterntainment can be enlightening, too)...just saying that people label WAY TOO MUCH of it as Art. And it ain't.

Cheers,
DTS
P.S. Noticed how I discussed the dreaded subject without once using the actual words? (It think I should be given some sort of brownie points or something).

RICK,

Regardless of what Shatner is like in person (and heaven knows Harlan's introduction to the EDGE OF FOREVER screenplay told us EXACTLY what he's often like), I agree with your sentiments as to what he accomplished in the role of Kirk. I want to see Shatner return - be it as a resurrected Kirk, the "evil Kirk" from that old mirror universe episode, or whatever.

I know J.J. Abrams and everyone associated with this movie (including the moviegoers who have eagerly lapped it up) wants us to let go of the past and move forward with this younger incarnation of the old crew, but I couldn't shake this odd sense of discomfort. Not once did I view Chris Pine and co. as anything other than creepy doppelgangers, effectively replacing instead of honoring those who preceded them in the roles. I have no personal grudge towards the actors, including the always-dependable Simon Pegg, but I'm not enthusiastic about their performances. It's like all our old favourites have been supplanted by younger, sexier Body Snatchers - which I know was NOT the intent of the filmmakers.

I realize I'm in the minority on this one; everbody else seems to view the new film as a much-needed shot-in-the-arm to a decaying franchise. Maybe it needed it, and maybe it should have been left in peace; all I know is that Abrams's take on TREK has left me strangely depressed for reasons I can't accurately explain. I'm only twenty-six, but somehow the movie has left me feeling older than Leonard Nimoy's Spock.

Interesting article on e-book piracy. Harlan's quoted in the article. Cheers, Colleen

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/05/12/technology/internet/12digital.html?hp

"I tried hard to like the other Star Treks but couldn't for various and sundry reasons (due mostly to the cast and the formulae for the various shows). Despite the occasional enthralling episode, the spark and magic I felt (and still experience) with the original are missing."

KICK me in my dilithium crystals - there's ACTUALLY a voice of WISDOM in this joint at LAST!!

As goes the credo, in vino veritas, ANY kind of passion is a helluva lot better than grunts like "it SUCKS, man." I USED to expect far more than that on an Ellison site.

Rick, you voiced the feelings I've always had, not so much about the original as my regrets about what they miss in the movies and tv revamps. While I always had a number of problems with the original ST, its STRONG points are what the movies SHOULD be utilizing. I had a couple of conversations about this with David Gerrold some 5 years ago, and he agreed entirely with my sentiments.

No one gives a shit anymore about SOME celebration of science and reason in the stories; just comic book rock-'em-sock-'em CGI and tin can sound effects (and in case some lameass replies with "but I just wanna be entertained", that's fine except it's ALLLLLLLLL we see nowadays. The premise of the original ST - regardless of whether or not it succeeded - was to offer something for the mind as well as the eye candy. They've tossed that out of movies in general COMPLETELY)

Is the horse dead yet?
I just want to say this because no one else has and I MAY not exist entirely in a cultural vacuum. I'm not saying this to convince anyone of anything, I'm just saying...

I like William Shatner. I may even love William Shatner in the non-stalking way a fan thrills to the appearances of his onscreen idols. I don't know him, have never had any dealings with him, but as a viewer, he was quite possibly my first hero. From the days I crouched over the tv in the guest room, holding the antenna just that way in order to get the UHF broadcast of the original Star Trek, he was the guy: he got in fist fights, he outmaneuvered and out-thought his opponents, and damn if he didn't get the girls, too. He got beat up at times but he always won in the end.

I tried hard to like the other Star Treks but couldn't for various and sundry reasons (due mostly to the cast and the formulae for the various shows). Despite the occasional enthralling episode, the spark and magic I felt (and still experience) with the original are missing.

Star Trek for me is Kirk, Spock, McCoy, Uhura, Scotty, Sulu, Chekov, and the rest of the guys in red or tan shirts. And those guys are Shatner, Nimoy, Kelley, Nichols, Doohan, Takei, and Koenig. So while there's a certain amount of curiosity toward anything Star Trek, I'm not planning on seeing the new movie. Reboot, recast, re-whatever, the whole "re-doing" thing leaves me cold in the same way that remaking "The Day the Earth Stood Still" with Keanu Reeves and overusing CGI effects does. The boat was great while it was here but it sailed.

Anyway, I find the onscreen Shatner charismatic, funny, and appealing. When I hear him say what he said about not being in the movie, I think he has a right not only to say so, but to not be condemned for doing so. If most of us were him, most of us would more than likely feel the same way.

I dunno, as a fan I just like the guy. He could be the biggest ass in the world and I'd still tell you his Captain Kirk and his Denny Crane are wonderful. I thought he was great in his two Twilight Zone episodes, and on and on. The spider movie thing wasn't so great, but hey, I didn't see any reason to hold that against him. Now to find "Andersonville"...

Art and Craft

Regarding those definitions of whither "art," or "Art," or "craft;" and "artist" versus "entertainer" questions?

Good luck sorting those out.

Sheeples
Alan-- you said......
"Keep the populace as ignorant as sheep, and you can get away with whatever you wish.
Best way to keep the populace ignorant is to destroy the newspapers.
Best way to destroy the newspapers is to sell them to the ultra-rich conservatives who wish to rule the country."

In my opinion--- "They" are much farther along on the "sheeple" control than this actually-many magazines and anthologies have gone under so FICTION (such as it has been knowing current literary numbers)I'm gonna miss Best Horror and Fantasy and there are dozens more that drop by the side of the road each year without anyone noticing. (it's very similar to dozens and dozens of species around the world that become extinct each year)

.....Then you continue producing mothers milk-ish crap and pass it off as televised entertainment (many of you have your own lists)-- although one or two series sneek through for the few remaining cerebral of us like AMC's Breaking Bad etc...-- and then make sure to flood mailboxes convincing people they HAVE to buy their needs in "bundles" to save money as well as pushing plasma TV's so they can swallow this garbage in High Definition on 67 inch screens
(oohhhh-- aahhhhhh)
And for the few remaining sheep that have a life and don't follow weekly television you make sure to convince them they have to buy the latest iPhones, iPODS and Playstations

Once that's accomplished, you can pretty much (nearly) get away with whatever you wish to (and again, many of you have your own personal list of what the higher ups (and or various governments) have gotten away with)

Of course....this all just my opinion but I happen to agree with what Alan posted. Good luck to us all in the next twenty years

Dear David Ray: Received package. Thank you.

Dear Keith: Received check. Thank you.

All best-Susan

art v entertainer

Steve - Two thoughts on the particular question:

1) to me, calling someone an entertainer is not a diminishment. If an entertainer is someone who works hard at their craft and is very skilled, then that is a person to cherish. Successfully entertaining people is not so easy as it seems.

2) regarding the giants you list (artists each and every), my suspicion is (and I'd be interested in Unca Harlan's take), that when they're actually creating the work they're not thinking about the audience that much, but rather are striving to satisfy their own muse and exceed their own standards. Having an audience is not the same thing as fretting about the audience. But this is guesswork on my part. Others who know more can straighten us both out if they have a mind.

MM

STEVE - You California coffee weenies. (That would probably have more bite if I actually drank coffee.)

***

FINDERDOUG - Congrats on your story sale! Glad to hear it, and equally glad that you continue to make the grade in your classes.


shagin

I think I should clarify my question, these are all really great answers but don’t address what I thought I was asking (not your fault, mine).

I didn’t intend to ask whether the artwork was created for a specific audience, but your reactions to the work – once created – after the audience you elect to share it with (the target audience) doesn’t appreciate it the way you’d expected.

Whether art is CREATED for an audience, rather than being strictly for the artist’s needs, is entirely up the artist. (I initially rather liked Michael Mayhew’s friend’s definition of entertainer versus artist but later changed my mind. When it comes to certain static art forms it has validity, but it dismisses anyone in the performing arts as solely entertainers – and a great many of them are artists by any definition. It also assigns certifiable artists such as Annie Leibowitz, Alan Moore, and Harlan Ellison to entertainer status because in many cases they are hired to make their art. Does Straczynski’s spec script for CHANGELING earn the status of art, while his work for-hire writing 80% of Babylon 5 make that work solely entertainment?)

So: the question is whether you consider a work “failed” because the audience you chose to share it with doesn’t like/get it?

(I’m ignoring the whole “what if you don’t show it to anyone argument, since there’s no way to evaluate something that isn’t seen as a piece/work of art.)
_____________________________________________

TAR! Yeah team Lawyer! Tammy & Victor!!!
_____________________________________________

One of the very best seasons ever of this show, and one of the heartbreaking finishes – but the right team won.


Starbuck’s Memories: Part 3 – Attack of the Crazed Barrista

(One car in front of me in the drive-through. It takes a good three minutes of waiting for barrista to come on and ask for their order. The lone car pulls forward.)

SBUX: “Please hold for a moment, I’ll be right with you.”
SB: “Okay.”
(Three minutes. Car in front pulls away.)
SBUX: “Thank you for waiting. What can I get for you?”
SB: “Venti coffee.”
SBUX: “I’m sorry, what?”
SB: “Venti coffee, please.”
SBUX: “I didn’t catch that. What would you like, please?”
SB: (slowly) “Ven-tee caw-feee.”
SBUX: “Coffee??”
SB: “Yes please.”
SBUX: “What size?”
SB: “Venti. Large. The biggest cup you have. BIG!”
SBUX: “Okay.” Uncomfortable pause. “Please drive forward.”

SBUX: “Okay, one venti coffee, right?”
SB: “Yes, please.”
SBOX: “Would you like cream or sugar?”
SB: “Splenda, please. No cream.”
SBUX: “Not sugar?”
SB: “No, Splenda please. Or Equal, or whatever you have.”
SBUX: “We’re out of Splenda. We only have Equal or sugar.”
SB: “Um. Then Equal, please. Three packets.”
SBUX: “Of Equal.”
SB: “Yes, Equal.”
SBUX: “Not sugar. Equal.”
SB: “Yes, Equal. Three.”
(Two very long minutes later she returns with the three packets of Equal in a little bag with a stir stick. Hands it out the window.)’
SBUX: “Thank you for choosing Starbuck’s, have good day.”
SB: (looks around) “Um. The coffee???”
SBUX: “Didn’t I give it to you???”
SB: (pointing) “No, I think that’s it right there.”
SBUX: “Are you sure I didn’t give it to you??? I think I gave it to you.”
SB: (gesturing at car’s empty cupholder, then at lone cup on counter) “No, I’m sure THAT is my coffee.”
SBUX: (frowns, not believing) “Oh, okay, I guess.” (Picks it up, goes to hand it to me. Stops)
SBUX: “You wanted cream in it, right???”

(Sound of gunshot, fade to black.)

Michael,

I worked at a newspaper for 3 years, and I agree with many of your comments. No one has any idea what the future holds for newspapers or media in general. Newspapers receive more attention because so many of them are being shut down or are in the verge of being closed, but both radio and television stations are struggling mightily also.

You are correct in the assertion that newspapers missed the boat back in the 1990s by allowing their content to be accessed free of charge but something will have to change in terms of payment structure in the very near future if newspapers hope to survive. Some options that I have seen floated include a micro-payment type system that would allow users to pay for only the content that they access on the Internet and greater sharing or collaboration between local media outlets (TV, radio, etc.).

This will help in coverage of local events but in terms of more national or international coverage there ain't no easy answers because you are correct Internet sites cannot send people to Pakistan or Iraq. Some of them might form relationships with local bloggers or news sources, but those partnerships are also ephemeral at best.

Also, and many of my friends who are bloggers will admit this, they are not reporters. They can provide an interesting perspective on a story, or spark some excellent discussion, but if they do report on a story (such as Joshua Micah Marshall's excellent work on the firing of Attorney Generals during the Bush administration) their bandwidth is incredibly narrow. Simply put, they cannot step into the breach and replace newspapers.

One option that is being considered right now is to have newspapers become non-profit organizations. Under that scenario, subscriptions would become tax deductible donations and the tax structure would be radically different. That would help but would not be a panacea because many newspapers face two hurdles that will not be addressed by that change in status: too much debt and plummeting revenues.

My former employer, the Minneapolis Star Tribune, is an example of the problem with debt. They were purchased by a private equity firm that put up only about 15-20% of the capital necessary to purchase the paper and leveraged the rest. The paper now actually does make a profit (after slashing the workforce dramatically and re-negotiating a ton of contracts), but because of the crushing amount of debt held by their owners they are bleeding red ink.

Ad revenue, as Michael alluded to, is also hemorrhaging. I know that the Star Trib's revenue saw a drop this past year that they had not seen since the 1930s, and other papers, such as the NY Times have seen ad revenue drops on the order of 30+%. No one has any answer for how to address either of these issues.

If I had to guess, I would say that the future of media would be one where there is one central organization that handles the business side of the paper, while there are small bureaus in major cities that focus on just a couple of key issues relevant to that market and aggregate the data from other areas in a news-feed type of approach. From an online perspective, I would expect newspaper websites to become much more interactive, and allow a greater level of user-derived content to be published in an attempt to become more integrated into the local market and to drive up web page views

Kudos to Paul Kurtz in Skeptical Enquirer magazine, for admitting that atheists have been lax in dealing with personal moral issues, letting the religious right run in front on that issue, while secularists mostly dealt with Church/State separation, civil liberties, etc.

You atheists let us believers control the debate. Balls in your court guys.

Another good article in that magazine dealt with the fact that there are also female atheists, suggesting that the new atheism is pretty male centered.

Susan Jacoby is one of the many good secular women, who also had a big best seller. But, is she lionized like Dawkins or Hitchens?

Food for thought.


----------

I am amazed that they never made a sequel to Who Framed Roger Rabbit. It may be too late.

Keep the populace as ignorant as sheep, and you can get away with whatever you wish.

Best way to keep the populace ignorant is to destroy the newspapers.

Best way to destroy the newspapers is to sell them to the ultra-rich conservatives who wish to rule the country.

...quickie review (sorry, hit return accidentally). Having violated the one post a day rule, I shall absent myself for 24 hours. Isolation shall be my salvation.

Thanks
To infomite for the information and ATC for the

Newspapers and
MICHAEL – I’ve been in grad school for two years pursuing a Masters in Journalism, and your post is the most concise assessment of the hollowing out of the newspaper industry’s gourd that I’ve come across yet. Thank you. While they’re putting together all manner of new media-centric classes for those seeking to move into journalism, no one is discussing with the next generation the main problem: how do you create a new business model for newspapers now that a) the financial genie is long out of the bottle and b) people are accustomed to turning to aggregators instead of the news gatherers themselves. I suspect in their hearts, no one wants to accept that the answer may very well be, “You can’t. Too late.” (They stopped trying to sell us “Print isn’t dying” about 18 months ago… about the time we turned the volume on our incredulous gazes to 11.) Me? Well, two years and a gob of money later, the marketing writing position I currently inhabit is a more ripe plum than it used to be.

STEVE – This will be the most unhelpful response you get all week: *shrugs* I dunno.

I find I don’t wade with a thought of a target audience beyond myself (except when there are specific requirements set forth in creating the piece, for example, for an anthology; and then that’s more a case of writing within an established framework and considering an audience of one: the editor). I know the story I want to tell and what I want to convey in that telling (be it simple amusement or VAST, DEEP CONCEPT), and I write it until I have it to my satisfaction. I WILL run it past two or three exacting readers who I know will call “bullshit” on me if I have been lazy, boneheaded, or simply dull. I use these people because they won’t give me banalities like “That was good.” They will turn screws into my flesh if they feel the work warrants it. They’re the buffer that helps move me back to look at the story objectively again after being with it at the genetic level. If they miss my point, I'll know I may not have made it well. Likewise, they will tell me if I've cudgeled them with it. If I satisfy myself AND please a simple majority of them, my confidence in hurling my child out the door and into the pit of spikes to Fly or Die goes up.

But everyone out there is going to bring their own baggage through the door anyway, their own filters of experience, their tastes, their biases, their levels of comprehension. I can’t predict how it’s going to fly, and I think I’d go crazy trying. Will I be disappointed if something I think is nifty-swell instead goes over like a fart in church? Probably. But is it an artistic failure? Tricky word, artistic – very subjective. My art is nor yours is not Joe the Rag Man’s. At the end of the day, you can find failure in the mechanics, or the execution, or the tone – but you also have to consider that you can do every single thing right and well and have it sail right over the heads of the people you think may grasp it; or realize a critical flaw in your own execution on the back end and yet have them love it so much en toto that you’re then stuck with this thing you can now only see as a shambling, crippled mess.

THAT SAID: Tales of the Unanticipated sent word Friday that they’ve accepted my story “Lorem Ipsum Donald” for Issue #31; that puts one of my stories in each of their next two issues (this September / next August). Mayhap there will be brickbats for both stories when they arrive between glossy covers from people who think I’m a burbling asshole whose fingers should be cut off, lest I sin again. But on a Monday morning, metaphorically speaking, I’m less concerned with what the psych professor and the guidance counselor and the lunch lady think – the Dean of Admissions likes my kid just fine.

File Under Gumbo
I made chili today. I'm no Harlan, but I have some skill. A little powder, a little garlic. Just the right touch of cumin, a scintialla of salt and a heady whiff of my own favorite spice: Gumbo File.

To me it is the "secret ingredient" that gives my chili that undercutting slide trombone note of "I am chili, and I will not be denied".

Betimes, when in the mood, I open the twelve years and aging bottle of Habanero peppers.

Nut not today.

Today was a simple black bean, with thick roux undertone and mild burn as a final note.

There was even a hint of smoke from some of the beans. Not sure which of the ingredients did that, but it was interesting.

Good chili never makes you fart.

That's my story, and I am sticking to it.

I am refreshing my memory of Zydeco, a musical style from Louisiana. Professor Longhair was one of the practitioners in painoforte of Zydeco. Man, I loves me some Longhair. I loves me some Deep Blue Bayou notes and that slip-slide manic rhythm.

Y'all needs to check out Clarence Gatemouth Brown. His "Sister, Sister" is the Real Thing. Blues, that is.

"Bleed Your Cedar" by ELysian Fields. Strange N'Awlins atmosphere mood wendigo pookah sound.

Come back down with a little Indigo Girls, maybe "Swamp Ophelia" and a chaser of Patti Smith so you don't fall completely back in your rut. I suggest "Gloria".

I hate flossing. It ought to be automated, done in our sleep by tiny robotic elves. But then they'd go crazy, because no one likes flossing, and would build huge evil robot elves that would become overlords of the human race, making everyone floss three times a day.

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

KOS

ATC:

I was catching up on the Pavilion, while having my Glass O' Wine (a glass a day keeps the pink elephants away) when I read your posting. Good thing I didn't take a sip then or my keyboard would have looked like Dracula spewed all over it.


Chuck

Target Audience and a recommendation

From Steve Barber: "When you're creating art, is it successful if the 'target' audience -- the people you WANT to affect with the artistic creation -- doesn't understand or like it? "

A friend of mine once told me that the difference between an artist and an entertainer was that an entertainer cared what the audience thought. I think it's entirely possible for a creative person to move back and forth between those roles, with even some gray area in between, but on the whole it seems a useful definition.

*

Last night Denise and I watched Mike Leigh's terrific film Happy Go Lucky. Definitely worth your time. Full of great performances, funny moments and sad moments, and some astonishing work my Eddie Marsden (recently in Little Dorrit, as Panks) who is quickly becoming one of my very favorite actors.

MM

Quickie Answer
I loved A BRIEF HISTORY OF THE DEAD.

Bob Homeyer's Query

Bob,

I believe the book you are looking for is titled:

_The Brief History of the Dead_, By Kevin Brockmeier

It came out in 2006, from Pantheon Books

Good luck, I hope you enjoy it.

informationally yours,
the mite

Martha's Grammatical Horsewhip:

Yeah, yeah: "depends ON your intentions" or even, what-the-hell, "upon"......

we don't mean "in"

Steve: "I tend to shrug and move on, assuming to myself that I am missing something in the work that others are seeing (or vice versa). But if they didn't "get" it or just don't care enough to be moved, then, to me, it failed."

As you know now, I'm slowly navigating to writing myself, learning the process, the right voice, and so on.

I like your question because it applies to your TARGET audience, the group you assume will grasp whatever subtle references you've airballed in the prose.

I feel that depends in your own intentions: if the story was mostly written for yourself, and you have no passionate need to connect with listeners (or readers), then HOW can it be a failure?

If, on the other hand, you wanted to reach people with something "important", then in my OWN rule book it's a failure.

It depends on your own hopes, aims, and expectations.

My own intuition - virginal and naive like the country girl in wee tight shorts though it may be - tells me not to abandon what I felt was a great idea but RETURN to it and rework it. That is, IF the story itself was important enough to YOU, and it's something you WANT to share with others.

What do filmmakers do when they want to know how their new movie will fare? They pre-screen it to a free audience. When a response falls short of their hopes they take it back to the editing room.

Speaking for myself, I now have files of dynamite story ideas (including many drawn from important recent events in my life). The sentiment behind everyone one of 'em holds firey passion; yet, when the time comes I'm going to first have to seperate what amounts to a dead-end premise (perhaps what might later serve part of another narrative, but cannot stand on its own) and what has clear potential for a solid narrative. As a guy who's come to love the Absurdist theater of Dada, this is a challenging admission!

This means that I want to reach people with something in my heart, that they otherwise may not be able to relate to. The narrative therefore becomes a balancing act: I don't want to "explain" everything; allusion is what gives dimension to art. But if I want the target audience to connect, then I need to gear some of the elements in a way that makes 'em palpable.

If I have a story that felt met these criteria and the intended audience still didn't get it, then I have to either deem the STORY a failure or the AUDIENCE a failure.

That's ME, anyway.

If the story is imporant to you personally, I think you should look at it again and figure out just WHAT you wanted to communicate to your target audience. Who knows? Maybe it's one of those things ahead of its time (hell, Moby Dick was a failure in its day; and in the artworld, the painter Rousseau was LAUGHED out of every exhibit in the 1880's). But if you don't want it to wait till later it has to be retooled.

As for a guy like David Lynch, he actually found a following by using impossibly obscure imagery. Eraserhead alone has its groupies, and Mulholland Drive got critical raves BECAUSE it made no sense! (I'm not sure if any other filmmaker in history ever pulled off THAT coin flip!) But I think even THAT has to be done right in order to find an audience.

Here's what you should do: get stoned, or jump off a building, or take a flight in NASA's shuttle, THEN go back and rewrite the story. YOU'LL find your audience!

Literary ID Help Please
There was a novel reviewed in the NY Times Review of Books about 3-4 years ago whose title and author escape me; however I recall the basic plot. In this novel, humanity was split into three classes -- those who are living, those who are dead but are still remembered by the living (and occupy some sort of limbo world), and those who are fully dead and unremembered. I vaguely recall the plot involved one of the three populations was quickly decreasing (the remembered dead), and the story explored the reasons this was happening.

The review said it was a fine idea that wasn't well-executed. I set it aside mentally, remembered it recently, and with all due respect to NYTROB, I'd like to make up my own mind. Does this ring a bell for any of you?

Newspapers
Semi-Writer, it isn't "the diversity of new media" that's left newspapers in such a dire state. There are three basic, interrelated reasons for newspapers' plight, and they have little to do with the quality of the journalism they're producing compared with new media, and everything to do with business mishaps and bad business decisions.

One: Newspapers made a tragic mistake when they bought into the Internet's "information wants to be free" ethos and gave away their content online rather than charging for it. That not only deprived them of a source of revenue and let aggregators like Google scoop it up, not only drove readers away from the print paper (why pay when you can get the same stuff online for free?), but it also encouraged people to think of news as something that has no intrinsic value.

Two: Newspapers' business model, which relied heavily on attracting display and classified advertising, collapsed under the weight of Internet competition - not editorial competition, mind you, but competition from sites like Craisgslist, which has essentially destroyed the classified-ad market that newspapers could once count on as a cash cow to fund their news-gathering operations.

Three: When confronted with tighter economic times and the financial crunch caused by factors One and Two, by and large the people who own newspapers - the publishers and other bean-counters, not the editors - shortsightedly chose to cut their expenses to the bone. Rather than accept smaller profit margins, or invest in their product to improve its appeal at a time when that desperately needed to happen, they laid off reporters and editors, slashed other costs and scaled back the scope of their coverage.

I don't know anything about the specific situation of the Cleveland Plain Dealer - but if it really is a bad paper with a bad website, I'd wager these economic factors are a big part of the reason why.

I am a journalist, as I've said here before, a columnist for a major financial-news wire service. I got my start in newspapers, though my work today is read primarily online, via subscription to our service. So I suppose you could say I've got a foot in both camps. But my sympathies are squarely with the beleaguered newspaper - and if we lose it, as it appears is the danger, we are going to lose a critical element of what makes our society function.

I know that sounds like I'm getting on my high horse, but there have been recent studies that show when and where newspaper journalism goes away, political accountability and participation goes down - malefactors know there's no watchdog to keep an eye on them, and the average citizen doesn't have enough information to make an informed decision. In one study - which I mention here as an example only because I happen to have read about it yesterday and so I have the information at hand - researchers at Princeton University reportedly found that after one of the big daily papers in Cincinnati shut down in 2007, the number of people voting in local elections declined, as did the number of candidates challenging incumbent officeholders.

When I say "newspapers" are vital to democracy, by the way, I don't mean the paper-and-ink product per se - whether it's desirable or not, that part of our culture is on the way out. I'm talking about an organization that reports the news as comprehensively as newspapers do and acts as a check on government's excesses. THAT desperately needs to survive in some form; the question is what the form should be, and how to make it financially viable.

And don't tell me the Internet will magically pick up the slack. While there are websites out there producing quality original journalism - Talking Points Memo comes to mind - most of the "news" you see from websites not affiliated with mainstream-media organizations isn't really news at all. It's links, pilfering and commentary that piggyback on reporting that someone else, typically with a newspaper, has spent time, money and effort to do.

Internet sites aren't going to maintain correspondents in Iraq, Afghanistan and Pakistan. By and large, Internet sites aren't going to send reporters to the town-council and school-board meetings in thousands of communities across the country. For the most part, Internet sites aren't going to spend months, and lots of money, on investigative projects that uncover official wrongdoing. Only newspapers are doing that, pretty much. (To be sure, newspapers themselves are doing less and less of it, which is also part of their problem.)

I don't know what the answer is to the news business's plight - a lot of people a lot smarter than me are trying to come up with one, and so far nothing's worked. But something had better work, and soon. Because as much as people online like to crow about the impending death of the mainstream media, they aren't going to like what the world looks like without the mainstream media.

Target audience
From Steve Barber: "When you're creating art, is it successful if the 'target' audience -- the people you WANT to affect with the artistic creation -- doesn't understand or like it? Is it an artistic failure if you don't reach the people you want to reach with your work?" I tend to shrug and move on, assuming to myself that I am missing something in the work that others are seeing (or vice versa). But if they didn't "get" it or just don't care enough to be moved, then, to me, it failed.

If the target audience didn't get it or it didn't move them, that does not necessarily mean that the work itself is a failure... it could fail on several fronts, even because of the genre itself. The genre could be too obscure, too detailed or even too simplistic (and you're trying to complicate it), and so on. Also, when you focus in on a specific group, you're automatically cutting down on the work's exposure--the masses that might read it fall by the wayside because it's not in their interest to tap into whatever genre you're exploring. Which means you're dealing with only (or pretty much only) a small group of "experts" in their "field." Or know-it-alls, if you want to be rude.

So therein enters the inclusion/exclusion factor and subdivisions of human behavior: are you an ousider trying to get in to their realm, or are you an insider that's not fully accepted for your efforts, or are you an insider trying to be king of the world with what you've produced? An innocent work of art, one that you do simply because you like it, can be taken many different ways by those you are presenting it to.

Now we factor in human diversity: education level, experience with that field and related fields, personal standards and tastes, etc. Maybe these people haven't done their research on the genre/topic and know too little, or maybe they've done too much and have a backlog of details to support their views. Or, to hearken back to an earlier post here on the Pavilion, maybe you write something humorous about audits and people take it seriously--lack of a sense of humor reflects a lack of a scope of thinking.

Me? I write something because I see a particular angle in the storyline and I look for the basic idea to ring true (can't remember where I read it the quote--some film magazine back in college--but director David Lynch described a working idea as one that "rings" and a lousy one as one that "thuds"). I don't chalk it up as a failure unless it doesn't work for me. Screw the rest of the world. There are too many other factors affecting readership to take it all personally.

Once you throw something out to the public, it's open for interpretation, misinterpretation, and unfair judgments. (What, do I still sound bitter?) If it IS universally accepted? Hey, congratulations! But it's still miraculous to have anything achieve mass acceptance.

Acceptance speech

Harlan limited to 3 minutes of speaking? Why, would he do with the second lungful of air?

ATC - Coffee through the nostrils. Who needs caffeine?

__________________________________________

Went to a party of the Writers' Bloc last night. Read one of my old short stories aloud. WHY WE KILLED THE BEE GIRL, from 1994. Didn't suck. (The story OR the reading.)

As Harlan knows, the no-longer-just-writers' group tends to start the evening with a question regarding creativity and goes from there. (He called me once during a party and offered his own input on the question of that evening.)

Last night's question: "When you're creating art, is it successful if the 'target' audience -- the people you WANT to affect with the artistic creation -- doesn't understand or like it? Is it an artistic failure if you don't reach the people you want to reach with your work?"

I tend to shrug and move on, assuming to myself that I am missing something in the work that others are seeing (or vice versa). But if they didn't "get" it or just don't care enough to be moved, then, to me, it failed.

Thots?

The Cleveland Thing
I got together with a bunch of friends and said, "You know what? You know what we need to shake things up around here? A major event! Why don't we put on an award ceremony to honor some random famous guy who used to live in this neighborhood, and get the guy to come to the party?"

They said, "What a great idea! Only we don't know any famous people who used to live in this neighborhood. This place is the Chelm of our entire region. People on our block, if they get their picture in the newspaper, it's usually because some cop is helping them into the back of a squad car. But you're saying we got a famous guy? Mazel Tov!"

And I said, "I mean the folk singer, Aloysious Grobotnik."

Of my six friends, four said, "I've never heard of the guy."

One said, "I only listen to Latvian sheepherding madrigals."

Another said, "I might have to forego the ceremony if you invite him, because I was at the head of the pitchfork-wielding mob that chased him to the old windmill."

I said, "Look, he's not as famous as David Hasselhoff, who drove through in 1984, but he's got a following, people care about him, and he's from the neighborhood. Or at least was, sixty years ago, when he was hiding out from that false espionage charge. Before he cleared his name, made some money, and got the hell out."

"But if we DO get him, do we have to, you know, pretend that we actually respect him? Because we don't wanna give him the impression we're actually interested. He's just an excuse to sell banquet tickets."

"Don't worry. We'll make it clear to him that we don't want anything but his face on the poster and that if he speaks for more than thirty seconds we'll have the band play him off."

"Won't he find that a little insulting?"

"Hell, no! We're HONORING him, aren't we?"

"Okay. Whatever. If you can get him, we have a guest of honor. Just save money on the invite so we can splurge on the chopped liver."

So I contacted Grobotnik, somehow getting a phone connection to the little Tahitian grass hut where he's been been working on his operetta THIRTEEN WAYS TO SMOKE A BANANA. And he was thrilled to find out that his old neighborhood wanted to honor him but got all huffy when we mentioned that he had to spring for his own airfare to and from the ceremony, a journey which would have only required three or four separate connections and a final leg aboard a biplane where his passage would have been in a burlap sack being towed from the tail assembly.

Nor was he happy about having to pay for his lodging while here, since the only available room was in a wedge-shaped room under the fire stairs, which cannot be locked since he'd have to share his accomodations with the ice machine for that entire floor.

Nor was he happy that we wouldn't even provide his overalls on the two days we had enlisted him to help paint our undersecretary's house.

He was especially upset when I told him that the award banquet was a buffet and that since we couldn't afford servers he would have to stand behind the bowls doling out swedish meatballs with a ladle. This, I told him, would be part of the honor, and he demurred even though I had not yet told him about volunteering to clean up afterward.

Lord alone knows what kind of snitty attitude he would have pulled if I had told him about earning money for the high school glee club by sitting in a dunk tank above the pool of baked beans.

So we all called the local newspaper, which is now printed on a 3 by 5 index card because that's all the ad revenue will pay for, and which because of space considerations has to summarize all the daily news into a single headline which is usually some variation of THINGS AROUND HERE SUCK. (Which is pretty accurate and concise, but, you know, still.)

And I gallantly told them that this really famous person Grobotnik was a total ego monster who wanted to be catered to and couldn't be bothered to help out his old neighborhood and who should have dropped everything in his life to fly out and see us, because who the hell is he, anyway, nobody on the award committee even knows who he is.

And of course now I'm stuck trying to find another famous person to honor, one who fulfills the triple requirements of being from our region at some point in the distant past, being sufficiently desperate for attention that he'll pay out of his own pocket for the privilege, and not caring that we honestly don't give a crap what he's famous for as long as he sits behind the dais and behaves himself and his grateful for the pat on the head.

Does anybody out there know if Joe Franklin still alive?

*

My only word on the new STAR TREK, which I saw yesterday: it's incredibly bad science fiction and has logical flaws up the wazoo but it nailed the characters and I loved that aspect of it, and overall had a good time, but now the movie-watching aspect of my life can look forward to some releases I'm actually looking to, like Scorcese's version of SHUTTER ISLAND, and Tarantino's INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS, and Peter Jackson's THE LOVELY BONES, and the inevitability that there are great movies still set to be released that we haven't even heard of yet.

*

Happy Mother's Day to all of you who have or have had uteri (or have emerged from same). I'm curious as to whether that leaves anybody out.

Missed Your Call
Harlan...

I took Sainted Wife Barb to Columbus to see our son yesterday, so I missed your call. We'll be visiting my mother and hers today. I'll return your call on Monday.

But, just to ease your mind...

No, I'm not ashamed of you.

Cleveland is a zombie that doesn't realize it's dead.

The only reasons I ever go there are to see my parents, to see you, and to go to the very occasional Indians game with my kids.

Your situation is like the punch line to a joke. I mean, really, they wanted you to *pay* to come to Cleveland?

There are times when I'd pay not to have to go to Cleveland.

Love you and Susan madly and always.

AND BOBBY MAKES THREE
Harlan,

The Cleveland PLAIN DEALER is barely worth reading one time, let alone three; however, I, too, set aise the entirety of today's PD for your records. I will send it to you if you require a third copy.

Bob Ingersoll

TO KEITH CRAMER
About that edition of "Mefisto in Onyx" that you had trouble extracting? Try this. Remove the book, but the next time you replace it, place a silk ribbon underneath it running from side to side, with at least an inch's worth free on each end. This way, you can pull the two ends of the ribbon and lift the book out with less difficulty. Red and black seem to be appropriate colors to use.

To Harlan, re my question: Message received. Understood, and understandable. Check. Gotchya. Loud'n'clear.

John Furia
John Furia, 1929-2009: http://www.latimes.com/news/obituaries/la-mew-furia10-2009may10,0,3491900.story

---------------------------

Newspapers all over the world are being pushed out of operation thanks to the diversity of the new media, so it should be no surprise that a lot of lower-class publications are now cheaply produced. Kindle2 is about the only thing that's being touted as a savior of the newspaper industry. Whether that's true or not has yet to be seen, obviously.

But a lot of publications are gonna go down. That's for sure.